What Makes Free-Use Dynamics Thrive in Trusting D/s Bonds?

[Fe****]

I'm musing on free-use dynamics in trusting D/s relationships and exploring how mutual consent and clear boundaries create intense, fulfilling connections. For me, it’s about a submissive partner thriving in a safe, cherished space where our respective needs and desires are met throughout the day, on a daily basis. But want to hear from the community. What draws a sub to free use? How do you balance trust, safety, and passion? Is it challenging or does it come naturally? I’m all ears for thoughtful perspectives on building authentic connections. #FreeUse #D/s #Consent

[da****]

For me, it's about not being too selfish with the climaxes, make sure you're sub isn't getting tuned on and then left uncomfortable for too long (sometimes it's fun) but repeatedly ignoring their pleasure creates distrust and resentment. In me anyway 🤪

[Re****]

I feel for that dynamic is has to be trust and passion ,lust, if your not being turned on by your partner at the thought or presence of your partner this dynamic would be hard to keep her wet and not uncomfortable as Danc1 said 😘

[Deleted Member]

I’m a sub that hates free use. IN MY experience it’s doms who are lazy and lacking in attunement and have a sense of entitlement over a subs body. Little regard for the subs needs, pleasure or arousal. So a dom who wanted a free use dynamic would repel me rather than attract me.

[Deleted Member]

5 hours ago, SoMakeMe said:

I’m a sub that hates free use. IN MY experience it’s doms who are lazy and lacking in attunement and have a sense of entitlement over a subs body. Little regard for the subs needs, pleasure or arousal. So a dom who wanted a free use dynamic would repel me rather than attract me.

And just to add to that. Maybe I’ve just had bad experiences but I just can’t see how that would feel good, or work, not with my own arousal system which takes time to warm up and sometimes the last thing I want is sex. I’d feel ‘taken from’, violated and like an ‘object’ and not a woman with feelings, wants and needs. That might float some people’s boats but definitely not mine.

[Deleted Member]

I'd be really interested to hear from someone who is free use. I'd feel the same as SoMakeMe (even though being treated like an object some of the time is fine with me). It would be ok for a weekend. Maybe a Saturday afternoon. 😆

[jo****]

Subs like to experience release in my experience. I'm a Dom. They like a Dom that knows their body.

As a Dom I have been exploring ways to tease subs now for about 40 years off and on. Yes, I had two subs as a youngster...so the three of us learned together.

My own personal kink is ***d multiple orgasms. I have been doing CNC for several decades before it was called CNC.

I think it's about trust and safety.

[2G****]

Ok so as a sub who is turned on by the idea of free use...... I'm my vanilla life there is a lot of trauma and was even to the point that my ex husband made me feel repulsive. With that being said, I crave that passion. That feeling that He is watching me as I wash dishes or do a house chore. Instead of looking over at Him and he's all in his phone or something. That thought that this Man wants me. He is turned on by me just doing this chore. That he can't wait to put his hands on me or f**k me is arousing. It makes me feel desired, wanted, cherished. I can see how it would make others feel used. But that's what it is to me. I want to be that one that you will crave when you wake up at 3a.m. with a boner and slide up in me. Instead of waking up and finding you jacking off in the bathroom. And I can understand why most won't it can't see that because in order for me to even consider the topic I had to go thru what I did and feel completely repulsive, unwanted l, ugly, whatever you want to call in order to appreciate what that meant or how it could make me feel beautiful again.