I want to relinquish control, please.

[55s]

As with most people, my sexuality is a very large part of my life and my identity. I love erotica, and the sexual and emotional energy produced when desire is made manifest. 

I’ve always been interested in the power dynamics in relationships, specifically in erotic play, and the acts of domination and being dominated appeal to me. 

A little about me, I’m a highly intelligent autist, specifically I exhibit high functioning Asperger, and I’ve never been comfortable in conventional social situations, particularly ones involving romance or sex. I don’t know the rules, since these interactions tend to be inherently chaotic, so I typically avoid them. That being said, I feel most comfortable when I know the role I’m to play in a social interaction, and even more comfortable when someone else takes the lead, and gives me obvious ques I can easily follow and obey. 

I’ve always felt good in situations when someone else has control of the environment I’m in, and when they're taking actions that will make both of us feel good. 

I’m interested in finding a partner, not necessarily a romantic or sexual one, who would take pleasure in dominating me. I don’t have much experience with BDSM, but it appeals to my kinks, and I like the idea of someone else being in charge of me, since it removes the uncertainty and anxiety I typically feel in interpersonal interactions. 

The idea of relinquishing control to someone who will make the calls for me makes me feel safe and comfortable, and is very appealing, and it's something I want to pursue. 

Does anyone have any advice for manifesting this? 

Or generally any input on what kind of things might appeal to me in a fetish contest? 

Thanks, and cheers.