STORY - A subs journey into my heart - Part 1

[Notjustcontrol]

Today was going to be a special day for me and my sub, Alex. Today she was going to receive the day collar I had purchased that would signal my ownership of her; something she had admitted to desiring from the start of our journey. It was an artisan, silver collar, locked by a small heart that only I would have the key for. It was discreet but quite beautiful and I was quite nervous as she had no idea that I had planned this. This wasn’t something she would be ordered to wear; it was something I hoped she wanted to accept being locked in place around her neck. I am not a Dom who subscribes to the ‘Master say, sub obey’ at all times, to me D/s is a partnership and this was a huge step and she would have a choice whether or not to accept this, hence why I was nervous.

It was roughly 18 months since Alex, a pretty but scared and inexperienced sub first walked through my door. She was 40 at the time, unhappy and stuck in a marriage to an insecure, mentally controlling guy who had deliberately shattered her confidence. Like so many subs she had repressed her natural desire to submit all of her life through embarrassment of her desires and her *** of getting hurt; physically and emotionally, so had settled for less than she desired.

She tentatively approached me on the site, she was polite, wrote well and explained her situation and we chatted for a couple of weeks. Although her sub desires had remained inside her entire life, she was very open and honest about them when given the chance to express herself with me. Most subs I initially talk to have a defence in place, a protective shield of sorts. Either they are ashamed of their sub side and struggle to admit their true feelings (mainly because they see it as a weakness of sorts) or they have been hurt before by a Dom and carry around with them that previous ***. The intense emotional response that a sub feels when they let go and submit can be so extreme, if it is not cared for by their Dom and is ***d, it can be devastating. Any sub who has experienced this knows what I am talking about. The scars left from such an experience can only be healed from a subsequent positive experience, but putting themselves back ‘out there’ to find such an experience can be incredibly difficult for her…kind of like going in the water the first time after watching Jaws…only something old men like myself can relate to!

Fortunately, Alex had no such scars because she had never experienced her sub desires and getting to know her and what she craved felt natural and moved on quickly, so much so that she managed to visit me within 2 weeks, despite her marital situation. 

The desire for me had always been to find that vanilla / Ds balance and form a lasting connection. I have never been one for having multiple subs, the search had always been to find that intimate ‘special’ bond that I truly believe can only be found with D/s. I had been close before, had some relatively long-term relationships, but never that “want for nothing else” feeling I craved to find with another soul.

THE MEET

I had obviously gotten to know Alex’ desires before we met and she wanted to experience a lot, but, had expressed her lifetime desire to feel a collar locked around her neck by a strict but caring Dom, which on her arrival I planned to make into a big deal.

Although we had spoken on FaceTime beforehand, when entering my house and meeting me for the first time, I could see she was awash with a combination of nerves and excitement with what was to come, also, a great deal of *** and self-doubt. Except for a very few fortunate souls, we all have flaws, insecurities, things we would like to change, I know I do, so for a sub to know these are all going to be on show can be terrifying. Regardless of any imperfection’s subs have, it’s the Doms job to compliment them on their attributes with the aim of building up their confidence and making her feel more relaxed and accepted - unless of course she is a sub who wants to be made to feel worthless, but that isn’t my thing!

I had placed a leather collar and leash on the arm rest of the sofa before she arrived. I wanted to tease her a bit and there is no way she could have avoided seeing it when entering the living room. Anticipation of what is going to happen can be just as arousing for a sub as the actual event itself, taking your time, building up her desire, constantly hinting at things to come, these are all tricks of the mind to get a sub to where you want her to be and you have to get inside her head, if you want her to have the best experience. I knew that putting the collar and leash where I did would send a wave of excitement over her, seeing it, knowing I was at some point going to place that around her neck, lock it on and she would soon be experiencing a desire she had buried deep inside, her entire life. Although she obviously saw the collar there waiting for her, she didn’t say a word about it…neither of us did; sometimes, you do not need words to get a sub wet!

Usually, I get a sub to learn a few positions before we meet, positions she should get into simply by a single word command from her Master. I do this for a couple of reasons.

Firstly, for me D/s is about balance, it’s about both sides doing what they can to please the other, to turn the other on and make it as pleasurable as possible for both, I have no desire for a ‘doormat’ sub. I always put in effort to make it a wonderful experience for her, I find out what she truly wants and I try my best to fulfil those desires, but I require the sub to find out exactly how to please me too and to ‘demonstrate’ her desire to do that. Actions speak, to me, far more than words. Your partner can say to you “I love you” but then do nothing to demonstrate that, leaving you feeling ‘unloved’ despite the words. I need to ‘feel’ a subs desire to learn to please me by her actions, to be honest, its fucking easy with me, I’m a sucker for a sub in nice lingerie so I can easily be pleased, but she needs to demonstrate that on her own and if she can’t put the effort in to learn my tastes and a few positions, it’s pretty clear the balance of effort is off.

Secondly, there should be a *** for the sub of performing the positions perfectly. If her desire to demonstrate her obedience is true, she will want to ‘show me’ she has learned them well…having to focus on that while nervous, excited and turned on will create some pressure and hopefully, *** her to try and overcome her emotions and focus during these times.

However, because I knew that being collared was such a long-term desire for Alex, I only got her to learn one and, bizarrely I named that command COLLAR.

When I knew Alex was coming to visit, I explained to her ‘exactly’ what would happen on her arrival, this is something I would normally never do, the ‘not knowing’ what will happen only increases a subs feeling of loss of control and anticipation, but I wanted to do it differently this time.

I wanted to plant that thought in her mind a long time before actually experiencing it; so she couldn’t remove that thought from her mind. I told her we would have coffee and a chat on arrival after her journey, but at some point, I would say BLACK, putting her into total obedience and then I would say COLLAR. On this command she would kneel on the floor facing away from the sofa, legs wide apart and with both hands, pull her long, dark hair up and away from her head; exposing and offering her neck to her Master and the collar.

Because I told her exactly what was going to happen and how her inner most desire was going to become reality, but didn’t tell her anything else, I knew that thought would be in her mind, day and night, leading up to today. Then, seeing the collar and leash on arrival would only serve to increase her anticipation. I knew her insides were in turmoil; I was pretty sure she was already soaking wet!

Although I did my best to relax her on arrival and make her feel comfortable, there simply was no way to ease her nerves and excitement. So, after 20 minutes, I took the cup from her, placed it on the coffee table and turned back to her. Looking directly into her eyes I said;

“BLACK”

This altered her expression immediately; the realisation that what she had fantasised her entire life, was actually, reality. I stood up, collected the cups from the table and headed towards the kitchen, but as I did so, I said;

“COLLAR”

I could hear her immediately get off the sofa and knew she was complying with my order. I spent several minutes unnecessarily washing the cups and pretending to clean up, just to build the anticipation even further before returning to the living room. The sight that greeted me was quite special. She was waiting perfectly in position on her knees. Her long, dark hair was pulled up exposing her neck, her legs wide apart causing her skirt to ride up and reveal her stocking tops; she looked exquisite and already I was hard for her. I walked behind her, picked up the collar and made sure she could hear the steel leash and O ring jangle as I sat back on the sofa, just behind her. I could hear her breath, fast and deep with a mix of anticipation and lust. I put the collar back down as I couldn’t resist the opportunity to tease and play with her in this position. I moved in close and reached my arms around, allowing me to not only caress and tease her but also whisper in her ear.

“You look amazing, my slave” I said “Your new Master is so turned on and pleased with his slave, you’re such a good girl”

I knew from chatting to her before the two words “Good girl” would send a wave over pleasure over her and sure enough, they resulted in large intake of breath before replying;

“Thank you, Master”

Now, I was going to remind her that in BLACK she is to be totally silent unless I asked a question, which I did not, but I didn’t want her to feel any disappointment in this moment. I wanted this collaring to be special and memorable for her so I didn’t say a word, I simply continued to tease her with my hands, gently cupping her tits and with my fingers playing with her hard nipples that pushed out through the deliciously silky material of her blouse. Her breathing increased with the teasing and when I started to kiss her exposed neck she struggled to remain in position and almost buckled. I gently helped her back into position and stopped the teasing. I had planned to slip my hands up under her skirt to discover just how wet she was, but I think that might have sent her over the edge at this point and besides, she was going to have to endure a lot more tease and denial over the next few hours.

I picked up the collar, reached round and placed it around her neck. It was a medium sized, black leather, fur lined collar and soon it was locked in place. On feeling the collar locked in place and the realisation of her dream, her breathing became so deep and rapid it actually sounded like she might cum, from that single act.

“How does that feel, my slave?” I asked

There was a pause, as if she had forgotten how to speak before quietly replying between breaths;

“It feels wonderful Master, thank you, thank you so much”

I smiled at her reply, she really was evoking strong feelings in me even at this early stage. I stood up and was ***d to adjust myself as I was so hard. My plan to make that single event special for her was complete…now the fun can really begin. I had my gorgeous, collared and obedient slave at my feet and I wanted to get her to the point of desperation and pleading me to be allowed to cum and oh, did I tease her *** body over the course of our play.

THE MOMENT!

I had a good feeling about Alex from our initial communication, but she found a way into my heart during this first meet and what happened at the end of this session, I can still recall as clear as day today, even though it was 18 months ago.

I ended the session with Alex ***ly secured to my bed. She was frog tied (ankles to thighs) and her knees secured to the side of the bed, ensuring they were wide apart and *** but to offer herself to her new Master. Her wrists were roped together and with her arms above her head, secured to the headboard, leaving her exposed and available to my every desire.

She had shown a real desire to learn my tastes, knowing how I love to see my subs in nice lingerie; demonstrating her desire to turn me on. She was dressed wonderfully in a rather special silk basque, thong with stockings and heals; just looking at her ***, sexily attired body in its bondage was enough to keep me hard. But there was something more this time, a genuine physical attraction to her and her demeanour that I had not felt in a while.

We were about 90 minutes into the session and she had experienced a lot of teasing and *** under my control and had been denied any orgasms up to this point, poor girl

Although I am Dom and for sure have a sadistic streak in me, I have a genuine caring nature (thanks to the angel of the mum I had) and actually struggle sometimes to deny my sub the pleasure of an O. A massive part of why I love being Dom is to feel the pleasure my sub gets and to be the reason for that pleasure; that alone turns me on and here she was, experiencing the most arousing sexual experience she had ever known and had yet to receive the climax she had well and truly earned; but that was about to change.

Right now, she was blindfolded and her mouth filled with a ball gag locked in place, which, actually, wasn’t doing a very good of containing her groans of pleasure and ***. Her tits were pulled out from the silky basque she had bought just for this occasion and clamps bit down on her nipples. She had been ***ed by me in this position for about 30 minutes.

As this is not a stress bondage position, she could quite comfortably focus on nothing but the various sensations I was applying and her inability to stop me. The clamps were not fierce but I knew that pulling them off would cause a wave of *** as the *** rushed back into them and I teased her by pulling on the connecting chain. She was straining in her bondage, testing it to re-en*** the fact she was in fact *** and fully out of control, she moaned as I teased her clit through the soaking wet thong, she squirmed as I stopped just before she was about to cum and I watched as her body fought the ropes in desperation and a frustrated moan escaped the gag.

For a first time submitting, I kind of felt she had reached her limit of *** and my empathy kicked in and wanted her to cum, hopefully the most amazing O she had ever had.

I took off her blindfold and removed her gag before laying down beside her *** body secured to the bed. Her head tilted to the side inches away from mine and our eyes met in silence. A look of longing, a look of true desire but most importantly, freedom, pierced my soul when our eyes met. I could see in her face that she had let go of all the concerns of the world she normally had to endure, there was nothing else on her mind, no thoughts of previous *** or worries about the future, there was nothing, nothing but acceptance that she was out of control and truly embracing the bliss only a sub experiencing those innermost desires can feel.

I genuinely felt something special at that face-to-face moment, a mix between extreme lust and nurturing for my *** sexy sub and as my hand moved down between her thighs once again, I couldn’t help myself and leant in, kissing her softly but adoringly as my hand slipped under her thong and started to tease her swollen clit. She tried to push herself against my fingers but the ropes did their job, keeping her exposed and ***. I pulled away from the kiss and I had never seen such pleading in a set of eyes before. She knew she couldn’t speak as we were in BLACK, requiring total obedience and having such a desire to be the best sub she could be, she remained silent, but never have I seen ‘begging to cum’ eyes so desperate.

“You can cum, my slave” I said “But, thank your Master after”

The relief on her face was incredible, her shoulders dropped, she initially bit on her lower lip and instantly her eyes closed as she was finally allowed to give in and end the fight. It took no time at all; her breathing went from fast and deep to a large breath in which she then held as the wave of pleasure consumed her. Her mouth opened wide and you’d think it was letting out a humongous scream but no noise escaped at all, it was as if she was paralysed from the pleasure and her body went rigid for what seemed like minutes, trapped in the euphoria of the orgasm, frozen from the pleasure ripping through every vein in her body; it was wonderful to witness such pleasure in a sub!

Eventually the orgasm eased, she slowly relaxed and came to, it was this next moment and the feelings it elicited it me that I recall so vividly.

She turned her head back to me, her big brown eyes buried deep in mine as she caught her breath before saying;

“Thank you Master, thank you so much”

Those spoken words were totally sincere, open, free and delivered in such an adoring way that it made me ‘melt’ for her at that moment. The look of sheer joy and in a strange way, innocence, filled my heart in a way I had never known.  A tear rolled down her cheek, a tear that represented the release of years of hurt, struggle and *** that proceeded this moment, a tear that can only come after a lifetime of hiding, a tear of finding that light at last in a world of darkness, that freedom that comes from truly letting go.

I didn’t say anything, I didn’t want to, this was something special and it did not need words. I wiped away her tear and simply kept that moment and how it made me feel, there for as long as possible.

Seeing that freedom, that recognition that she had just experienced what she truly craved her entire life, was quite amazing to witness. I had seen it many times before, but this felt different. I gave her another gentle kiss which was reciprocated, before I slowly began to untie her. The clamps caused a sharp breath in as they were removed, her legs and arms automatically stretched after being released. I helped her back up and sat her visibly exhausted body on the side of the bed. I knelt between her knees so we were face to face and said “RED” - signalling she was free to be herself.

She instantly fell into my arms, holding me as close as two humans together can and we simply remained there, in silence, for about 20 minutes, it was quite simply, beautiful ….

 

 

 

[Catsailor69]

Most excellently written.

[Se****]

Beautiful

[Notjustcontrol]

2 hours ago, Catsailor69 said:

Most excellently written.

Thank you my friend

[Notjustcontrol]

1 hour ago, Freetobare said:

Beautiful

Thank you honey

[Deleted Member]

Absolutely exquisitely written. Such a beautiful piece to share. I love reading your scenarios

[Notjustcontrol]

Thanks Sarah 🙂

[Ki****]

WOW, I mean just wow!!! That read was soooo enjoyable.  Thanks

[Notjustcontrol]

7 hours ago, BBFB said:

WOW, I mean just wow!!! That read was soooo enjoyable.  Thanks

No problem, glad you enjoyed it

[Deleted Member]

That was wonderful. Beautiful to read an adoration piece by a DType. I really loved it!!

[Notjustcontrol]

5 hours ago, Peonycharm said:

That was wonderful. Beautiful to read an adoration piece by a DType. I really loved it!!

Thank you for your kind words, I’m pleased you enjoyed it so

[Th****]

In tears. I guess this is just a real wish for me, I thought was actually going to happen. Just recently realizing I was so wrong. Grateful I wasn’t too lost to give those pieces of myself to the wrong one. But so badly thought and was sure for about 2 years. Only in the last year bringing up and exploring some of my and his interests. I knew I cldnt give myself to him in certain ways unless it was def right. And I guess that moment of being sure it was def right, just never came. And then moments of def wrong became more and more apparent. Beautiful. And just awesome. Really wish this had been my story ;) but I’m happy for you both to have it for yourselves. Just awesome when things go the way they’ve needed to for so long.
Maybe one day, if I get unreasonably lucky, I’ll find me that right one.

[Notjustcontrol]

Sadly this is a fictional story, I’ve never found that ‘dream’ connection and currently have no sub so do not beat yourself up. It’s a hard thing to find, just keep learning about yourself, what you want, pick yourself up when it doesn’t go the way you hoped and you feel deflated and….keep going, that’s all we can do.

[Ki****]

Very good read and I was really impressed with the way you tell the story!!! Thanks for sharing this

[Notjustcontrol]

No problem, thank you for the kind words!