Being a dominant man means…..

[Do****]

I like to consider myself dominant, but every now and then I find myself wondering what being a dominant man really means. Sure, it’s something you express through your personality—the way you take charge and anticipate needs—but what does that actually mean at its core? Is it just about power and control, or is there something deeper behind it

[Ka****]

I find myself asking the same questions sometimes

[co****]

Lols same jkjkjk

[Gr****]

It’s about taking control and knowing your submissive well enough and her trusting you enough to turn her brain off and let you take the wheel

[theSir_ObservingU]

For me it’s me owning my stuff. I am very unlikely to be shaken by much. Being good at holding space for myself and understanding who I am and what I am willing to be or do. No one can usually rock me. (Maybe my kids). This makes it that I can hold space for a submissive. She gets to know she can trust I am not going to shift or drop or lie or change.

[ra****]

It’s not about power and control.

It’s about trust and respect, both of which are things you not only have to earn, but make a conscious effort to remember how easily they can be lost…and even harder to get back once that happens.

In almost every situation where I’ve encountered a dominant man, even ones who have had experience in a straightforward d/s dynamic, I feel like it ends up being more of a switch dynamic.

I don’t consider myself a difficult woman, but I do ask questions for clarity so I can make informed decisions and provide honest feedback if I’m not enjoying something or already know my body well enough to say something else will probably work better for me. Honesty seems to be often mistaken as being a brat to be punished but quite frankly if the shared goal here is for both of us to be satisfied and happy, then let’s not waste time on things that are counterproductive to that 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

[Je****]

From a newbies perspective, I think being a dominate male is definitely about anticipating your subs needs, showing care and concern, be empathetic but unbending, ***ful yet nurturing and being that one constant yiur sub looks towards for reassurance, trust and protection. That is what I am lookong for anyway. 🤷‍♀️

[CopperKnob]

It's not simply about power and control or how sometime takes charge/anticipates needs. It's an energy that ebbs and flows. It cannot be learnt or f0rced. It's either there or not but not necessarily present at all times within all relationships. Just like submission, it lays dormant until it's around a particulary energy.
These people who suggest that they're dominant/submissive all the time i find hard to beleive.

[Se****]

There is something deeper at its core. It’s called doing what you think is right no matter what anyone else says. Being relentless, never backing down and having that mindset at your inner core. It’s not about just sex, don’t miss that point, it’s about all aspects of life including work and making a name for yourself.

[Do****]

I think at some point we all wonder. I think its deeper. I feel like its WHO you are at your core. I think its an internal yearning to provide, protect, and teach. Its a need to lead, to nurture your sub to be the best version of themselves but to help mold them ao they cam see the potential you see in them. To help them see themselves through your eyes in a way. I think if you are truly a Dom its built in you. Just my 2 cents

[To****]

I think it's in the way you control yourself. It's in the confidence behind your commands, which only comes from knowing who you are. I love that men are asking these questions.

[Av****]

It's a good question to answer for yourself. Alot of guys think "im not submissive so I must be dominant" but that's not true. I think dominant implies you take what you want at a baser level. Your reality supersedes others' who will submit to your reality in exchange for safety, pleasure, status, comfort etc. Broad strokes but you get the gist

[tw****]

To me true masculine domanice in most situations is leadership. Unless the situation calls for a power over dynamic.

[BD****]

If you must ask... maybe you're not. Truly anyway. 🤷

[Deleted Member]

Lets talk soccer. If im a dominant on the field i learn and know how everyone plays and what each person lacks in and good in i make the field for everyone to win at and showcase their talents even tho everyone doesn’t make a goal but the main goal is to win as a team i dont even have to make a goal. Im not controllng others im informing everyone on the conditions and in a broad case make everyone have a control of each part of the field for themselves not me as a whole… you use your intelligence for the matter and not try to control thing for only your benefit…..
NOW being a Alfa is a person (striker) who only has a ego for himself and control with nobody else in mind they dont care about what you need or to make a goal they see you with the ball they want you to give it up to them right away because they are the (best player) in their mind if the team loses its not their fault its yours on how you didnt make him the main player and how you messed up a play he himself didnt set up for you. They want control and focus on themselves they feel the power in how they won the game for the team instead of the team together winning.
So dominant involves intelligence that can bring power but lack of ego/control in relationship
Alfa involves power & control with lack of intelligence (planning or involvement of others) for the relationship

Hope this helps you enjoy✌🏾

[lo****]

True dominance is about having guidance and vision aka leadership mentality. which is the opposite of being led (aka submissive) because you're the leader. Then, there are smaller aspects that branch off from that.

[ca****]

I find that 50/50 relationships rarely ever go the distance. However adjustable ones last. Sometimes your 80% and your partner is 20% and visa versa. However in our corner of the “kink” world we Doms should always be that 90% while are subs only have to do 10%. Why? How’s that fair? Because if we are taking care of the 90, the food, the ***, the decisions, the stress, the problems, the protections, and everything else that takes weight off our subs lives. They are free, free to serve, to be happy, to only ever stress about us and nothing else they can focus on what truly matters to them. Art, music, books, people. They feel safe. Being a Dom a true Dom not just sexual is to Love. Love and give every bit of yourself to your sub.

[Si****]

There's absolutely more depth to it.

It's about being your BEST, expecting others around you to elevate to their best, surrounding yourself with those that help bring out your best.

It's about not having to announce to the world that you're in control, because those around you just naturally follow your leadership. It's about seeing the potential in not only your ***rs, but yourself & allowing yourself & others to grow.

That's what a Dominant Man Is.

[Co****]

It means different things to different people. There are multiple ways to ‘Dom’ or submit.

[lo****]

True dominance is about having guidance and vision aka leadership mentality. which is the opposite of being led (aka submissive) because you're the leader. Then, there are smaller aspects that branch off from that.

[po****]

Dominance is leadership at its core. Leadership brings “power and control”- someone devoted and desperate for power and control will never actually have it. The insecurity and anxiety makes you a sub lost in delusion. Some people aren’t ment to lead. Dedication, self empowerment, ambition, understanding strengths and weaknesses. This makes a leader someone who won’t *** what’s offered.

Could you/ would you, be willing to leave “control and power” behind? That’s raw dominance. I never question mine, it often time’s scares me and exercise letting go of it.

In a room full of men in the quiet king. Nothing to prove, nothing to change. In a wolf pack you rarely see the alpha challenging others. While the rest bicker and fight. “Power” the intelligence alone separates the king, not just physical strength.

Are you actually the alpha or just pretending to fit the role?

[Ch****]

A dominant man inspires others to follow, if it's to be over simplified. "Power" would have to be defined (see the 5 bases on the net), "control" is a dicey word here. Dominant play is potentially somewhat different, but in our opinion needs the word "protects", along with creative, etc.

[ST****]

In reality im fairly new to expressing my sexuality openly, but the way I see it is that life has so much going on and people have so many responsibilities that it feels good in general to turn that off and to be free to let loose and live in the moment regardless of what youre doing. Being "dominant" allows you to take on the responsibility during sexual acts to allow your partner to feel free to not worry about a thing, to free their mind and let loose, and just enjoy the journey, and trust that youre going to make it an enjoyable/pleasurable experience for both of you. Being able to PROVIDE that pleasure in a positive way, while also enjoying what youre doing, is key, as in the end even though you are the "dominant" one, its about them and making sure they're taken good care of.

[Ha****]

One thing that I feel is misconstrued playing both sides of the fence.... Domination is not about the power. It's about having the control. It's meeting your subs needs more than your own. Their pleasure is my pleasure. Their want is my need. Yes they have given you the authority... What will you do with it? How will you conduct yourself. I've seen and experienced psychotic abusive assholes who ran under the flag of being a dom.

[Ha****]

Under the flag of being doms