Popular Post te**** Posted July 9 Popular Post What’s the most exciting element of speaking to a femdom you’re highly attracted to? The attention? Lack there of? Trying to keep your eyes on hers? Or her feet even though you’re dying for a glimpse of her?
Dan8b Posted July 9 The attention definitely, the more attraction the more I crave and the more weak at the knees I become 🤭
Wa**** Posted July 9 Finally giving up the pressure to always have the answer. Feeling like I'm desirable when someone else initiates interaction instead of me always having to start and maintain conversation or physical activities.
TheZMan Posted July 9 If I am simply talking to her, then knowing that she is taking time out of her day to speak with me, to give me her attention. If I am at her feet while talking to her, then it definitely is her feet in my hands and the feelings she is getting from my massages.
Deleted Member Posted July 9 For me its more just security. I've always been really insecure and feel like I tend to *** myself upon women, so I perfer women who are able to put up a bit of resistance if that makes sense
ge**** Posted July 9 (edited) None of the above - it's finding a connection and chemistry along with a level of like-mindedness - without any of those being in place the rest simply would not follow. Also I am neither a slave, nor an inferior - but I am a submissive, which doesn't mean I'm in any way lesser than a dominant, I'm their equal from the other side of the coin - if they think I'm inferior then once again, the rest would not follow. Edited July 9 by gemini_man Additional detail
Ma**** Posted July 9 There is no inferior. Dominants and submissives are equal sides of the same coin. All true BDSM Lovers truly understand, that the submissives really hold the power. It may be that you need to adjust your beliefs and behaviours around that.
se**** Posted July 9 There is no such thing as an inferior. You have to look at this this way, how would you feel if 2 men were doing to you what you and your girlfriend are trying to do to the man? Approach the Dom sub situation with respect or you will not find someone willing to submit.
Th**** Posted July 10 9 hours ago, gemini_man said: None of the above - it's finding a connection and chemistry along with a level of like-mindedness - without any of those being in place the rest simply would not follow. Also I am neither a slave, nor an inferior - but I am a submissive, which doesn't mean I'm in any way lesser than a dominant, I'm their equal from the other side of the coin - if they think I'm inferior then once again, the rest would not follow. This. Submissives are not inferior. Why would anyone want a partnership with someone they didn't see as an equal? It's certainly not a good way to view submissives. Being a Dominant is a responsibility.
Th**** Posted July 10 8 hours ago, ManchesterDom98 said: There is no inferior. Dominants and submissives are equal sides of the same coin. All true BDSM Lovers truly understand, that the submissives really hold the power. It may be that you need to adjust your beliefs and behaviours around that. Most of this is true except for submissives holding the power. The whole point of submitting is giving up power. Giving consent and being able to withdraw consent isn't the same thing.
Ma**** Posted July 10 1 hour ago, ThaliaV said: Most of this is true except for submissives holding the power. The whole point of submitting is giving up power. Giving consent and being able to withdraw consent isn't the same thing. I disagree. I believe it is submissives who do hold the power....you quite rightly mentioned that submitting is giving up power, yes it is, but it is also a transfer of power, a submissive needs to find you worthy of submitting to for you to even be considered a dominant. So, when a submissive does give their power to a dominant, and finds the dominant worthy of submitting too then the dominant never had the power in the first place. The dominant can't demand submission. The point about consent is irrelevant because anyone practicing a bdsm dynamic or even in a vanilla relationship needs to be aware of consent, consent is basic and should be understood by most.
Deleted Member Posted July 10 I like a loving domme who both pegs me and loves my dick I don't want to be wasted as some sort of cuck just because I'm a little subby
ey**** Posted July 10 1 hour ago, ManchesterDom98 said: I disagree. I believe it is submissives who do hold the power....you quite rightly mentioned that submitting is giving up power, yes it is, but it is also a transfer of power, a submissive needs to find you worthy of submitting to for you to even be considered a dominant. So, when a submissive does give their power to a dominant, and finds the dominant worthy of submitting too then the dominant never had the power in the first place. The dominant can't demand submission. The point about consent is irrelevant because anyone practicing a bdsm dynamic or even in a vanilla relationship needs to be aware of consent, consent is basic and should be understood by most. there's a lot of mental gymnasts in there. While some bits is true - the whole "the submissive holds the power" is an old myth that Dominants use to cover up for ***. Like, if you transfer power - you aint holding it. And while in theory you can take it back "at any time" that might be difficult if you're, say, tied down. The other thing of course the old subs can se tlimits, use a safeword, etc etc - these are all tools the Dominant can use at any time. I guess, if subs really are the ones with all the power - why do so many male subs have problems finding a Dominant?
ey**** Posted July 10 14 hours ago, temptaketame said: What’s the most exciting element of speaking to a femdom you’re highly attracted to? The attention? Lack there of? Trying to keep your eyes on hers? Or her feet even though you’re dying for a glimpse of her? I mean.... I think regardless of who you are or your role or dynamic - it's always exciting talking with someone you find attracrive especially when it has the view of leading to something. And if it's someone you kinda knew, someone you think is cool wants to do something *with you* is always nice - i guess a sign you're on the right track
Ma**** Posted July 10 47 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said: there's a lot of mental gymnasts in there. While some bits is true - the whole "the submissive holds the power" is an old myth that Dominants use to cover up for ***. Like, if you transfer power - you aint holding it. And while in theory you can take it back "at any time" that might be difficult if you're, say, tied down. The other thing of course the old subs can se tlimits, use a safeword, etc etc - these are all tools the Dominant can use at any time. I guess, if subs really are the ones with all the power - why do so many male subs have problems finding a Dominant? Yes, indeed there are...you possibly could be one of them. How is that a myth that is used to cover up for ***? A true and honest dom knows and respects submissives and understands that submissives do hold all the power. A dominant can't be a fulfilled and happy dominant without a loyal submissive in their life, so understanding that, is not ***. How the dominant treats a submissive that is the grey area...when dominants start setting rules like "you must tell me where you are and who you are with at all times" that is when it gets abusive, when they mask their *** under rules and the naivety of some submissives. The reason so many male submissives struggle to find a dominant is because most of the time, not all of the time, they approach in the wrong way.
CopperKnob Posted July 10 12 hours ago, ManchesterDom98 said: I disagree. I believe it is submissives who do hold the power....you quite rightly mentioned that submitting is giving up power, yes it is, but it is also a transfer of power, a submissive needs to find you worthy of submitting to for you to even be considered a dominant. So, when a submissive does give their power to a dominant, and finds the dominant worthy of submitting too then the dominant never had the power in the first place. The dominant can't demand submission. The point about consent is irrelevant because anyone practicing a bdsm dynamic or even in a vanilla relationship needs to be aware of consent, consent is basic and should be understood by most. That's a very narrow viewpoint. If there was ever a D that thought that they couldn't safeword, couldn't end a scene, couldn't end a relationship etc, etc, then I would not only question their understanding of D/s but also their understanding of the basic tenets of consent regardless as to how verbose their written account of it may be.
Ma**** Posted July 10 14 minutes ago, CopperKnob said: That's a very narrow viewpoint. If there was ever a D that thought that they couldn't safeword, couldn't end a scene, couldn't end a relationship etc, etc, then I would not only question their understanding of D/s but also their understanding of the basic tenets of consent regardless as to how verbose their written account of it may be. I never mentioned a Dominant not being able to safe word or withdraw. This was about the submissives holding the power, not what the Dominant is or is not able to do.
Ma**** Posted July 10 16 minutes ago, CopperKnob said: That's a very narrow viewpoint. If there was ever a D that thought that they couldn't safeword, couldn't end a scene, couldn't end a relationship etc, etc, then I would not only question their understanding of D/s but also their understanding of the basic tenets of consent regardless as to how verbose their written account of it may be. Consent is very basic, you either give consent or you don't. Once consent has been given it can me immediately withdraw once the submissive feels uncomfortable or unsafe and the scene will stop.
CopperKnob Posted July 10 7 minutes ago, ManchesterDom98 said: I never mentioned a Dominant not being able to safe word or withdraw. This was about the submissives holding the power, not what the Dominant is or is not able to do. You claimed that an s had all the power. If the D can action all of that are they totally powerless?
CopperKnob Posted July 10 6 minutes ago, ManchesterDom98 said: Consent is very basic, you either give consent or you don't. Once consent has been given it can me immediately withdraw once the submissive feels uncomfortable or unsafe and the scene will stop. If consent were that basic we'd see many more people being convicted of SA/r@pe and yet...
Th**** Posted July 10 Just now, ManchesterDom98 said: Consent is very basic, you either give consent or you don't. Once consent has been given it can me immediately withdraw once the submissive feels uncomfortable or unsafe and the scene will stop. You're missing @CopperKnob point. *All* parties must consent and have the ability to withdraw consent. It's not something specific to a submissive. The whole "the sub holds the power" stuff is nonsense. *Nobody* has power over the other until it's been agreed upon. (Outside of potential societal power imbalances but that's not the topic of discussion so i'm not going into that here.) A Dominant is still a dominant outside of a dynamic same as a sub is a sub but they aren't Dominant or submissive to each other outside of a dynamic.
Ma**** Posted July 10 11 minutes ago, CopperKnob said: You claimed that an s had all the power. If the D can action all of that are they totally powerless? Again specific to my point. My point was solely based on the submissives, not on what the dominant can or can't do. Obviously if the dominant feels unsafe, insecure or if the submissive asks them to participate in something that is one of their limits. The dominant can withdraw too as is not completely powerless but a dominant is powerless without a submissive. My whole and sole point was based on the Submissives holding the power. There are two roles, dominat and submissive, my point was subjectively focused on Submissives.
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