Molly's BDSM Tips | The Diverse Dynamics of Age Play

This week, one of our members asks our resident BDSM advice columnist Molly, to explain more about the diverse dynamics that sit under the umbrella term of age play. Find out what she says... 

Dear Molly,
Please could you help me with the meaning of a Daddy Dom / Mommy Dom and little pairing? I believe it is not linked directly to age play and the titles don't mean parent/child. To me, my Daddy is my protector, decision maker, owner and lover. I think it can be seen in many ways and wondered if you might want to indulge and enlighten the different ways this particular relationship is perceived and understood? 
cr3ative

Hi cr3ative
Thanks for your question and thoughts on this topic. It's an often debated area of kink and even argued over because as like so many things, it means different things to different people. However, as with all things kink, the key is knowing what it means, and how it works for you and your partner(s). 
 

What is DD/lg?

DD/lg means Daddy Dom/little girl, but as you've rightly said, there's also MD/lb which stands for Mommy Dom/little boy. Of course, it's entirely possible to have Daddy Dom/little boy and Mommy Dom/little girl, or simply a pairing with the gender-neutral term 'little'.  The combinations of how this dynamic works for people can be very varied, which is why umbrella terms exist for these different relationships. One of those terms often used within this, is age play. 

Daddy or Mommy dominants tend to take on a caring nurturing role, someone who likes to be in charge and look after their partner. A Daddy or Mommy Dom wants the best for their 'little' and will set rules and boundaries that help them achieve things. They are playful, fun and loving but stern and severe when needed - especially if rules are broken - very much like an actual parent but in this case, it is with their lover. 

What is age play?

Age play is when someone identifies as a younger age than they really are. Age play is a form of role play, but for some people, it can be an intricate part of their relationship and who they are within it. The age that people like to 'be' varies greatly from very young, right up to older teens. 

Often, people wrongly assume that age play involves diapers, nappies, dummies and being fed by their Daddy or Mommy Dom, but that's not the case. What people like within their age play kink - and what age they like to identify as - covers a vast spectrum. 

The issue with this umbrella term is that not all DD/lg relationships (or any of the possible big/little pairings) involve age play. For many people identifying as Daddy or Mommy Dom or a 'little' - is more about the caring nurturing aspect of that relationship, than one of the partners identifying as younger than they are. 

Some Big/little relationships involve an age play aspect, and some don't,  therefore it is not an umbrella term but an element of some relationships that involve Daddy/Mommy/little dynamics. 

What are caregiver/little relationships?

An umbrella term for caregiver relationships has emerged in recent years is one of caregiver/little - because it's inclusive in that it doesn't refer to just one type of possible gender coupling. It also removes the implications that all such relationships involve an age play element. 

For some people, age play and even the use of the title that refers to a parent relationship is not something that they enjoy, and so this term creates space to include all relationship styles where one person identifies as the caregiver and the other as a 'little' to that person. 

As you so rightly stated in your question, being a Daddy Dom is not about him being your parent or actual Daddy but about his taking on a caring, mentoring, leadership, and sexual partner role within your life. 

Hopefully, that helps to explain about how this kink and the terminology associated with it works, but if you (or anyone else) has more specific questions about this subject or any other kink-related questions, get in touch and let me know.

Mollyx  

Looking for BDSM tips or advice?  Contact Molly via her Fetish.com profile or visit her thread in the BDSM Forum. 
 

 
Cover Image: model released from Shutterstock.com