Jump to content

What is the difference between kink and BDSM? Can you have one without the other?


DaDicktater

Recommended Posts

DaDicktater
Posted

Kink would be the things that are "different"  than the socially normal sexual situations. Whereas BDSM specifically is looking for that Dominant/submissive Sado/Maso relationship. You could definitely have  one without the other. 

My favorite thing in bed is fellatio, but to the degree of whatever it takes to please my partner. I dont think that requires D/s to enjoy that kink. Wax play, spanking, etc. I think you can enjoy a lot of the kinks without having the D/s relationship. 

I think the D/s relationship brings another layer though. Something bigger and better. Like the cherry on top.

Posted

That is a very open question, and it has a lot of possible answers...
My interpretation however that kink or fetish is about specific acts or materials etc. Where as BDSM is more about Dynamics between 2 or more people through power exchange

Posted

I think kink is anything a bit sexually freaky. I would say kink is the opposite of vanilla. Its a very generic catch all label though.
BDSM seems a little more specific to me

All BDSM to me is kinky. Not all that is kinky is BDSM.

Also, BDSM in whatever combination you choose BD DS SM is a kink in its own right, just like all the other awesome varieties of kink here.

Ultimately though, they're all just useful words to describe the indescribable. The freaky shit that gets you off.

Posted

Kink
Fetish
BDSM

All 3 things which should have their own circles on a venn diagram.  There is often a lot of overlap - but you can have 1 (or 2) without the other 2 (or 1) or you can have all 3.

So - for example
you enjoy spanking but just for fun = kink

you are turned on by feet = fetish

you have a relationship with your partner where one is in total control to the point of having final say in decisions, and possibly even dictating what you wear or eat or what you do = D/s

OK

You are aroused by feet. You like it when your partner rewards you by letting you worship their feet (D/s and Fetish - possibly also kink)

Your partner makes you kiss her feet, but this is more ritual than arousing (D/s and kink)

You enjoy being spanked, for fun, by a leather strap - but it has to be leather (kink and fetish)

Posted

Personally I see bdsm as a deeper level, using kink and fetish as tools to rein*** the power exchange of a relationship. Shibari rope bunny/ tigger partners could be a very different dynamic to a DS relationship where being bound could be a form of punishment

Posted

It all depends where you draw the line between kink and bdsm if the kink just revolves around sex but with toys then one of you is more likely to be a bottom and the other partner a top but if it’s all about discipline then one is a spanker and the other a spankee and next if you do both you are more likely to be Dominant and submissive unless of course in any of the afore mentioned you swap roles and then you are both switches! Confused? I know I am lol.

Posted

Well Dominance and submission are a mind set and a role a person takes on and have nothing to do with sex .
Kinks are the things that a person is turned on by and also can or cannot be things that have nothing to do with sex . Baloon popping is a kink but nothing to do with sex but it can be done within the Dom/sub dynamic. BDSM
B ondage
D omination
S ubmission / Sadism
M asochism

It is a massive world and open to so much interpretation and that's what's so wonderful about this lifestyle .

You cherry pick the parts you love .

Raven.

×
×
  • Create New...