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Are you living a secret?

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My secrets came out  along time ago to my parents. A leak in the roof , water coming into my bedroom .Came back from school to an empty bedroom.I am not going to tell you the very first thought I had. I went back downstairs...on the coffee table was a corset...and a few magazines..I thought I had hidden really well! Their reaction was not one of Anger..but trying to understand! I was not told off...or punished in any way. I was even allowed to keep everything,even the corset.

My Mum is all the Family I have left, Understands me. Mum's best friend...played a very big part in getting my mum to accept my Feminine side, led to a few angry moments but now my relationship with my Mum could not be better. But, I am still living a secret, which is all to do with my kinks that stays with me and  in my interview!

Have any members been lucky enough , one way or the other...and ended up getting some support from family ? If it wasn't for that eventful day that secret would still be a secret! I now have a really lovely hairstyle...when I can be bothered to style it..Semi permanent..Eyebrow make up..etc...All due to my secret being exposed. Having a secret exposed is one thing...but to get the support from anyone in a family...is another.

I suppose what one would admit depends on ones Kinks. Sometimes , when I am trying to get to sleep, honest, I wonder if the souls of my  lost family members are up there watching over me. So. my secrets may not be that secret! What worries me...if I do end up meeting my closest family up there...How am I going to explain everything..!..Cassie

I'm a secret, my family are so not understanding in anyway, ive tried dropping subtle hints but i get shot down with disgust, my friend's are straight as they come so apart from here im all alone in my closet.

I'm out now, it was a hard thing to do but it's a massive weight off my shoulders ;) 


Posted (edited)

My interest in D/s relationships was a huge secret for years and also the shame of what really got me going from a young age ...so getting over the guilt and shame changed me totally..one of the reasons behind highly visible tattoos of what I love .... I'm proud of it and realy don't care what anyone thinks ..

Edited by Deleted Member
On 09/11/2017 at 7:23 AM, Victoriasponge said:

I'm out now, it was a hard thing to do but it's a massive weight off my shoulders ;) 


You should be super proud of Your self ... C


I first knew I had an interest in D/s when I was late ***s and it did have a detrimental effect on my first marriage, partly because my wife accepted but did not understand why I liked to be bound up. This caused a lot of friction over the years also because I was not really clear in my own mind as to what side of the fence I was on. I was basically having a lot of conflicting thoughts, even thinking that you could just give it up altogether. That does not work. 

When my marriage ended, I got involved in the community and also had a couple of relationships for which I am grateful. Then I got married again, this time with a lovely woman who had a lot more acceptance although she was not into it and I was kind of content to stay in the closet.

Now, for other reasons than this, I am finding myself going through a divorce and have decided to embrace it again, also realising that some of the things I have been doing over the years, like wearing snugly fitting corsets, might actually have been a manifestation of my fetish side. I am a lot more comfortable with who I am now but it is not something I see the need to impose on others

Let us see what tomorrow brings -and best of luck to the author of this thread. Love and acceptance is to be found everywhere. Just be happy with who you are. This transmits to other people.


I’m living a secret, I have a massive need to dress in any kind of  leather clothing from time to time, I have been like this since my ***age years and it’s now getting a lot worse because of all the leather coming back into fashion, I just wish I could walk around outside with my leather trousers & thigh high boots on. I have been with my partner 8 years and have tried to tell her but I just bottle it every time, does any one have any advise ? 


I have a long leather coat - not quite “The Matrix” length that I tend to wear to work during the winter. Nobody bats an eyelid at that even if I am usually the only one around. I also have leather trousers that I wapear out with other high street clothing. They are fairly loose so it is not apparent that it is leather but it is enough that I know.

So, I would say to try it out, mix it up. It makes you feel good that is what matters.

of course, I live in a busy town and not in the middle of nowhere



My fetish doesn't stem from wanting to be female, but looking like one. Full makeup and clothing etc. Unfortunately I am a tall person with big feet

I have never worn high heels of stiletto shoes. I would so love to!  But purchasing, then hiding away from my partner (long term with one child)   I have never told anyone. Nor have I ever found anyone else in to this either.

I have a "goth" style, which makes it easy to wear make-up, and I do go out frequently wearing leathers and trench coat. 

 little do people know I would rather be corseted, high heels and fishnets with a face full of perfect makeup





I am living a secret,  which is quite at odds with my character and personality. 

My closest friend is my Brother - and let’s just say he is super vanilla and to top it off his stron suit is not. An open mind and non-judgemental attitude lol. 

Danced round the topic a little with him but it has crashed and burned. Ultimately he would accept but I think this would be a prickly process that I am not ready for yet. I’m still coming to terms with my Kink myself so perhaps a little early to expect others to too?

I also need to bare in mind that many of my friends are colleagues and I work in public services so not sure I want my kink to be can*** talk.


lastly my sub and I have kids , and ensuring the topic doesn’t stumble into their awareness is important to us. 


Massive respect  for any one who has “come out “



I have found that it is important to come to terms with and accept who I am with all the nuances that this entails in far more respects than kink alone. 

I do not feel the need to impose that on others, nor would I want others to do that to me. If it comes up in conversation, I will acknowledge it.

”We don’t have to allow ourselves to be defined by the labels imposed on us. We get to define ourselves” - Lizzie Velasquez


Hi...I have come to terms with understanding who I am....who and how I want to lead my life....but no one else will....I feel that I am being judged by my love of who I want to be...To be accepted means so much to me...and yet...I feel I am a threat to anyone who will not even bother to get to know me..!..cassie

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