For the love of kink

[FlamingFireF0x]

DOMME profession and a huge kinkster in my personal life.

How to separate the two, and have a healthy personal sex life.

[ve****]

I’ve always said if your in a committed relationship then you can balance the 2 sides of kink and vanilla as there is respect between the two people.

If it’s NSA… the objective is just kink so that’s more of a challenge

Communication effectively is the way forward 👌🏻 x

[Holmsey]

I imagine setting your professional Domme persona and your personal self separately, ideally different spaces, clothes and rituals, and having a format which ends/closes each session and switches off your professional self. Not so much an act, but a role that you enter into.

Whether you disclose what you do professionally to partners is a choice, if you do, explaining the differences and that you restrict real emotions and equality - this is a tough one.

Professional is about serving clients and what they need/require, personal is about serving yourself, with complete emotional involvement, with additional, genuine intimacy.

Have a routine/closure to sessions, a cool down, that switches off the professional you, and leaves her in your professional space/wardrobe.

As difficult as it is, set yourself boundaries with clients, don't get emotionally involved - easier said than done, I appreciate.

[da****]

I have no issues with a professional Domme but it can be hard to turn off that switch once you are out of the professional setting and trying to handle a personal dynamic and it will be something that you will have to work on and through because you may find yourself not wanting to be a Domme at home with a partner because work has you burnt out the “Domme” that I do have issues with are the ones that just demand *** and will never actually meet a submissive where all they are about if getting *** from someone and they potentially are not even in the lifestyle at all

[Ot****]

It could be something as specific as having a “uniform” for when you are working professionally versus what you wear when it’s part of your lifestyle. Having clients refer to you by a given title (“mistress”) and your personal relationships as another (“ma’am”) and any number of things that put you or keep you in a given headspace. You may even establish boundaries on certain kinds of play that you’ll only do in your personal life and not professionally— something you keep just for you.

[ey****]

arguably

the same as any other job

sometimes you'll have had a long/hard day/week at work and not be in the mood.  That's the same in any job, and a partner has to understand that.  

[subjoe101]

Why separate the two ? If you enjoy it then embrace it as a lifestyle.

[Wi****]

Let your subs take control kinda like let’s see what you got. Then you can show them what you got