Casual guys vs serious relationship guys

[Officer_DaddyDom]

Interesting this topic came up, I have been thinking a lot lately about how I only see women looking for nothing serious/casual/etc. or majority are Poly. This goes for dating apps and kink websites like FetIfe and Fet app.

I make my intentions known on my profile, I don’t do hookups/casual/open relationship or Poly anything. While I’m not religious, my dating values are more so stemming from my family and European nationality.

When I think of dating someone, I don’t think of dating multiple people, but solely 1 person at a time. I don’t like how dating has gone to people dating multiple people at once, then the other person doesn’t even say anything about it and you don’t know if they’re being sexually safe with other people.

People are fucking greedy, they want instant gratification and won’t commit to 1 thing. If people see something better and they can acquire it, they’ll dump and leave the person their with currently. The way these people don’t have any emotional attachment to someone they’re seeing is fucking scary, they’ll lie about loving you and caring about you.

Dating is a fucking joke.

[jinxed]

15 minutes ago, Officer_DaddyDom said:

When I think of dating someone, I don’t think of dating multiple people, but solely 1 person at a time. I don’t like how dating has gone to people dating multiple people at once, then the other person doesn’t even say anything about it and you don’t know if they’re being sexually safe with other people.
 

Very glad to see this comment on here. It's an interesting time when people are looking for advice on how to be seen as a hook-up-only person. No disrespect to the author of the OP, but it's nice to have someone mentioning sexual safety and I'd extend this to emotional health. Whether monogamy or polygamy, in my personal opinion any connection is more nourishing if it is involving the whole system, including the heart. That doesn't mean that it has to become a marriage-like situation as in forever and ever, but for whatever time is being spend together, there is a deeper and I'd claim a more fulfilling connection.  

Unfortunately, I agree, it seems there's a clear tendency towards quick and physical. However, what the excessive consumption of fast food leads to is no secret. 

[Officer_DaddyDom]

2 hours ago, jinxed said:

Very glad to see this comment on here. It's an interesting time when people are looking for advice on how to be seen as a hook-up-only person. No disrespect to the author of the OP, but it's nice to have someone mentioning sexual safety and I'd extend this to emotional health. Whether monogamy or polygamy, in my personal opinion any connection is more nourishing if it is involving the whole system, including the heart. That doesn't mean that it has to become a marriage-like situation as in forever and ever, but for whatever time is being spend together, there is a deeper and I'd claim a more fulfilling connection.  

Unfortunately, I agree, it seems there's a clear tendency towards quick and physical. However, what the excessive consumption of fast food leads to is no secret. 

I’ve honestly become more of a Demisexual person, I can’t jump in bed with just anyone anymore. I feel I would need a deeper bond and connection, I want to know that the person I’m with is strongly and deeply attached to me emotionally. I want to form an emotional bond, I want person be me “My person” and I theirs.

When you know someone is afraid to show you all their emotions and feelings, whatever they may be. You just appreciate that person so much more. You both know you aren’t afraid to be weak in front of one another if and when the time comes, only to reply on the other person to help you get backup and not take advantage of your low.

[ey****]

I think one thing in general is not everyone is compatible with everyone else - even when it's folk you may have good rapport or "connection" with it doesn't mean it's right for a relationship 

whether this is someone wanting Mono vs someone non-mono

someone who is only/mostly looking for stuff which is short term, casual, pick-up, hook up etc versus someone who is wanting someone who would likely be long term 

to what they're generally looking for in relationship/dynamic

a kinda issue people sometimes make is "compromising" a little too much into something that isn't want they want, in the hope they can be satisfied (they won't) or that the other person will change (possible. but high risk)

The kinda reality is accepting that some folk aren't right for you and not trying to convince yourself otherwise or worry about "missing out"

god, I feel I've overused quote marks here - but hey ho

[cl****]

Idk for me it’s not a type. It’s the connection. However, where I’m at in my life is I don’t want the level of commitment that’s needed to sustain healthy relationship. I know that about myself and I am upfront about it. My rule is if you start developing feelings more than friendship we must end it. I may date multiple people. Doesn’t mean mean I am screwing them all. Idk if this answers your question.

[de****]

Stop seeking forever my guy!
Bad energy.

[Mi****]

4 hours ago, detroit83836 said:

Stop seeking forever my guy!
Bad energy.

Seeking? What in particular?

[de****]

LTRrs should not be on the table period…
That language shouldn’t even be considered nor spoken by Men here or on dating apps regardless.

[Sk****]

52 minutes ago, detroit83836 said:

LTRrs should not be on the table period…
That language shouldn’t even be considered nor spoken by Men here or on dating apps regardless.

That's just like, your opinion, dude. this app isn't ONS central. Lots of kinks and dynamics take time to put in place and polish to perfection. With your attitude, i'm not surprised you cant comprehend that.

[Un****]

Just like there are differing sexual preferences and kinks, so are there levels of relationships. Who are we to judge which is right? Personally, I'm not into hopping from bed to bed; however, nor am I actively seeking a forever and ever. If it happens it happens, and if it doesn't it doesn't. I'm more interested in the connections I make with people, mentally and emotionally.

[parkcruiser]

this online scene everyone looking or chasing hatever , all have so many ruled you must be ??? ect , and you must not be????, and fixated on physical appearance ,and everyone has thier life and want to experiece what they are interested in, so the journey is to find those that align with your ??? unfortunately there r lots of unscrupulous devious people with malintent, and the male mind has not evolved sexually mentallly since the caveman days and havr no shame lol

[MistressWhipplash]

If I ever seek to give random play it will be at two events only: Club Pedestal in Vauxhall London or the carefully vetted The Cruel Huntress Hunt..

Otherwise I solely do kink in a long-term woman focused (me) relationship where I am Boss in daily life.
I can tell the quickie fuckboys a mile away and they get blocked.

Good news is I'm not seeking and are here to share views, that's it as my daily life as a writer works for me.

When I was searching for a woman focused relationship I put friendship first. We spoke about non-kink for about a year and once they were mine it went from there. We knew our kinks matched as both our profiles on Collarespace (now sold to Alt and not very hood.) were very clear relating to kink, S&m, and ***. It's been eight years now with them as my live-in-Property, so yes long-term can so be discussed.

However, most guys seek online play on this site which I'm not interested in at all.

Edited April 19 by MistressWhipplash

[parkcruiser]

i never look either , i like surprises so go with the flow ,even though im bit more sexually minded than the average bear im not out to get laid