Non bdsm profikes

[ho****]

7 minutes ago, someging3r said:

Try 50 years my senior when I first got to explore that. I do get your point though, but I think your average person thinks of BDSM, d/s, maybe furries when they think of a kink or fetish. As far as breast feeding, I might hate it? Idk. Just something I want to try once.

I get what your saying. But a decent amount of the "oddball" (for lack of a better term) kinks and fetishes people have can still fit under the BDSM umbrella because even something like ANR can have a power exchange element to it. Not everyone does that stuff for power but there are plenty of people who like the vulnerability/control aspect of why it turns them on or brings them to that state. Its upto each person in the experience. Hope you get a chance to explore it.

[pc****]

So far I’ve only seen one person who was genuinely interesting but just not my type and scammers and OF creators looking for subs.. Seems to be just another *** grab like any other dating app IMO.

[ar****]

This app is trash. That's why. So why not let it get worse and take itself out.

[ar****]

2 hours ago, pcnoob said:

So far I’ve only seen one person who was genuinely interesting but just not my type and scammers and OF creators looking for subs.. Seems to be just another *** grab like any other dating app IMO.

I 100 percent agree with you.

[UK****]

I think there are a few factors at play.  Firstly this is a kink site, not just a bdsm site.

Also, If you think being adventurous sexually is kinky, then you can be fairly vanilla but still want to explore further sexually.

For example, many would consider FFM/MMF etc to be kinky or even many who would consider anal sex as kinky.

There are many people in my experience who have come to broader kink from an increased sexual exploration.  Being more open as a community, we allow and encourage the discussion of our desires.  Equally, we show good frameworks for consent, safety and safe words which allow people to feel they can explore beyond vanilla.

[ka****]

If your talking about me. I'm a bit shy to tell mine because not alot of people I find attractive go for it....

[PresentisPeculiar]

I'm also curious why a straight vanilla profile is ever on here, but most of those are bots .

As to the criticism of the women on this app has been great for me. I've met some great people . Telling a new person you are going to brutalize them, regardless of their kinks, without them even knowing your name, is a non starter. A friend I met early here was having some health problems and wasn't thrilled with the site, either. But that's because her message box was Superfund toxic. She gave me her login and said "have fun.". I knew it'd be bad, but I had no idea how deluded many guys are in this kind that can jump into the box of someone identifying as sub and just start threatening brutal *** *** or *** without knowing their name or anything .

Guys, the bar is set low. If you are a decent person with something to offer, just be honest and act like you care about something other than getting laid or finding someone to hit, then actually feel that way. You'll find being a person goes a long way. Ive had some failures , too, but I'm pretty sure none would characterize me as being rude or diminishing of others...some things just aren't right. There are a lot of bots, but if you arent expecting beyond your capability, you can find plenty of people . Just talk for a while. Just because the site is if a sexual nature doesn't mean the kickoff has to be explicit in nature

[Se****]

4 hours ago, PresentisPeculiar said:

I'm also curious why a straight vanilla profile is ever on here, but most of those are bots .

As to the criticism of the women on this app has been great for me. I've met some great people . Telling a new person you are going to brutalize them, regardless of their kinks, without them even knowing your name, is a non starter. A friend I met early here was having some health problems and wasn't thrilled with the site, either. But that's because her message box was Superfund toxic. She gave me her login and said "have fun.". I knew it'd be bad, but I had no idea how deluded many guys are in this kind that can jump into the box of someone identifying as sub and just start threatening brutal *** *** or *** without knowing their name or anything .

Guys, the bar is set low. If you are a decent person with something to offer, just be honest and act like you care about something other than getting laid or finding someone to hit, then actually feel that way. You'll find being a person goes a long way. Ive had some failures , too, but I'm pretty sure none would characterize me as being rude or diminishing of others...some things just aren't right. There are a lot of bots, but if you arent expecting beyond your capability, you can find plenty of people . Just talk for a while. Just because the site is if a sexual nature doesn't mean the kickoff has to be explicit in nature

Well said. Excellent point of view! I too prefer to simple ask questions and offer the same opportunity to whomever I’m chatting with! Courtesy and Respect are major elements in establishing contact with any profile made here!!!

[ar****]

I joined because I was (am) figuring out my sexuality. Not knowing about some subjects, can be a blind spot in figuring out what you could potentially like.

It's also fascinating to me, to see the topics that pop up in this app/community. I learn a lot about people's preferences that way, which is basically why I still check this app.

Plus, maybe my "vanilla" profile may yet appeal to someone on this app. I met someone through this app, and I'm grateful for the things she showed me! 🙏😁

[Ra****]

19 hours ago, Lunbokz said:

Thanks for the response. I put everything i knew i was into and some things im curious about in my profile and shit like had me wondering if I wasnt "hardcore" enough lmao. I thought what I was into was a little much but I guess not

I think that’s all you can do and welcome to the land of bdsm land, enjoy the subcultures, acknowledge you can gain and fun to have, good luck out there, be kind, I think it’s very karma based lifestyle.

[Ra****]

Just now, Rard1114 said:

I think that’s all you can do and welcome to the land of bdsm land, enjoy the subcultures, acknowledge you can gain and fun to have, good luck out there, be kind, I think it’s very karma based lifestyle.

Oops : enjoy the knowledge you can gain*

[ey****]

the reasons could vary and you'd have to ask the person - but...

a) when this app very first launched it was top of the download charts of all categories.  At the time this caused a lot of people to sign up via curiousity.  I don't know how it fares in the download charts, but similar might be happening

b) Some people have the pre-conception that kinky=easy.   

c) they are maybe kink curious to some degree but are also new/learning/exploring at their own pace and so might be on with a view to learn, but don't want strangers trying to "teach" them

d) they actually might not be kink curious, or think that kink=easy, but if it's high in the download charts for dating might feel they have more chance

e) Or they might be misguided into thinking people are politer on kink sites

f) bots

g) the above isn't exhaustive

I guess though if someone says they're only interested in vanilla and you want kink it's a prompt you're not a match. 

[Laycette]

22 hours ago, Longjohn-5206 said:

I had one on here chatting didn't even realise this was a kink site I soon put her right she thanked me and deleted her account

Yeah it has a lot to do about how it is advertised and to whom, how it's pitched. As far as owners go its sole purpose is to make ***, they don't care from whom. Members = ***. So they sell it as whatever they think people buy. The super woke creche-like rules and censoring is a product of that too. It panders to immature attitudes and politics instead of providing a proper adult space where kinksters actually enjoy being without a censor constantly looking over shoulders. Everything about here is based around vanilla style dating.

[Laycette]

You are the kind of person we are going crook about here. Some are here to learn and that's fine, we are glad to help. But you just think you'll get laid, don't understand kink, don't want to and have a low opinion of us, who we are and what we do. We seek to build community. You are here to prey. You do not belong and don't want to.

[pc****]

20 hours ago, Laycette said:

You are the kind of person we are going crook about here. Some are here to learn and that's fine, we are glad to help. But you just think you'll get laid, don't understand kink, don't want to and have a low opinion of us, who we are and what we do. We seek to build community. You are here to prey. You do not belong and don't want to.

Who tf are you to tell anyone they don’t belong?? I need to see credentials or you’re just being a Karen. :/

[ey****]

A thing with the kink community is that, on one hand it is welcoming to people who want to join and are showing the effort and desire to learn and to partake in community.  But on another, yeah, it has to often self-police and call out stuff which disrupts community.

There has been for a long time people whose attitudes to kink is that it (or particularly the women within it) are easy, that people owe them time and attention - and actually not really have that much interest other than getting their dick wet - and no, it's not bad gatekeeping to say maybe the kink scene isn't for you/them

Likewise, like whenever I see folk on here who are complaining, it's trash, it's fake, it's whatever... ok... so just go.  Stop logging in. If it's so bad why the fuck you even here?! Mind your business when grown folk are talking. 

[Ki****]

You must be curious. Everyone finds different things they like. Anything can be considered kinky to you if it's not something you normally do

[pc****]

12 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

A thing with the kink community is that, on one hand it is welcoming to people who want to join and are showing the effort and desire to learn and to partake in community.  But on another, yeah, it has to often self-police and call out stuff which disrupts community.

There has been for a long time people whose attitudes to kink is that it (or particularly the women within it) are easy, that people owe them time and attention - and actually not really have that much interest other than getting their dick wet - and no, it's not bad gatekeeping to say maybe the kink scene isn't for you/them

Likewise, like whenever I see folk on here who are complaining, it's trash, it's fake, it's whatever... ok... so just go.  Stop logging in. If it's so bad why the fuck you even here?! Mind your business when grown folk are talking. 

😂😂 don’t be mad at me cause you’re falling for the OF girls.. I’m saying it’s not great cause there’s no interaction or people my age 💀. All you old ahh people just rude and wanna sit in your caves keeping your secrets.. Imma Find Out! No thanks to anyone from this community except for one lady who was really cool, I’m just not a sub 🥲😂

[Zis]

10 minutes ago, pcnoob said:

😂😂 don’t be mad at me cause you’re falling for the OF girls.. I’m saying it’s not great cause there’s no interaction or people my age 💀. All you old ahh people just rude and wanna sit in your caves keeping your secrets.. Imma Find Out! No thanks to anyone from this community except for one lady who was really cool, I’m just not a sub 🥲😂

Jesus...we are down to age-shaming now? 🤣 i feel attacked...

[ey****]

1 hour ago, pcnoob said:

don’t be mad at me cause you’re falling for the OF girls..

I'm not.  Like, I've been married 10 years and regularly meet people for play (with my wife's full knowledge and consent) - meeting people is not an issue.

1 hour ago, pcnoob said:

. I’m saying it’s not great cause there’s no interaction or people my age

skill issue.

1 hour ago, pcnoob said:

All you old ahh people just rude and wanna sit in your caves keeping your secrets.. Imma Find Out!

all of the information is freely available. no one is hiding anything. If you don't already know it, then that's on you.

 

[pc****]

5 hours ago, Zis said:

Jesus...we are down to age-shaming now? 🤣 i feel attacked...

Nooo, I’m sorry Love.. Just not what I’m looking for.. I’m sure you’re an excellent person! 🫶

[pc****]

4 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

all of the information is freely available. no one is hiding anything. If you don't already know it, then that's on you.

 

Okay, are you gonna show me?? Teach me in person?? No? Then stfu, you are part of what I’m talking about. Just unhelpful and disrespectful 😂.

[pc****]

4 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

all of the information is freely available. no one is hiding anything. If you don't already know it, then that's on you.

 

Lowkey might be right about the skill issue tho.. I’m still trynna figure out how the posting works.. but Again, just unhelpful and uninviting asf. If you wanna stay in your cave, do that. Don’t be coming at me for sharing my opinion 💀, if I’m wrong let me be wrong. Why you care?

[Zis]

6 minutes ago, pcnoob said:

Nooo, I’m sorry Love.. Just not what I’m looking for.. I’m sure you’re an excellent person! 🫶

Im confused...you said, all the old people are just rude and wanna sit in their caves and kepping their secrets. Sooo, do you want to play with us, or not? If we are not what you are looking for, whats the problem?

[ey****]

12 minutes ago, pcnoob said:

 

Okay, are you gonna show me?? Teach me in person?? No? Then stfu, you are part of what I’m talking about. Just unhelpful and disrespectful 😂.

you want to talk unhelpful and disrespectful? Here's the problem

You barge in "Hi, I'm new - I have done absolutely no learning of my own and now everyone needs to look at me, make it all about me, give me attention, and teach me all the things I am too fucking lazy to do any real research on myself" 

This is why you're getting no responses. This is why no one is engaging with you privately. You are lazy, entitled and obnoxious. That you are not getting what you want is 100% down to you.

No one owes you time. No one owes you attention. No one owes you teaching.  You're supposed to be an adult. Act like one.