Ghosting VS Blocking

[Su****]

My personal opinion blocking someone happens its usually ( by my standards) you were impolite and rude and did something strictly against what I have informed you I prefer , or your being stalkery and I have already declined said advances , however as per ghosting ( in my opinion) is when someone doesn't block you but has made intrest in meeting up or something of that nature literally tells you where to be and at what time then no longer responds at all to you and I have personally shown up and been met with no reservations or sat waiting for hrs with no response or reply , thats personally how I see ghosting not just someone not wanting to continue talking to me and just going incognito .but as for all of these it would be far less detrimental to the person said actions are being done to , to get some type of sorry no thanks or I got nervous and bailed just something so we aren't stuck feeling played or totally unwanted by someone we shared personal feelings/ information with

[ra****]

Sometimes I do it because I am simply a coward

[ho****]

Because people are closed minded idiots. I’ve been through the same thing. I’ve even been blocked for no reason. Like one day it’s going great next day go to message them and poof blocked and gone.

[Deleted Member]

Something weird happened a few min ago. I'm new to this site and I received a visit on my profile. I went to check who it was and I had already been blocked. Some people just straight up have issues and blocking someone gives them some control over their lives ig.

[Ne****]

13 hours ago, Champ-- said:

I think this topic is interesting because it highlights how varied interpretation is. I like the example of how it would be if it were an inperson interaction.

I think that if 2 people are talking in person & both people are talking back & forth in what appears to be a pleasant conversation, & then one person runs away like there's an active shooter in the building, it would feel really weird. I think the original post was describing something more like that; when a conversation was going back & forth natural & seemingly positive, then out of nowhere blocked. If that were an in person conversation, then it would be weird, but it's somewhat of a more acceptable practice online.

I think other posters have talked about different interactions, like when someone is cyber stalking or trolling or using some other type of inappropriate behavior that would feel very dangerous if it were an inperson conversation. Like someone in a bar that keeps following you around asking for a dance or to buy you a drink, & despite your declining repeatedly, they won't stop & you are afraid of anything you do next. How they may escalate. You want to leave, but will they follow you to your car? Is there any security in here & will they protect you if you become more blunt with this person & they escalate to something physical? Online, the danger is less because it's online but can be just as annoying, scary & even harder to escape. Some people will go so far as to create new profiles when they are blocked & just keep harassing you. No one should have to deal with unwanted attention or any kind of ***, whether emotional or physical, if it isn't an established part of their consenting interest.
I think as a Segway i see that alot. Some people who say "oh this is a kink community, I can do whatever I want here". But consent is important. Just saying you like _____ doesn't mean it's appropriate to just treat a person the way that you enjoy. It's one of the grips I have with FET. Filling out a profile often makes people think they know everything there is to know about you, & that's wrong. Just because a person says they are submissive doesn't mean you can just message them with demands like you have had an established relationship with this person where you both consent& agree to play. It doesn't mean you know or understand in what ways they are dominant or submissive.

I think online assumptions & interpretations are more prevalent because you lack the ability to see a person's face ; hear their voice sense, tone, modulation, pausing so on. You can't see their expressions & mannerisms to better see their intent. Some things can be more off than they are. This presents additional challenges in communicating. For the people who disregard any manner or respect for another person & behave like there are no consequences because they are hiding behind their keyboard, they do need to be blocked at first sight. But I also think that alot of other people find themselves blocked simply because alot of people have gotten used to how easy it is to block vs talking to people & interacting with them, getting to know them. I think blocking instantly is important because alot of behavior is attention seeking. Even if it is negative attention, it's still attention. Like the kid that kicks their parent. The parent reprimands them, but the kid continues until the parent chases them to issue a punishment. For this kid, it's playing tag or hide & go seek. For the parent this is serious. But the kid engages in this behavior each time they want attention despite the consequences. It's because what they really want is the attention, even if it's negative. So some people send unsolicited d*** pics or vulgar messages right out the gate because to them its their game they are playing. You not consenting to their fantasy, is irrelevant to them because as soon as you engage, even to scold them or by embarrassing them, they still get what they wanted, it's the attention they wanted all along. Notice me, talk to me because otherwise I'm invisible. If enough people ignore them with the immediate block, they will stop because they are being denied the attention. This blocking must he consistent & unilateral or the behavior increases. It's the psychological equivalent to gambling. The person that keeps putting *** into a slot machine, pressing the bet button in a frenzy, because sometimes it pays out. It becomes a chase to find the next pay out, because the person learns it will eventually pay; you just have to keep pressing the button until it does. Similarly, this type of person indiscriminately sends messages seeking the payout of the one person who gives the desired attention. Anything you say or do in response will only encourage their behavior. Blocking or ghosting is the only way to respond to their behavior. But not everyone fits this model. Some people aren't seeking unhealthy attention & can communicate effectively. Blocking or ghosting them has an opposite effect in isolation & inner feelings of inadequacy. unwarranted rejection often leads this person to be *** to *** because the person that does give them attention may be the type that is perceptive to this person's self conscious feelings & takes advantage. In this way the social nrom of Blocking & ghosting creates a toxic culture that does little to those who need to be blocked, as their behavior gets plenty of negative attention, & many others who are blocked become victims elsewhere.

I think it's those of us that have the intellectual intelligence & emotional intelligence to talk & engage about our interests first, then play when we have an understanding & agree on whatever we share as interests. It's us that kinda get frustrated when people assume something is a red flag or this person is boring because they go to slow. So they instantly block because it's convenient & easier than communicating. I think blocking & ghosting has often become the tool of the lazy & that alot of people get blocked or ghosted because it's easier to organize alot of messages in your inbox by just deleting & blocking the ones that are perceived as boring or eh I have so many messages that I need to simplify these by blocking the old ones & focusing on the newest messages. There isn't always a behavior reason for the block, if someone gets alot of messages ghosting or Blocking is just convenient & easy.

The impact seems minor but it's not. Most people notice how inperson interactions have become less polite. Customer service representatives rarely greet you, it's often Just 'what brings you in today' or 'do you have your receipt' or 'what's your account number'. People have become conditioned to a robotic form of interaction & 'sorting' interactions by value have become common.

I work in the behavior health field & I face complications in interpersonal relationships the most. It's probably the ethos of so many relationship dysfunctions. Inappropriate communication. Some say it's not their responsibility to educate others on how to be or speak or how to treat others. This is true but also untrue.the true aspect is that no one is responsible for parenting other people other than their biological or adopted ***. However, social standards are primarily taught by example or modeling the behavior. For example if you've never been to church before but find yourself in one for whatver reason. Your not religious but would like to be respectful. It's not really anyone's responsibility to teach you how to be religious. If you wanted to be then it's your responsibility to seek the knowledge. But when you see everyone standing at a particular time you may stand out of respect because everyone taught you by modeling the appropriate behavior. When the culture accepts a behavior & performs it, then it becomes taught by being modeled to others. Excessive blocking & ghosting become a standard that is just performed as a 'normal' behavior & is taught to new observers as a culturally acceptable norm. Whatever the reason, good bad or just a person's prerogative. I think its when done indiscriminately, it makes the culture toxic

Nice expounding.

Some people have zero manners, regard, awareness of/for others regardless if online or in-person....

[Deleted Member]

Overall I'm under the impression most people don't see others as individuals, but instead project their own bad experiences on others without actually acknowledging them as "new people". The bliss and the curse of pattern seeking ***s 🎻

[Deleted Member]

A lot said,
But while I see ghosting as understandable due to factors such as loss of interest in “ghostee”, busy with other life activities, more interest in someone else, too many options and chats to respond to and even personal psychological issues;
Blocking on the other hand is what I find more concerning. And this is not because or in the situation where someone does or says something deemed offensive or inappropriate, but more in the sense that the blocker rather than provide closure or express dissatisfaction simply bails on the blockee without any explanation. This is what I find emotionally abusive.
For example, if you asked me for a full picture in a chat and I sent you a picture of myself that is not nude, not erotic, but just a picture of myself and let’s assume you find me unattractive in your own standards and instead of communicating to me that you find me unattractive, you simply block me, I think that is both insulting, embarrassing and emotionally abusive.
As a result, I will find it difficult to send my pictures to anyone else that asks and not because I am ashamed of my appearance, but because I am scared of being treated like another monster.
In summary, ghosting or blocking someone for offensive reasons after issuing warnings or not is not the problem. The actual problem is ghosting or blocking someone without a reason.
However, at the end of the day, everyone is entitled to their social media behaviours. I just move on regardless. Hopefully I find someone or maybe not. IT IS WHAT IT IS. ✌️

[ey****]

1 hour ago, traumatologist said:

Something weird happened a few min ago. I'm new to this site and I received a visit on my profile. I went to check who it was and I had already been blocked. Some people just straight up have issues and blocking someone gives them some control over their lives ig.

I can give a suggestion why it happened.

The person may have visited other people in the past, weren't interested enough to message them - but then got a "you looked at my profile" message from the other person, possibly either assuming she was interested, or, on the defensive "why you looking at me?!" and so, as a protection measure, pre-emptively block after viewing so they don't get these messages. In these cases it's (probably) not a you thing, but because of issues in the past. It's still not no reason

Add in, I am aware of guys who block women so they don't revisit people they weren't interested in.  

[57****]

3 hours ago, 8inchBarrel said:

A lot said,
But while I see ghosting as understandable due to factors such as loss of interest in “ghostee”, busy with other life activities, more interest in someone else, too many options and chats to respond to and even personal psychological issues;
Blocking on the other hand is what I find more concerning. And this is not because or in the situation where someone does or says something deemed offensive or inappropriate, but more in the sense that the blocker rather than provide closure or express dissatisfaction simply bails on the blockee without any explanation. This is what I find emotionally abusive.
For example, if you asked me for a full picture in a chat and I sent you a picture of myself that is not nude, not erotic, but just a picture of myself and let’s assume you find me unattractive in your own standards and instead of communicating to me that you find me unattractive, you simply block me, I think that is both insulting, embarrassing and emotionally abusive.
As a result, I will find it difficult to send my pictures to anyone else that asks and not because I am ashamed of my appearance, but because I am scared of being treated like another monster.
In summary, ghosting or blocking someone for offensive reasons after issuing warnings or not is not the problem. The actual problem is ghosting or blocking someone without a reason.
However, at the end of the day, everyone is entitled to their social media behaviours. I just move on regardless. Hopefully I find someone or maybe not. IT IS WHAT IT IS. ✌️

I totally agree with you..many block because they dont want to express their feelings. Dont want to saying not interested anymore. Its a simple sentence but hard to express..I have been ghosted a lot. We have a good conversation going then"gone" I question "why" I thought it was going good..I have learned not to get emotional anymore. Just move onto the next person. They are out there

[ja****]

Again I guess for me people say if no answer is an answer and all this other stuff yeah sure but just because it's an answer doesn't mean it doesn't reflect on what kind of person someone is. You don't have to do anything you don't owe me anything but basic civility demonstrates that if you just ignore people then you do have Bad Manners it's that simple

[le****]

Sunday at 06:05 AM, rabbit381619 said:

Sometimes I do it because I am simply a coward

At least you're honest about it 😅

[Deleted Member]

LOL.... been ghosted more times than I can count, even after the last message said they were interested. 🤔 🤣

[Deleted Member]

Kind of makes a person wonder if its even worth it anymore honestly.

[Ma****]

A lot of blocking comes from not fully accepting who they are and what they want! I think alot of people use this app when they are already kinda in the mood ya know? So when the mood ends they think about the things they said and the places they chatted and shame builds up. Once the shame gets to bring more discomfort then the conversation brings comfort they block the person. It’s unfortunate but it’s based out of not knowing their limits, and not respecting people’s time and emotions :(

[Mo****]

Rejection hurts, whatever shape it takes.
But even though, we're not responsible for their fragile egos

[la****]

I block if someones stressing me,useally i just ghost though

[Le****]

Blocking makes more sense to me than ghosting. Either way, the person isnt getting the closure on knowing what they did to lead to it or if it was even something they did at all. Unless its a safety concern either of the two feel a little immature to me personally.

[ac****]

Both suck.. period. If you are having a conversation with someone and it doesn’t go the way you want it to, a simple explanation letting them know you don’t want to talk anymore is sufficient. You can let them know that you are going to block them as well, this way you don’t have to talk to them again and they know it’s coming.

[Ne****]

*Not every interaction deserves the courtesy of announcing dismissal. Things can so quickly become toxic, threatening, definite waste of time & energy to try and explain anything let alone why I will now block you that it simply isn't worth it to do so. If it just isn't going how one would like, then courtesy is lovely and considerate, and yet STILL NOT MANDATORY. Just interact respectfully and most people won't abandon on purpose.

[ac****]

Yes, sometimes it’s warranted with no explanation. I thought the conversation stemmed around having a mutual conversation. Maybe I’m wrong. If so, I agree fully.

[Deleted Member]

January 3, woburn169344 said:

I appreciate your post. I hope I don’t come across as insulting towards you. I have thoughts in relation to consent in the way you mention it. Consent pertains to conversations between adults that involve planning activity where one or more parties will have physical things done to them. I’ve read postings and threads here that do a good job in explaining how consent pertains to BDSM activities, and the intricacies particular to some of the complexities of these activities on Fet.

The messaging through media about consent has been strongly associated with men violating women and the significant harm caused to women when consent is disregarded. People hear “consent” and associate it to a man raping a woman. That was the context of public discourse in “raising awareness”.

When it is raised as a point of importance in other interactions between men and women, regardless of motives and intent, I see it as an unfair portrayal of a man/men. The word association does this. There is a concept referred to as “concept creep”, defined as “the gradual expansion of harm related concepts to include a broader range of experience, often moving from severe of milder cases, or including new types of harm”. Within the context of interactions between men and women I see this happening towards one sex and not the other. It raises questions about fairness, objectivity, and bias in those who participate.

Your previous post relating to the experiences of some women in real life circumstances, and motives to use ghosting and blocking were insightful. It was communicated without resentment or hostility displayed towards men. I liked the insight and agreed with the message. I didn’t take issue with it at all. I supplement positive feedback.

What I take issue with in this post is the notion of teaching consent, I take it as good faith from you. My concern with it is that I think “teaching” about consent in the context of man woman dynamics is misguided. People who are reasonable, fair minded, and care about the needs and feelings of others don’t need to be taught about consent. Those who are not that way are not going to become that way from teaching the importance of consent or guidelines to follow.
Women, just as well as men, falter when it comes to what is reasonable, fair minded, and caring about the needs and feelings of the opposite sex. Some people show consideration, others show a lack of consideration. Teaching people to be reasonable , fair minded, and considerate is not an easy thing to do. Especially if they think they already are, or have reasons they think they ought not be that way.

I appreciate you, and your comments and understanding. Thank you.

A lot of my interactions with you across posts come off as offensive.

In person, I imagine conversations are amazing and full of intense passion and effort and real genuine intelligence and integrity and interest in fullness for mutual understanding and support of ideas. I love the words and passion of your language.

(The rest of this is just a general comment, not towards you personally)

Online strips so much emotion and that relates to this post 1000%.

In person, a lot of these encounters would be able to send a whole picture and the absence of a grin or smirk or silly pose makes a phrase land from playful to predatory.

And also provides no real context or explanation after block/ghost (but also people lie) so it's an imperfect system.

The blocked and ghosted need to keep adapting to get the results they want. Free education, take notes.

And that means maybe people getting these results, stop being cutely creepy or just creepy, friend requests before connecting, liking all pictures, immediately sexual and demanding, (it's not working and comes off as desperate and low value, NOT INTEREST) and take accountability for your portion of the result and change behavior.

[Deleted Member]

18 hours ago, acoolguy123 said:

Both suck.. period. If you are having a conversation with someone and it doesn’t go the way you want it to, a simple explanation letting them know you don’t want to talk anymore is sufficient. You can let them know that you are going to block them as well, this way you don’t have to talk to them again and they know it’s coming.

Put this in perspective the woman on this site have say 10 thousand profiles views and most men have a hundred or less. Meaning if 10% of views result in messages that's a thousand connections vs a man's 1 connection. That is the disconnect, women are putting in extreme effort just logging in, it's a totally different experience and if you don't start with the reality of the situation understanding will never exist.

[Ba****]

5 hours ago, MDQC said:

I appreciate you, and your comments and understanding. Thank you.

A lot of my interactions with you across posts come off as offensive.

In person, I imagine conversations are amazing and full of intense passion and effort and real genuine intelligence and integrity and interest in fullness for mutual understanding and support of ideas. I love the words and passion of your language.

(The rest of this is just a general comment, not towards you personally)

Online strips so much emotion and that relates to this post 1000%.

In person, a lot of these encounters would be able to send a whole picture and the absence of a grin or smirk or silly pose makes a phrase land from playful to predatory.

And also provides no real context or explanation after block/ghost (but also people lie) so it's an imperfect system.

The blocked and ghosted need to keep adapting to get the results they want. Free education, take notes.

And that means maybe people getting these results, stop being cutely creepy or just creepy, friend requests before connecting, liking all pictures, immediately sexual and demanding, (it's not working and comes off as desperate and low value, NOT INTEREST) and take accountability for your portion of the result and change behavior.

Well that’s less of an online thing directly, video chat while sometimes patchy is online but does have the benefit of facial expression and tone of voice
While a romantically old-school written letter while benefiting from a usually more favorable interpretation has still the same problem we have here
Aka the writers intend being at most secondary to readers interpretation
Even this here comment can be read the “soft spoken grandfatherly” kind of way or in a more “nasally condescending tone of voice” which optimally is up to your conscious decision but usually your initial gut reaction, the only real way i have of influencing that would be to outright tell you my intentions, which i’m not gonna for dramatic effect^^

[wo****]

On 1/18/2026 at 4:25 AM, MDQC said:

I appreciate you, and your comments and understanding. Thank you.

A lot of my interactions with you across posts come off as offensive.

In person, I imagine conversations are amazing and full of intense passion and effort and real genuine intelligence and integrity and interest in fullness for mutual understanding and support of ideas. I love the words and passion of your language.

(The rest of this is just a general comment, not towards you personally)

Online strips so much emotion and that relates to this post 1000%.

In person, a lot of these encounters would be able to send a whole picture and the absence of a grin or smirk or silly pose makes a phrase land from playful to predatory.

And also provides no real context or explanation after block/ghost (but also people lie) so it's an imperfect system.

The blocked and ghosted need to keep adapting to get the results they want. Free education, take notes.

And that means maybe people getting these results, stop being cutely creepy or just creepy, friend requests before connecting, liking all pictures, immediately sexual and demanding, (it's not working and comes off as desperate and low value, NOT INTEREST) and take accountability for your portion of the result and change behavior.

Most of my interactions with everyone come off as offensive lol. I don’t hold grudges, I recognize your name but have no thoughts of anything rubbing the wrong way. In fact, I don’t even believe in the concept of blame under any circumstances.

The way I process communication is sort of reverse order from everyone else. It has its benefits and uses, but it’s not very relational for most people. I’m working on better calibration when engaging with others. Most people experience meaning first. I experience structure first.

I treat individual one on one conversations differently, particularly with women if it’s anything with romantic interest or casually social in nature, or showing interest in pursuit of those things.

Your last paragraph stands out for me. It points out problematic behavior without being hostile or argumentative. It offers practical advice and calls for accountability without attacking. That’s maturity, it’s respectful, and it’s something I appreciate.
 

[Dr****]

Friday at 11:51 PM, acoolguy123 said:

Both suck.. period. If you are having a conversation with someone and it doesn’t go the way you want it to, a simple explanation letting them know you don’t want to talk anymore is sufficient. You can let them know that you are going to block them as well, this way you don’t have to talk to them again and they know it’s coming.

Only a man would say such a thing. You're not accounting for all the times conversations have quickly gone South and the woman has left the conversation more scared than when she entered it