Damaged but not broken

[Da****]

Sometimes I feel like I’m broken. Broken mentally, emotionally, and physically. Sometimes I feel like the ways I’m broken are irreparable. I have a love hate relationship with my past trauma. I hate that it makes me think the things I do. I hate that it makes me feel insecure when all I want is to be seen as confident and strong. I hate that I have nightmares. I hate that I get easily startled or overwhelmed when around other people. I love it though because it has made me strong.. it has taught me valuable lessons, it has made me appreciate my life and the good in it. I’m able to help other people, relate to them, give them the advice they need, or just simply empathize with them in a way most people can’t.

I always feel like because my little girl has been shut away (my vulnerability) for so long and never allowed to come out because she’s so fiercely guarded, that she’s underdeveloped. Being at war with the emotional mind, with your rational one is so incredibly frustrating. I know why my Dominant side guards her. I know why I limit access to her. Someone would literally wreck my world if they betrayed me in this state. How do you tell yourself it’s safe when it never has been? How do I keep my Dominant part from springing into action when my *** side gets its feelings hurt over something stupid? When I fight it’s not with my little girl, it’s with my inner beast. I deploy it like a protection mechanism.

When I feel threatened I immediately shut off all vulnerabilities and you are left with my Dominance which is unyielding, assertive and refuses to bow. Inside though my logical mind is yelling at me to stop. That this isn’t worth a fight. My emotional mind says, the fuck if it isn’t! My vulnerability is sitting in the background grasping the chain around her ankle trying to pull it free from the wall while my beast guards it. She wants out, she wants to do all those amazing things we have talked about. I’m just so fucked up that I get in my own way. It makes me feel crazy because I have so many different layers. It makes me feel broken because even though I know the things I’m thinking aren’t true, I still gear up to fight. It makes me feel unlovable because who wants to put up with me?

I think that’s why I get extra needy after a fight. It’s a reassurance you still care, you still want me. This is very much my little girl standing with arms wide open and extended towards you because she knows where she belongs. She knows who she belongs to. All she wants is to make you happy and doing so makes her happy.

That’s why I said that I know I can submit. That doing so offers me the ability to shut my mind off and bask in your Dominance.

I can’t help but wonder.. does anyone else feel this way?

[an****]

I feel this all the way, I was hurt in this *** state, several times, and it feels like my own mind has locked me away from it so that I cant bring it out anymore, because it no longer feels safe and my mind has to guard out at all costs, it takes a long time to build the kind of trust needed to bring this side of me out anymore to truly let go

[oz****]

This is why I love the D/s dynamic. On the other side, I can switch off and be in the moment with my sub. I am in control, I deliver what my sub needs, everyone is happy.

[Bv****]

Olá, tudo bem? 😘 Meu nome é Akambi , estilo namoradinho, romântica e carinhosa. Quero te satisfazer e te proporcionar momentos inesquecíveis e muito gostosos 🔥❤️🔥

*Valores e regras do meu atendimento:*

*1 hora de atendimento* → R$ 500 (Hora adicional → R$ 300, pago ao término da primeira hora)

*Sinal para agendamento* → R$ 100,00 (obrigatório e antecipado)

*Restante* → R$ 400,00 assim que você chegar 🥰

*O que eu NÃO faço (sem exceção):*

🚫 Sem camisinha = sem programa
🚫 Nada de tapas, agressividade ou práticas violentas

*O que eu sempre ofereço no início caso você deseje :*

🪥 Escova de dente nova + sabonete
Assim começamos bem limpinhos e confortáveis 💕

*Opções para você se deliciar :*

- Me assistir com 1 mulher → R$ 1,000 (Sem participação)
- Me assistir com 2 mulheres → R$ 1.350 (Sem participação)


Tudo sempre com muito carinho, tesão e respeito mútuo 🙂
Se for cavalheiro e educado, prometo uma experiência inesquecível 🔥. Cuidado não se apaixonar hein?! 🙈❤️

Gostou? Me fale que dia e horário teremos esse momento só nosso, inesquecível e mágico ❤️❤️❤️
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