My fiance is so strict story

[Subman86]

I'm at my fiance on a dating website and after a few months of dating we talked about having an flr she was already dominating me anyway so we were more both of us were more than happy to make that step. The problem is my fiance have taken it to the extreme. I love her bossy bitchy demeanor but I'm also scared by it sometimes so I was hoping to get a advice I love her very much and sometimes her being a dominating woman. but other times I I feel threatened that she'd 100% take over my life. Here are a few examples before you reply marry her or break up with her I would definitely like some detailed advice.

 

1) the day after we got engaged she told me to put all *** in her account because no we just became engaged and her mind we were married I happily did it and I get a weekly allowance and I have no credit card. I get a strict $20 allowance and if I have to anything outside of the $20 I have to ask for permission I don't really mind but she said when we have kids that will drop anywhere from $5 to $10 weekly.

 

2) she told me that she likes surprises but she also if I ever want to marry her I have to tell her beforehand so I took her to a restaurant and I got on one knee and I proposed. she said yes and everyone in the restaurant clapped. However when we got to the car it was a 45-minute drive. She proceeded to yell at me for the whole way home and put the ring in back in the case and told me to try again. when I told her we already called my family she said I don't care you will try again. A few months later I told her I was going to ask her for dinner and I was going to propose she agreed and she appreciated I told her beforehand. Got to the restaurant and she told me not yet not yet then finally she said proposed now I got down on one knee and I proposed and she said yes and everyone cheered for her she proceeded to act shocked and cry and told her mom he totally surprised me on the phone. And her mom replied you didn't make him tell you beforehand to wish she replied what did I just have to act shocked. 

 

3)One night I want to sex so I set open your legs to which she proceeded to chew me out and bitch me out. And said that was unacceptable and I wouldn't have sex until I forgot what pussy felt like. About a month later we started kissing again and I asked her please open your legs and then we have sex and I told her thank you after she said I'm your goddess if you don't please thank you and kiss me on the cheek afterwards you're doing it wrong. During the month I was banned from having sex with her I had to sleep downstairs because and I quote I don't want you to be on top of me in the middle of the night. Whenever she got off because of her toy I could hear it. 

 

My fiance doesn't have kids nor does she want them and told me if I go through the I agree to get a vasectomy within 24 hours After our honeymoon I have to wear condoms until I get a vasectomy and I get the 30-day sperm check to make sure my sperm hit zero and then I have condomless with sex.

 

We went to a strip club and I was told keep my eyes on her. I didn't find out till later that she paid her stripper to come and grind on Me and I couldn't break eye contact which I did not. 

 

My wife picks my friends one of her friends is also extremely dominant towards her husband and I was told if I ever want to put it in her again I have to let her pick my friends she doesn't like many of my friends she only lets me hang out with two to three while I hang out what the guys and she hangs out with the wife.

 

She najes makes me tell her friends I'm not good in bed I come within 5 minutes and I'm a smaller guy she routinely makes me tell them I don't satisfy her needs. 

 

Every single time we have had sex I have had to put on a condom whether we were drunk whether I always had to put one on she told me it was to protect herself from me.

 

All porn and nudity is any nudity I have to look down we were at a movie in the theater and I had to look down and chill till she said it was okay all pornography is banned she has a basically a camera on my laptop. laptop if anything comes up on my laptop I have to screenshot it and send it to her OneDrive. If any of my friends back home wants to show me a picture of any female. I have to show it to her ask for permission and she'll want me to see it. I cannot tell you the last time I looked at any pornography and she told me I'll probably never see another set of naked tits that aren't hers as long as we're married.

 

I have to sign a prenup that she keeps control of all *** and everything is in her name. I have not seen how much I made for my job in a while in between her *** and my *** everything is paid. In the engagement prenup I had to agree to the prenup. I hope no accounts of my name and I'm not even on the lease car insurance card now electricity phone bill. when some door-to-door salesmen knocked on her door and asked for the head of household I had to get my fiancee because my fiancee s the head of the household. None of the bills we have even had my name on it. There is nothing she pays that even remotely has my name. One time she came home wearing a expensive purse and told all her friends I bought it for her posted on Facebook and Instagram how I spoil my Prince spoils his princess and she can't believe the surprised when she walked in the door. Christmas shopping she knows everything when I purchase at the counter because again with my $20 allowance I have to ask for anything other team I asked to or something and she'll tell me the right size color etc. But whenever she opens it she'll act shocked and post a reaction online. Some of her friends know of this behavior but not the extent of it so when she gets a gift the next shot they  believe I bought it for her.

 

 She said I'm a whipped pussy and if I even raise my voice a little bit she puts my finger in my face and will yell at me even if I get mad I have to calm down before I speak to her. Because even raising my voice a little bit is not acceptable. 

 

I'm not allowed anything sexual without her or without her permission because my cum is hers. We did it recently we start chastity. For the first 6 months I went dry to teach me a lesson of respect and humility. In the first 10 months I've had three orgasms. And like I said sex is please afterwards and thank you and a kiss on the cheek. No masturbating or porn in 2020.

 

I went pretty detailed I can also look at more however she could gorgeous female with no fat and she has a pretty successful YouTube account. I never been in any other videos nor do I want to they are of non-sexual nature. So when you see her on YouTube you think nothing of her but when the cameras off she quite domineering and controlling. I have been told this is the rest of my life and if I don't like it I can leave but I love her very much and I do want to marry her please give me all your opinions that you have

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[ey****]

what you've described would probably be a wonderful fantasy for some people - but it sounds like you're not happy with the reality.

There is stuff in here you need to resolve.

So, this is what you need to do.

You need to go through the kinda thing she does or controls and work out what you are happy with and what you are not OK with.

And you need to have a serious talk before you either get married (and get stuck in a situation you're really not happy with) or break it up (and find that this is stuff she thought you wanted)

It could be, for example, to end the FLR element and just continue as a 'normal' couple with elements of kink - or discuss how you can change direction and reach a situation you are both happy with.

One of three things will happen.

Number 1 - she will completely agree and tone things right down and you can continue as happy as you were

Number 2 - she was completely disagree (or, agree to bits and not change) and say it's this way or not at all - at which point I'd certainly consider ending things because it's not getting any better

Number 3 - she might partially agree.  And with this is it's a case of if you're willing to meet or try her compromise or not.

 

[Benlogan-8510]

Sounds a bit extreme. Either you’re happy being treated that way, or you’re not. Set your boundaries. If she doesn’t respect them, it’s time to go. I know everyone has different levels of comfort, but for me, the day to day ‘vanilla’ part of life needs to be very much a partnership, while the dom/sub is fantasy/play time.

[Subystantial]

 

This is just my personal view but i think its important that you both feel respected and if this is not the case, i.e it's a preference of yours, then it seems reasonable that you at least have some way to set your limits as Ben mentioned. Have you at any point negotiated the details of your arrangement Subman86?

Edited January 4, 2021 by Subystantial
grammar

[Subman86]

19 minutes ago, Subystantial said:

 

This is just my personal view but i think its important that you both feel respected and if this is not the case, i.e it's a preference of yours, then it seems reasonable that you at least have some way to set your limits as Ben mentioned. Have you at any point negotiated the details of your arrangement Subman86?

When we started but haven't talked more about it 

 

[Subystantial]

How do you imagine the conversation will go when you bring up your concerns with her?

[Rossco]

To be honest the simple fact that your on here talking about if this is ok then should be one helm of a red flag saying that’s not ! Just because you’re submissive does not mean you give up all you’re rights, this is supposed to be a sexual & mentally fun game for both partners & seriously doesn’t sound like what’s going on ! If the genders were swapped & a male was dictating a females life like this everyone would be going mad telling you to leave & call the police. She seems insanely controlling & you need to explain that although you enjoy the flr relationship you still have rights and freedom

[A_Switch]

When I first read this post I thought it was a fantasy story, but I will assume otherwise.
In my opinion this is extreme and she wants to 247 control every single aspect of your life. The kinky life style has its limits and it can't be that extreme. Just like play there are safe words to be used and if you want to have a relationship with such a person then you need to be able to speak and have your vanilla time as well as the dom/sub time. It can't be this way.
I can see that you are in a difficult situation, you are probably not satisfied and I think you are in trouble.
You need to plan your exist from this toxic situation. In my opinion exit and not adjustments.
But to move forward I would like you to ask yourself the following:
1-If you bring up any discussion regarding changing of the situation and have some level of freedom and not the current 100% slave situation, what would be her reaction? And are you even allowed, in her point of view, to bring this discussion up?
2-Never ever make a permanent change to your self (vasectomy)
3- I wonder if she has sex with other partners, cuckolding you or perhaps he inclination is towards women and that's why she is not interested in having sex.
4-Your financial situation, can you have your own bank account and your own salary deposited in it or will all hell break loose from just bringing this topic up?
5-Are you brainwashed by her current beauty and physique, because it will not last for other 5-10 years. Age will catch up with all and especially women. Check Chalize Theron and her current situation.
6-What if she ends this whole relationship, are you going to be a bankrupt sub?

Man I am concerned about this situation and the probable brainwashing that women can do but again I see this extreme and toxic just like the other comments.

[Deleted Member]

Oh my gosh I'm so sorry you're going through this 😲

[Deleted Member]

https://images.app.goo.gl/wRs5pPT3SFH8nxJt6
Here you go the key elements of bdsm & *** 🤗