BDSM events

[Li****]

When attending these kinds of events for the first time, what are some key things I should prepare for? And how should I make a good first impression?

[wa****]

Just be yourself don’t be overly pushy cruise the event see how it goes don’t have an expectations other than to meet new people and go from there

[mj****]

First, foremost and most importantly be respectful.

Dont expect much on your first visit, but do socialise, do make connections and do enjoy your time.
Remember, consent is key!

Take note of any dress code requirements. Some events are held In locations where certain types of fetish wear might not be appropriate, or may not be appropriate on the way into the venu.

[typhoon2]

Don't arrive too early. Don't overstay your welcome. Help the organisers where possible, tidying up or helping move kit (bit ask first). Read all joining instructions carefully and adhere to them, seeking clarification if necessary. Don't presume that play or even chat are guaranteed. Don't badger other guests or DM them before the event, but it's acceptable to reach out to the organisers ahead of time. Don't be a wallfrlower but equally don't hog the event. Don't seek out personal details of other attendees - they'll volunteer what they want people to know. Don't drink too much alcohol (even a tipple can cause concerns if it comes to play by people who don't know your tolerance levels). Never attend under the influence  It unnerves people and is a major play risk. Make an effort in dressing (see checking event guidelines above). Good personal grooming is well-received.

[Ba****]

Yes, be comfortable and not pushy. If it is your first event like a munch you are probably being vetted to see if you are a good fit with others in the group. If so, you will be allowed to attend non public events if you fit well.

[da****]

Read and follow the rules, be respectful and if ur unsure just ask. Most importantly enjoy urself and have fun. Most events have dress codes so do follow them and if you are a bit nervous about attending u can message others beforehand or tell the staff and they will be happy to show u around and give u a little brief run down of things.

[jo****]

From a female perspective, it usually takes us hours to prepare. The least guys can do is shower and smell good, breathe mints as if you're a smoker

[ey****]

it's a broad question in the sense of - both generally and specifically, where are you planning on starting?

Like a lot varies by region and there's some regions you can't attend, or sometimes don't even find out about, play events unless you've first been to munches

and in others, almost anyone can buy a ticket and turn up

If you are new/unsure then it's always worth going to munches first - and the high level there is it's causal clothes, casual settings, read any event instructions or rules, if it's your first time consider arriving early for any 'newbie' period or to meet the organiser before it gets too busy (early as in if it runs 7pm-11pm, turn up at 7pm. Not early as in turn up 6.30pm) these are social, an opportunity to make friends, but while conversation can be anything goes, be aware of surroundings and in how appropriate it is to be forward with people you've just met.

 

If of course you are going straight in to attending fetish events should it be permitted.

Read the event rules, instructions and description.

Then read them again.

If any rules or etiquette requirements of that event are not for you, do not attend.

Assume there is no leigh way in any dress code or other pre-requisites.

At fetish events while it IS possible to chat to people and make friends, consider a lot of people are not out to babysit newbies at these and have their own friend circles, and partners they're out with.

Go for the view of having a good time enjoying the event, and not hinging the enjoyment of getting play.  Pick up play can and does happen, but if you go expecting it and it doesn't, then you'll be disappointed.

[StormyBlueEyes]

Most places will have a set of rules, just read and follow them. Try to be at ease and just be yourself. Going in following the rules and doing a little research (such as knowing PRICK — Personal Responsibility, Informed, Consensual Kink) is all you really need.

For bonus points may I suggest:
Leave your judgements behind along with preconceived expectations and instead employ a bit of open honesty, curiosity and the desire to connect, this will set you up to be grounded but open and likely attractive.

Good luck, may you meet likeminded souls

[Deleted Member]

Beautifully put @darlingitsyou 

[Ctsub90]

Be respectful and sober
Dress nice and be polite when talking.
Don't over think it.
Be honest

[TS****]

Wow!! So wow

[Li****]

5 hours ago, StormyBlueEyes said:

Most places will have a set of rules, just read and follow them. Try to be at ease and just be yourself. Going in following the rules and doing a little research (such as knowing PRICK — Personal Responsibility, Informed, Consensual Kink) is all you really need.

For bonus points may I suggest:
Leave your judgements behind along with preconceived expectations and instead employ a bit of open honesty, curiosity and the desire to connect, this will set you up to be grounded but open and likely attractive.

Good luck, may you meet likeminded souls

Thanks, I don’t plan on going to one anytime soon, mainly because there’s no events near me. But I’ll keep that in mind when I’m ready

[br****]

Just be respectful

[Ti****]

Have you tried fetlife? I didn’t think there were many events near me until I got on that app. Now I see events EVERY DAY!🤯🤯🤯

[ge****]

A lot of good advice given already - one thing I would suggest in addition however is consider attending Munches (socials for kinksters) as your first step rather than diving head first into kink events at clubs (which given your age you may be precluded from anyway as many clubs have a 21 and overs policy)
.
At a Munch you get a chance to chat and get to know people socially and once you've established yourself there invites to attend kink/play events may follow and give you someone to go with.
.
That's exactly what happened for me - I started attending my local Munch on a regular basis, was then invited along to go to a club with some of them, and have been attending ever since - has the added benefit of finding friends in *this* world you can freely talk kink things through with.

[Sting-ATL]

Good advice given. Rule
#1 never tough another Dom bag.
#2 don't get too close to a scene or talk to them in a scene.
#3 be respectful.

Last most dungeons have a newbie munch at 6pm or a few hours beforehand. Meet some other newbies and hang out with them. Join Fetlife to find munches and dungeons.

[ey****]

2 hours ago, Sting-ATL said:

#1 never tough another Dom bag.

I mean, never touch anything that doesn't belong to you - be that anyone's gear or body