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New to the scene - Anyone got some advice?

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Hi guys,

I am a 24 year old redhead and my boyfriend is 31. We are new to this scene, we are both fairly submissive by nature but both switch take the dominant with each other. 

We have been lurking around here for a while (pretty much since we got together) but never posted a lot as we are interested in the lifestyle but it all seems quite daunting. We are both quite shy and would love to get into this lifestyle. 

We have been looking for someone else (a man) into the bedroom to try to see if we can make our fantasies a reality but every time we do we get disappointed by the amount of fakes that are around. 

Does anyone have advice as to what we should do to try and turn this fantasy into reality? Also, are there any decent websites we could perhaps use?



I got into munches / clubs before I left the U.K. and met my now wife, who did not know that these places existed despite what she thought was her having abnormal fantasies / fetishes. I introduced her into things gradually and it really helped her in opening up. I would highly recommend going to a few nights out with fellow kinksters, most I have been to in the past (admittedly a few years ago now) people were very friendly and it was nice to be open with everyone. There are normally other first timers there as well. Type in fetish / bdsm nights in the search bar for your local area and see what comes up. 


Perhaps you guys should have a natter about absolute specifics and really narrow it down as to what sort of person and what you would expect from them.....have some chats with the actual person as well, before meeting up...nothing worse then setting yourself up for a disappointment!  Hey, it's great that you two have similar tastes and you've got together☺️

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