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The Most Defining Moment of Your Kink Journey


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What is the one moment in your journey that taught you the most, both is a positive way and a negative.
Getting a gun pulled on me at the place I went to meet a date. Now I only meet in public. And good. I learned that even a Dom can take some punishment and it feels right.
In a positive way, and despite having held an interest for as long as I can remember and experiences going back to my 30s - the most defining moment was when I joined a local Munch two years ago (at the tender age of 58) and from there both my network of people I know within this world, and my experiences increased massively - I started going to clubs, I built a circle of friends and so much more - it also made me realise that hanging around sites like this waiting for something to happen is a pointless and fruitless task.
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From a negative perspective, it was the realisation that you need to be careful what you are comfortable with as a recent experience of me allowing something to happen, led to a lot of heartache.
When I was tenderly making love to my wife hand on her neck in that sensual kinda way and she straight up says "Can you like squeeze and *** me and fuck me hard like a dirty slut instead of being tender." Life changing! That and sitting down and reading some of her favorite books, understanding the things I could embody from the characters and how the dynamics were enthralling more than the acts. Embracing that and trying to personify it in our kinks.
Truly just taking a leap and giving myself permission to explore. Just booked a play convection and even if I just observe others, I deserve to learn about my desires instead of suppressing them.
When it really jumped? When my friend of decades called me a piece of shit when I came out to her as a Dom. I was trying to explain why I was traveling to meet someone. I was excited so I shared that with her. She called me a piece of shit ***r.

From here on out no one gets to know.
One of my first relationships. The first that being naked was not only ok, but fun! I saw my girlfriend at the time get up from the bed, just after sex. She got up with no covering just baked and free and she had the most beautiful round bottom I had ever seen. That lead me down a journey of excitement and feeling.
When my first proper dominant (lower case because he was a covert narcissist masquerading under the kink umbrella) broke every rule he wrote down for us and abandoned me, while blaming me, while seeing someone else. I put people through the wringer now just to be my friend. I will never be in that situation again. He also showed me that my desire to serve and please could let myself be pushed beyond my own limits. That is no longer the case.
Going from clit to balls and the delicious stuff inbetween.
I was working at my glass factory after my wifes death. A friend that I knew was a dom was sitting in the breakroom. I asked him if it was normal to get intense pleasure from my wife clawing my back was normal or was I sick in the head. He laughed and said no your just kinky.
  • 3 weeks later...
My late partner trained me to accept then love then crave BDSM playtime. It took two years of patience on his part to train me to cum from intense prolonged nipple play while I was tied up In that moment I knew I would on my knees begging for more if I could then knew I was truly submissive and was grateful for such a beautiful and frightening moment. I knew I wanted a different life from that moment on. I wanted needed to be his sub then slave. Nothing else mattered. He knew too. He collared me the next day. We had almost ten years in M/s 24/7. That moment changed my entire life and career goals. I never regretted it. I’d found my calling.
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