Using Fet behind a partners back

[Deleted Member]

It’s wrong.

[Sk****]

Dump them yesterday.

[La****]

If someone is in a monogamous relationship, this would risk hurting their partner’s feelings - even if they’re cheating too (two wrongs…). If someone is in a non-monogamous relationship and all parties have explicitly agreed that outside relationships need not be disclosed, then that might be ok, however, still likely to hurt feelings unless they’ve asked you to do that or want you to. There are various scenarios that your question might relate to, and no one answer. And the matter need not be viewed in binary terms as others seem to suggest below.

For a community of zero judgement on lifestyles it is amazing how many people on here have jumped to conclusions and judged you personally despite your inquiry not definitively saying it was you that you are inquiring about. This community needs to grow and do better than that.

[JD****]

Couldn't organize a root in a brothel on this dead app..... I wouldn't worry one bit.

[mn****]

why is this app any different than any other app for dating? if you break down your question generally speaking “thoughts on a partner using dating apps behind the other partners back” and that essentially is it. just because this app has a specific serial of fetishes and kink, doesn’t take away the generality of what is happening.

just my 2¢

[Ni****]

I don't fu@k with cheaters
If I engage with you and find out you're cheating, I'm done.

I have way too much self respect to spend any time with a cheater.

[Ol****]

I don't understand why you need to go behind her back. I have had two open swinging relationships. You really need to communicate

[Da****]

I have overland 477 requests from married Mr n why so u get together with a women who can’t satisfy you and then expect somebody to be second I don’t get it. I’m exhausted with the married men and the fake profiles. I tell them I’ll find out, but they don’t believe me.

[Ba****]

Well if their openly nonexclusive then it doesn’t have to be a problem

But in most above mentioned and all other intimate relationships it’s at least a breach of trust

[Mr****]

Anything “behind the back” or obfu***ed is cheater and is wrong.

[sh****]

I wouldn’t recommend being in a relationship and having this app without them knowing or consenting.
I’m not judging you, but would strongly advise against it.
Could be a rage bait post, I’m unsure. You’ll always do what you want. It won’t matter what other members say, that’s of course if you’re asking the question with you being the epicentre.

[Az****]

🚫🚫🚫

[bo****]

You need to change your username.

[Mo****]

However, sad this may, just make sure you find someone that is ok with that. Fet is one of those places where you can ask for exactly what you want and be transparent. I've come across lots of people with affair kinks.

Because it's not my thing, I don't explore their reasons.

From a relationship standpoint, cheating is cheating. This is simply a different spin on old thread.

There are plenty of non single people here that look, flirt, obsess, and never make a move.
But if you're capable of action, you're accustomed to cheating and if really makes no difference how or where.

[sa****]

Disappointed

[de****]

Cheating

[sa****]

Yup just found my husband on here … only reason why i downloaded the app seen it on his phone came across his profile

[wp****]

They are not a partner if you use it without them knowing. You are solo

[de****]

That’s right playboy . They’ve already become a waste of space to their partner bc they declare those selves solo

[ba****]

just break up it’s not that hard, omfg

[ju****]

Awful partner worse sub how can you promise trust and loyalty if you can’t eve be loyal to your relationship partner… big red flag

[Ja****]

As you've already seen, cheating is especially frowned on in the lifestyle, because it depends so heavily on honesty and communication. Cheating is never okay regardless, but you'd get a lot less pushback about it on Tinder than you would in a community like this where you're actually likely to get blacklisted if you're a cheater.

[Ro****]

I totally get that the *** of judgment is real—kink is deeply personal and being *** with a partner is scary. But in this community, informed consent is everything.
If you can’t talk to your partner about being on Fet, most healthy poly/ENM people will pass on you. They see secrecy as a safety risk; if you can't be honest with your primary partner, it's hard to trust you’ll be honest about boundaries or risks in a scene. Trust and communication are the foundation here—without them, it isn’t a lifestyle choice, it’s just a betrayal of trust.

[Deleted Member]

Cheating..point blank and simple

[sz****]

Thats a breach of trust, and shouldn't be encouraged