This is definitely not the description you were thinking you were gonna read, but if you get through to the end, I promise it’s worth it. Reach out if you want to talk. I just wanted to share a testimony with you all that happened last night. A little backstory first which is also its own testimony. A few months ago, I would’ve told you that BDSM was everything to me. That being a masochistic submissive was who I was. No matter how much I indulge in this lifestyle, it was never enough. I was always looking for more. It wasn’t until I reached my rock bottom of depression and anxiety that I gave up. I cried out to the Lord and asked him to take over my life because my way wasn’t working. I told him that, even if his path leads to my death, that I want that path more than my own. And I meant it! I still do! No matter what we try to do to feel better in this world, nothing is ever gonna feel as good as him being in our lives! So I gave mine to him. The very first thing he did, was take my lust. It’s like a light switch went out! All I did was think about it. I would only get rest for a day or two after I got it. So for him to take that from me was unbelievably life-changing all in itself. I deleted all my dating apps. I deleted my fet life account. I tried to delete this app, but it wouldn’t work. I blocked all the men I had ever talked to and deleted every photo I’ve ever taken to myself that was sexy or pornographic. Best choice I ever made! But my story does not stop there. A little more than three weeks ago God delivered me from marijuana! I have been trying to quit pretty much since I started. I knew it wasn’t good for me and I could hear God telling me to get rid of it forever! I had a Doctor who encouraged it when I found out I had fibromyalgia, I had a therapist who encouraged it telling me it was medicine, I had multiple friends telling me that it was medicine and to keep doing it, and I had a boyfriend that told me I shouldn’t quit, that it helps me and my anxiety. But I knew deep down that it wasn’t good for me. So a few weeks ago, I am walking towards my closet where I started putting it, so it wasn’t in arms reach anymore. Because I was desperately trying to quit. As I was walking to the closet, God quite clearly in my head said “keep on walking and throw it in the garbage”. I thought about it for a moment and then put it right back in the closet. I had just smoked so I was feeling a little silly, and I laughed and said “Lord, I need you to be a lot louder than that because this is so hard!” I wasn’t trying to be defiant or flippant, but I was just recognizing how difficult that was actually gonna be. By the time I made it back to my bed I knew that He meant business! I ***ntly started crying. I cried out that I was not ready yet. I said I use it for everything Lord, I use it for anxiety, depression, to go to sleep. He very clearly in my head said “you’re gonna come to me now”. So I start crying more and then the bartering started lol I said “Lord in the Bible, you said that we could eat of the trees that you made for us.” He then said “ I also said not to be a drunkard” which is so true because anything in excess or that makes you not yourself is technically being a drunkard. I was so blown away. So then I was saying well I hate to waste, because I had so many unopened packages of Gummies and edibles and jars of the plant that I had grown. So I asked if I could give it to my friend who still partakes. He very clearly said “ if I don’t want you to have it, I don’t want any of my other *** to have it”. So I was just crying and crying because this is so hard. I’ve literally smoked every single day except for my pregnancies for the last 15 years at least! I’m laying in my bed arms wide open asking for help in this matter. I ended up looking over at my dresser where I had wrote a post it Note the week before from the Bible app that I had downloaded. On the Post-it note it said “ God can empower you to do what sometimes feels impossible. Choose joy, stay patient, and keep asking him to move on your behalf. So I ***ntly started asking Him to move on my behalf! I was too weak. So He told me to get the things that didn’t matter first, the things that I didn’t care about. So I started collecting all the little tools and old pipes and everything that I don’t use anymore and made a pile on my bed. Before I knew it all of that stuff was in the garbage and I was heading to the closet to get the rest. I threw away brand new packages that weren’t opened, I threw away jars and jars of it, I was just dumping everything into that garbage. The more I put in the trash, the better I felt. Once I had taken that garbage out and put it in my dumpster I felt like a whole new person! I never regretted that decision not once since that happened! I have felt nothing but relief and happiness and praise for God who comes to stand you back up when you’ve been so low for so long. So about two weeks ago, I started getting terrible nightmares. The kind where you feel like they’re real and when you wake up, you are very stressed out. I’ve had a lot of *** dreams, I’ve even ***ed in my dreams. So yesterday morning at 3 AM I woke up to another *** dream. I ***ntly started crying and begging God for relief. I’m just over it at this point! I wasn’t able to go back to sleep and I had to work that day. By the time I got home, I was just beyond exhausted. I prayed to Him again in the evening. I said to Him that I’ve been tempted to go back to weed by the enemy, at least three times because of the nightmares. I have had nightmares my entire life until I started smoking weed. So this is not new to me. They are just back now that the weed is gone. I felt hopeless. I felt like since I have always had them, that they are just something I’m gonna have to live with. I felt so defeated. So in my prayer, I was saying to the Lord that even if I had to keep the dreams, I was never gonna listen to the enemy when he tells me to go back to weed. I knew that God had taken the weed for a reason and I wasn’t gonna give up. I then asked him for the courage to talk about it to my pastor or the Bible study teacher, because I need an answers and help. I was a little afraid to talk to anyone about it because I didn’t want them to think negatively about me. They don’t know me very well yet. I’ve only just started going back to church the Sunday after I quit. I didn’t wanna tell them that I was ***ing people in my dreams for *** of being judged lol So I finished my prayer and was getting ready for bed. I can’t listen to music when I go to sleep because I won’t sleep. But God put it on my heart to listen to it very softly. I thought that maybe if it was very quiet that my mind would hear that as I slept and keep the dreams away. So I went to my Spotify app and clicked shuffle on my favorite Christian music playlist. The very first song that played was “better yet” by Leanna Crawford! My name is Leanne by the way! Coincidence? I think not! Here are the lyrics: You said it’s so hard sleeping through the night And you’ve been trying to hide your tired eyes I remember what that feels like When your thoughts become a prison cell Telling everyone you’re doing well I remember what that feels like You’ve been asking “why God why? “ do you always gotta take your time?” I know that it’s not better yet I know you’re freaking out I know you think that if you were him, you would’ve rescued you by now I know the last thing you wanna hear is keep waiting patiently I know that it’s not better yet But one day it’s gonna be! I was absolutely so blown away by how clearly his answer was for me last night! I went to sleep feeling so joyful. Every time I woke up throughout the night, there was a song in my head playing. I just rolled back over and went back to sleep each time. I woke up feeling so refreshed. God is reaching out to us, we need to start learning how to hear Him. If I had just heard Him in the past, I could’ve avoided so many years of being lost in the pit. I’ve always believed in Him, I’ve always reached out, but never like this. I gave my entire life to Him a little over three months ago. I asked Him to put me on the path that He has for me, not the one that I have. I gave Him every choice. Every single decision that I make goes through Him first. Every single problem goes to Him. Every single worry, every single, every single, every single thing! I cannot stress it enough! The smaller we get the bigger He gets! So I encourage everyone to get out of your own way and to start giving Him control! It only gets better when you do it! The biggest part is having faith and being obedient when He tells you to do something. Even if it seems crazy, even if it shakes up your entire world! Three months ago I was living with a boyfriend in Rhode Island, now I’m back at my ***’s father’s house in Massachusetts. I left everything behind and did what He wanted me to do! I trusted Him with having no job. He provided me with the most amazing Nanny Job I’ve ever had! I’m not promising things are gonna be sunshine and rainbows, but His path is gonna be a heck of a lot better than any path we try to carve out for ourselves! I don’t know what He has in store for me, but it doesn’t matter. I’m here for it! I trust Him! The other day I was in the shower, and He brought forth this idea to write my testimony on my profile since it didn’t work when I tried to delete it. Maybe that’s why it wouldn’t delete. Who knows. Maybe someone else needs to hear my story. So this is me being obedient and sharing my extremely personal story with whoever comes across my page. Thank you for reading, I hope this helps someone. feel free to reach out if you wanna talk about it. God bless! 💜 update/side note, I’m still interested in finding my person. I’m looking for someone who knows how to lead in a healthy way. I want a DD/LG dynamic if possible. I’m not interested in being a slave but I do want structure, rules and boundaries I can push because I am a brat 😂 I love to laugh and joke. I’ll def tease you for reactions. I love playtime. love rough play/cnc

I am someone who is looking to have a little kinky fun and learn more about the kink community. I’m also really submissive but at the same time bratty, so have fun.

Im here to learn more about myself and what I like and dont like. I learned recently that im a Dom in bed but sort of sub out the bedroom. I'm also looking for FWB.

This is definitely not the description you were thinking you were gonna read, but if you get through to the end, I promise it’s worth it. Reach out if you want to talk. I just wanted to share a testimony with you all that happened last night. A little backstory first which is also its own testimony. A few months ago, I would’ve told you that BDSM was everything to me. That being a masochistic submissive was who I was. No matter how much I indulge in this lifestyle, it was never enough. I was always looking for more. It wasn’t until I reached my rock bottom of depression and anxiety that I gave up. I cried out to the Lord and asked him to take over my life because my way wasn’t working. I told him that, even if his path leads to my death, that I want that path more than my own. And I meant it! I still do! No matter what we try to do to feel better in this world, nothing is ever gonna feel as good as him being in our lives! So I gave mine to him. The very first thing he did, was take my lust. It’s like a light switch went out! All I did was think about it. I would only get rest for a day or two after I got it. So for him to take that from me was unbelievably life-changing all in itself. I deleted all my dating apps. I deleted my fet life account. I tried to delete this app, but it wouldn’t work. I blocked all the men I had ever talked to and deleted every photo I’ve ever taken to myself that was sexy or pornographic. Best choice I ever made! But my story does not stop there. A little more than three weeks ago God delivered me from marijuana! I have been trying to quit pretty much since I started. I knew it wasn’t good for me and I could hear God telling me to get rid of it forever! I had a Doctor who encouraged it when I found out I had fibromyalgia, I had a therapist who encouraged it telling me it was medicine, I had multiple friends telling me that it was medicine and to keep doing it, and I had a boyfriend that told me I shouldn’t quit, that it helps me and my anxiety. But I knew deep down that it wasn’t good for me. So a few weeks ago, I am walking towards my closet where I started putting it, so it wasn’t in arms reach anymore. Because I was desperately trying to quit. As I was walking to the closet, God quite clearly in my head said “keep on walking and throw it in the garbage”. I thought about it for a moment and then put it right back in the closet. I had just smoked so I was feeling a little silly, and I laughed and said “Lord, I need you to be a lot louder than that because this is so hard!” I wasn’t trying to be defiant or flippant, but I was just recognizing how difficult that was actually gonna be. By the time I made it back to my bed I knew that He meant business! I ***ntly started crying. I cried out that I was not ready yet. I said I use it for everything Lord, I use it for anxiety, depression, to go to sleep. He very clearly in my head said “you’re gonna come to me now”. So I start crying more and then the bartering started lol I said “Lord in the Bible, you said that we could eat of the trees that you made for us.” He then said “ I also said not to be a drunkard” which is so true because anything in excess or that makes you not yourself is technically being a drunkard. I was so blown away. So then I was saying well I hate to waste, because I had so many unopened packages of Gummies and edibles and jars of the plant that I had grown. So I asked if I could give it to my friend who still partakes. He very clearly said “ if I don’t want you to have it, I don’t want any of my other *** to have it”. So I was just crying and crying because this is so hard. I’ve literally smoked every single day except for my pregnancies for the last 15 years at least! I’m laying in my bed arms wide open asking for help in this matter. I ended up looking over at my dresser where I had wrote a post it Note the week before from the Bible app that I had downloaded. On the Post-it note it said “ God can empower you to do what sometimes feels impossible. Choose joy, stay patient, and keep asking him to move on your behalf. So I ***ntly started asking Him to move on my behalf! I was too weak. So He told me to get the things that didn’t matter first, the things that I didn’t care about. So I started collecting all the little tools and old pipes and everything that I don’t use anymore and made a pile on my bed. Before I knew it all of that stuff was in the garbage and I was heading to the closet to get the rest. I threw away brand new packages that weren’t opened, I threw away jars and jars of it, I was just dumping everything into that garbage. The more I put in the trash, the better I felt. Once I had taken that garbage out and put it in my dumpster I felt like a whole new person! I never regretted that decision not once since that happened! I have felt nothing but relief and happiness and praise for God who comes to stand you back up when you’ve been so low for so long. So about two weeks ago, I started getting terrible nightmares. The kind where you feel like they’re real and when you wake up, you are very stressed out. I’ve had a lot of *** dreams, I’ve even ***ed in my dreams. So yesterday morning at 3 AM I woke up to another *** dream. I ***ntly started crying and begging God for relief. I’m just over it at this point! I wasn’t able to go back to sleep and I had to work that day. By the time I got home, I was just beyond exhausted. I prayed to Him again in the evening. I said to Him that I’ve been tempted to go back to weed by the enemy, at least three times because of the nightmares. I have had nightmares my entire life until I started smoking weed. So this is not new to me. They are just back now that the weed is gone. I felt hopeless. I felt like since I have always had them, that they are just something I’m gonna have to live with. I felt so defeated. So in my prayer, I was saying to the Lord that even if I had to keep the dreams, I was never gonna listen to the enemy when he tells me to go back to weed. I knew that God had taken the weed for a reason and I wasn’t gonna give up. I then asked him for the courage to talk about it to my pastor or the Bible study teacher, because I need an answers and help. I was a little afraid to talk to anyone about it because I didn’t want them to think negatively about me. They don’t know me very well yet. I’ve only just started going back to church the Sunday after I quit. I didn’t wanna tell them that I was ***ing people in my dreams for *** of being judged lol So I finished my prayer and was getting ready for bed. I can’t listen to music when I go to sleep because I won’t sleep. But God put it on my heart to listen to it very softly. I thought that maybe if it was very quiet that my mind would hear that as I slept and keep the dreams away. So I went to my Spotify app and clicked shuffle on my favorite Christian music playlist. The very first song that played was “better yet” by Leanna Crawford! My name is Leanne by the way! Coincidence? I think not! Here are the lyrics: You said it’s so hard sleeping through the night And you’ve been trying to hide your tired eyes I remember what that feels like When your thoughts become a prison cell Telling everyone you’re doing well I remember what that feels like You’ve been asking “why God why? “ do you always gotta take your time?” I know that it’s not better yet I know you’re freaking out I know you think that if you were him, you would’ve rescued you by now I know the last thing you wanna hear is keep waiting patiently I know that it’s not better yet But one day it’s gonna be! I was absolutely so blown away by how clearly his answer was for me last night! I went to sleep feeling so joyful. Every time I woke up throughout the night, there was a song in my head playing. I just rolled back over and went back to sleep each time. I woke up feeling so refreshed. God is reaching out to us, we need to start learning how to hear Him. If I had just heard Him in the past, I could’ve avoided so many years of being lost in the pit. I’ve always believed in Him, I’ve always reached out, but never like this. I gave my entire life to Him a little over three months ago. I asked Him to put me on the path that He has for me, not the one that I have. I gave Him every choice. Every single decision that I make goes through Him first. Every single problem goes to Him. Every single worry, every single, every single, every single thing! I cannot stress it enough! The smaller we get the bigger He gets! So I encourage everyone to get out of your own way and to start giving Him control! It only gets better when you do it! The biggest part is having faith and being obedient when He tells you to do something. Even if it seems crazy, even if it shakes up your entire world! Three months ago I was living with a boyfriend in Rhode Island, now I’m back at my ***’s father’s house in Massachusetts. I left everything behind and did what He wanted me to do! I trusted Him with having no job. He provided me with the most amazing Nanny Job I’ve ever had! I’m not promising things are gonna be sunshine and rainbows, but His path is gonna be a heck of a lot better than any path we try to carve out for ourselves! I don’t know what He has in store for me, but it doesn’t matter. I’m here for it! I trust Him! The other day I was in the shower, and He brought forth this idea to write my testimony on my profile since it didn’t work when I tried to delete it. Maybe that’s why it wouldn’t delete. Who knows. Maybe someone else needs to hear my story. So this is me being obedient and sharing my extremely personal story with whoever comes across my page. Thank you for reading, I hope this helps someone. feel free to reach out if you wanna talk about it. God bless! 💜 update/side note, I’m still interested in finding my person. I’m looking for someone who knows how to lead in a healthy way. I want a DD/LG dynamic if possible. I’m not interested in being a slave but I do want structure, rules and boundaries I can push because I am a brat 😂 I love to laugh and joke. I’ll def tease you for reactions. I love playtime. love rough play/cnc

I am someone who is looking to have a little kinky fun and learn more about the kink community. I’m also really submissive but at the same time bratty, so have fun.

Im here to learn more about myself and what I like and dont like. I learned recently that im a Dom in bed but sort of sub out the bedroom. I'm also looking for FWB.