Jump to content

Rules, Tasks, and Protocols


Recommended Posts

Typically rules guide what you can and cannot do. Tasks are considered like missions or quests and to be achieved. Protocols are guidance on how to handle situations or circumstances.
Protocols to me would be don't be out at night alone
Rules would be like be in by 11 or bed time is 11 type thing
Tasks would be like chores your given
To speak with with the wisdom of the startrek ferengy: a contract is a contract as long you want the contract to get fulfilled. If you don't like it break it. Make much profit out of it as you can. With my words forget written rules, life is dynamic, when it works it is fine, if not change the parameters.
Rules are to be followed tasks are to be completed and protocols are to be executed when the former are not followed
when I do a task it includes three elements - 1.[what needs to be done in detail (the protocol), 2.the timeline in which you are to do it and 3. the penalty/reward . The penalty/reward needs to be communicated upfront so the sub knows what’s going to happen if they do or do not do the task.

rules are things that need to happen all of the time. One of my rules is that my honorific needs to be capitalized in any written communication. Rules need to have consequences as well for not following a rule. You can keep track of all of the rule ***s and then provide the consequences during the scene.

To me, tasks are considered a one time events (of course you can do them more than once if you’d like but it’s still one event). You can do a task within a scene or you can ask someone to do a task outside of scene

The protocols are how you are going to do things.
Consider reading The Leatherman’s Protocol Handbook, by John Weal. This is old guard protocol, etiquette and rules - but it is part of our roots. It discusses the differences between protocol, rules, etiquette and service. It may help you in this.
4 hours ago, xmoon_shadowx said:

Can someone give me a good explanation of what the difference is between rules, tasks, and protocols?

I am a 24/7 collared service sub

So, yes, but - this is the type of thing which should have been drawn up and discussed BEFORE you became 24/7

Otherwise there are a lot of good examples in this thread - but there's also a lot of overlap.

But; 

Tasks can be ad hoc or regular.  "Go to the shop and pick up the groceries" is a task.  As is "Each morning run me a bath, and when I get out of the bathroom I want fresh clothes ready to put on and breakfast served downstairs"

These don't have to be the tasks in your dynamic at all, merely examples

Rules - like every relationship has rules but in most cases it is "this is what I constitute as cheating, this is how we agree to run the household" and there's no "punishment" for failure to adhere, but a likely relationship breakdown.  Some people in kink do have "punishments" for breaking rules and these are something to be discussed and agreed - this could be an agreement for failing to complete a reasonable task, or for behaviour outside of protocol.

Protocol is more ritualistic, these are the things you do regularly - this can include using a title for the other person, wearing a collar, so on.  It is worth googling protocols in kink to see which ones are right for your dynamic

But realistic speaking as I say, these are things to be outlined so you can work towards 24/7 - this isn't a starting point.   Cos like, what do you do here if your Dominant lays down a bunch of rules or expectations which aint gonna work for you? What makes your current situation "24/7"

Rules are guidelines that are to be followed no matter the condition of circumstances, they operate outside of circumstances. Tasks are goals to be fulfilled and/or achieved generally with the rules in mind as they are as previously stated unconditional. Protocols are defined reactions and/or procedures and are generally implemented during specific conditions and/or circumstances, again under the supervision of the rules previously established.
In the 5 year D/s LTR as the Dom rules were the big guidelines. Protocols were more how she was supposed to do common things. Tasks are specific requests or assignments.

If you have questions talk with your Dom. It’s his responsibility to provide you the framework. Your responsibility to act within it.
2 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

So, yes, but - this is the type of thing which should have been drawn up and discussed BEFORE you became 24/7

Otherwise there are a lot of good examples in this thread - but there's also a lot of overlap.

But; 

Tasks can be ad hoc or regular.  "Go to the shop and pick up the groceries" is a task.  As is "Each morning run me a bath, and when I get out of the bathroom I want fresh clothes ready to put on and breakfast served downstairs"

These don't have to be the tasks in your dynamic at all, merely examples

Rules - like every relationship has rules but in most cases it is "this is what I constitute as cheating, this is how we agree to run the household" and there's no "punishment" for failure to adhere, but a likely relationship breakdown.  Some people in kink do have "punishments" for breaking rules and these are something to be discussed and agreed - this could be an agreement for failing to complete a reasonable task, or for behaviour outside of protocol.

Protocol is more ritualistic, these are the things you do regularly - this can include using a title for the other person, wearing a collar, so on.  It is worth googling protocols in kink to see which ones are right for your dynamic

But realistic speaking as I say, these are things to be outlined so you can work towards 24/7 - this isn't a starting point.   Cos like, what do you do here if your Dominant lays down a bunch of rules or expectations which aint gonna work for you? What makes your current situation "24/7"

We have had a structured dynamic via verbal agreement prior to being collared. We are just now putting things down on paper. I am permanently collared in a perpetual power exchange. Our dynamic is not scene-based, but permeates all aspects of our relationship at all times.

There are a lot of great perspectives here. Here's another way to think of it:

Rules: "You will do this, and I will do that; and we will do this other thing. We will negotiate prior to changes; ***s are subject to punitive action on *either* end, and not the fun kind."

Protocols: "You will do these things in this specific way; I will respond in this particular way; and we will recognize this as our special assortment of interactions."

Tasks: "You will do this for my pleasure and amusement. I will issue these to you to give you the service dopamine hit you're craving. We will both feel good from your completion of tasks."
Rules and protocols can have little to no overlap or have an extremely high degree of overlap like say a rule is be in bed by 10pm but you have to wait to get into bed for you’re owner to lay down first as a protocol you have to sometimes figure out what is more important to do follow the rule or follow the protocol and task are simple everyday or every week things like take out the trash and recyclables to dusting the home there can be fun task in there it depends on the dynamics in the relationship because every relationship is different it is hard to give a good example as to
What might fit yours but I hope this has helped even just a little bit
Rules are what not to do
Tasks are what you need to accomplish now
Protocol is how things should go normally
Protocols within some sections of the community are long established general “rules” such as certain submissive positions. Some people have a dynamic that takes these literally, often referred to as high protocol dynamic.
In most cases the high protocol dynamic is adapted with some removed or changed, to suit the concerned parties these then become the rules of that dynamic.
Tasks are given as a way of educating the submissive within the rules, or maybe to just keep them focussed on the dynamic. They can also be given as a fun thing to do.
There is scope for possible conflicts between protocols and rules, and also between more than one rule.
But in the end it is all down to what the people in the dynamic want to achieve and have agreed to. Don’t get to hooked up on the meanings do what is right for you and your dynamic
For me: rules are meant to be broken for disciplinary play but should be followed most of the time. Tasks are exactly that, short specific "things" that are to be accomplished. Protocols are guidelines meant to definine the relationship and dynamic and should only be changed when both parties discuss the change like "normies," i.e., outside of the dynamic so there's no misinterpretation of someone's feelings or expectations.
You have gotten some great feedback so far, well done gentlemen. 👏 I wanted to call out the way that people have been interpreting "rules" differently. Some dynamics use rules as a way to establish boundaries of what should and should not be done. Others use "rules" 😉 as a way of giving the submissive a way to express their own needs. You need to be spanked? Break a rule.

The thing that is missing from your discussion, which I would recommend adding, are limits. These are the things that you both agree will never happen in a scene or in your dynamic. A well negotiated set of limits that is honored by both parties helps build trust and creates a safe space to explore this kind of play. For example, one of your limits could be "no group play" or "nothing unlawful ever." They are yours to set but you should both have equal input on that list, but ultimately they are to allow the sub to feel safe and sink into deeper levels of submissiveness.
Too many long responses. Put simply…Rules are predetermined and agreed boundaries. Tasks are instructions to be followed or criteria completed, and protocols are just the expected and accepted forms of conduct and behaviour, especially when complying with a task, which should be completed within the rules.
From a slave contract perspective..
Rules: these are expectations and general responsibilities of each parties actions (Yes both sides of the slash in a contract should have rules) rules are constant unless a clause stipulates otherwise. The rules you create for eachother should not be things that are broken without dire consequences. I.E. if you have a rule that stipulates you should send NSFW materials to other people, then it should not be broken without first asking your partner. These are supposed to be conditions required to sustain the contract.

Tasks: these can be outlined in the contract briefly, but I would advise against having lengthy sections detailing the types of tasks you may be required to do. Contractual tasks that must be done by either party on a routine basis, everything else can be either summarized in the contract as “potential tasks” but keep them brief, that is what pre scene negotiation is for. If you have things that you will not do, put those in the contract to cement them in writing.

Protocol: this can be outlined in the contract, but again I recommend only summary outlines of the protocol levels expected in the dynamic, and what they are represented by. Protocol is very similar to rules, except it is the schema for interaction with eachother. This is something that is generally trained into the dynamic, so it is expected to grow and evolve over time, when this happens summarize the changes in the next contract review period.

Contracts are not meant to be burdensome, but feel like the natural practice of the dynamic, written down.
Rules set the frame,
tasks play the game,
protocols show how,
go and try it now.
  • 2 weeks later...
It seems as if most responses are being specific to the sub. Fact is the Dom has rules, tasks, and protocols also.

Most of the explanations are correct but both have them not just subbie do this. The Dom should have them also.
×
×
  • Create New...