You have a vanilla friend that's curious about the lifestyle..

[co****]

How would you introduce someone that's skittish to the BDSM community?

[wa****]

Talk with them first and bring them to an event

[Di****]

Bring to an event

[Sh****]

Have the ‘curious’ friend ask everything they can think of, and help them find the answer.
Show them a glossary of terms and meaning, see what is/isn’t their interests.
Above all, be that open minded friend who never judges another friend.

[Lo****]

Have them take the other test. The one at bdsmtest* Then talk to them thru it all. It’s a good baseline

Edited January 5 by FETMOD-TF
*External link removed

[Th****]

Sit down and see what questions they may have. If you bring them to an event I suggest a munch not a play event. Play events can be overwhelming for most especially first time.

[Un****]

Pornography, I'm fairly certain this is the gateway through which most early exposure to the fetish, bdsm and polyamorous cultures are most commonly and comfortably explored. It's definitely been the vehicle of choice in my experience.

[Mo****]

I actually am navigating this now! Im trying to find a very vanilla munch and a couple education environments to bring her to. She is very subby presenting so I am excited to see how she will blossom with some guidance.

[Sq****]

Curious or skittish? The two don't necessarily overlap by much.

[Sl****]

Just today I brought up that to a vanilla friend! I spoke of my curiosity and how wide open that the kink community can be (I said that rather than a specific part) but you can always drop little hints to see whether your friend responds out of curiosity vs rejection. I’m sure you’ll hear tons of great suggestions so good luck!!

[ge****]

Sit down and have a long conversation with them - understand their specific interests, recommend resources for them to expand their knowledge based on those interests, if they're ready to "dip a toe" suggest they attend a Munch to meet other like minded people in a social situation - but take it all at their s***d

[ey****]

it depends on a lot of things

there's people I can think of who I would just say "come to a munch, meet people" and then others when that is totally the wrong approach.

Some who I'd openly chat with and answer any questions, and others where I aint entertaining their delusions.  

There isn't a one size answer

[Pa****]

Boundaries

[WR****]

From a male hetero-Dom pov, I offer this: Be secure in your manhood. Be patient. Be polite. Show gratitude for her willingness to reliquish control a little bit. Be consensual. "Con"-meaning "together" and sensual, well, be sensual playing or in your case, teaching.
The REAL challenge is maintaining the long-term commitment in a world full of half-starters. That's my two cents. Peace!

[57****]

Start with a social munch..share your experiences. Blindfold when trust is built.make sue they are open minded. This is how I started

[Ch****]

Be patient and remember that as a Dom your position is entirely dependent on the trust you earn from her and the personal power she’s then willing to relinquish to you in the exchange. Care for her before, during, and AFTER the experience. So many “Dom’s” miss the mark on understanding that they must care for their Sub deeply. As stated above establish boundaries, and keep it fun. Allow it to build up at her pace while you remain confident in your yourself. What seems tame to you will be intense for her.

[Ga****]

Probably sit them down for a cup of tea and have a chat about it.
Like, litterally explain about it, the various levels of involvement and wide range of tastes, lifestyles, limits and so on.
Like how some keep it to a small part of their life or the bedroom, or how some dedicate their entire life to it.
Depending on their familiarity with kink, you could also explain the basics or how far it goes or can go.
As well as emphasis on the communitys values, like health, safety, and consent.
Only you know your friend and what they are like, so you'll have to figure what fits best, but this is how id introduce someone curious to the concept of kink and commmunity myself. Just frank and honest friendly chat about it

[Si****]

First off why are we mostly assuming its a she? Talk to them, let them ask questions, then SLOWLY introduce them. There are a ton if resources out there that they can read or watch. Then when they are ready, take them to an educational event for beginners. The key is to introduce this community in a positive, loving, and educational way.

[Ch****]

I speak in the term she because I am a straight male Dom. It doesn’t mean I am not understanding and inclusive of other dynamic setups. But my reality is as a straight male with a female sub so it will continue to be a SHE and you can choose to personalize my message to fit your dynamic. Have a great day.😎

[DS****]

I wouldn’t

[Sw****]

If they're curious about it that means they are at least familiar with that kind of things are involved in the most basic sense so I'd just start with what questions they have. If they're curious, I'd tell them how I started and grew into it. Just chat at their pace then maybe introduce them to a munch group I'm with and take them to the vanilla meets for a while

[ka****]

Well I'd talk to that friend first, and then host a party or find someone that is a mentor in bdsm, for me I love teaching so, I will always ask what the person is interested in and then ask if it's ok to proceed with the actions but not full *** just lightly to show them the action, and if they go I can take more then up it a bit.

[Deleted Member]

Start with beginner friendly topics like light impact play or decorative rope play like shibari

[Ba****]

Well I wouldn’t,
at least until they ask for it
And not just for them
Just answer any questions they might have as honestly as comfortable and refer them to material/media from educational over romance up to soft core “adult entertainment”

[Si****]

Well, I just kinda mentioned it when she said she was getting bored with sex stuff. When I got home I offered to help her explore some options. And that was that