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Financial Gain on Fetish.com


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I have a question for anyone who may be interested to respond and since I view this as a technicality, I couldn't post this anywhere other than under technical stuff.

Now my questions is this....

As far as I'm aware, you're supposed to declare if you're on the site for financial gain and get a Currency Sign on your profile. Feel free to correct me as required.

Does the same rule apply to having a wish list (I'm not naming any names here so as not to fall foul of any forum regulations)?

Hey! Won't you buy me a £600 phone but No I'm only here for the kink!

I am asking purely out of curiosity, doesn't affect me either way as my wish list has things like home made cookies and the odd bratty behaviour.

All thoughts welcome.


Yes SirArtu....I concur with you on this....it would appear that quite a few profiles have this wish list...which to my mind is bending the rules somewhat...each to there own and no doubt in time the site may well take a different view on this.

well a wishlist is likely breaking the no external links rule if nothing else... also, potentially, the no contact details rule...

I think all this is destroying the site its prostitution to be perfectly honest .sexual gratification for gain .and i will put this as nicely as i can but these ....prostitutes i believe are not the only ones making from this arrangement .if i digress i apologise i feel strongly about this and it is without doubt destroying the site the question is is it just us the users that are bothered

I think the users that are bothered are the ones allowing themselves to be bothered.

Guy messages woman, she's not interested - no problem

woman messages guy, he's not interested - "all these Fin Doms are ruining the site"


@Domybidding Well, we have to consider that the Site is eventually here to make *** so they're also losing out on this occasion and personally I am neither against people offering services (sexual/kink Or otherwise) in return for monetary gain (We all have to make a living and if you can find a customer to market your product to then all the best to you) nor treating your Top/Bottom to a present because you're grateful for what they add to you as a person. .

However, I'd once been asked to send a $100 to someone over PayPal before she met me "for a coffee"

There are people openly advertising they're just interested in taking someone's *** (which has been discussed here before) and also this Wishlist stuff that, in my opinion, just takes the biscuit!

I think the bigger issue is where does this fit into Lifestyle....the beauty of any open community is the inclusion of all and everything...but financial domination/wishlisting poses another question in so much as many of us have little or no understanding of the gratification a person gains from paying for something that we quite readily assume is free....im not here to demean someone for asking to be paid but the payee also cannot be demeaned for wanting to comply in that sense as his/her gratification is something we may not understand....its a tough one and im sure others will join in with this....good post SirArtu

@eyemblacksheep Just like to clarify that I haven't messaged anyone nor expected a response. I merely came across a new profile on the News Feed and noticed that this Wishlist was mentioned a few times.

I am not bothered in any way, except for the fact that it lowers the quality of my experience on the site and I would simply like to Block profiles I don't like so that I don't have to constantly be reminded of being surrounded by tricksters and con artist in all walks of life. At least on here....


sorry, wasn't more for Domybidding 

but yeah, I agree - I think wishlists probably do fall outside the rules.   

they are getting very clever and of course, the example of the phone is a simple scam to get *** out from a gift. they dont pay the appropriate fees for gain. My guess is that the mod dont have resource to look into details about all these new scammers. But I do hope not many fall into their trap. Domybidding, this site is german so they are very understanding regarding "escorting" girls, prostitution is a different term as its illegal here! but I agree with you, it should only be kinksters not meat market.

@Jed I am not discussing any type of a "relationship" here my friend. An understanding between two people is not something I intend to stick my nose into, not at all.

Simply put, I do not like the "Hello, show me the *** first!" 

And I'm not even saying people shouldn't do it. It is the responsibility of the Site Admins to deal with that.

All I'm asking for is a Block button.

I won't apologise for refusing to include fraudsters in my kink!


@SirArtu couldnt agree more...I think that its definitely an issue for the site to deal with...my musing is more of where are the boundaries within the community....we openly preach inclusion in any aspect of Lifestyle but this side to it poses new questions for us....I firmly of the belief that it should be monitored and if necessary actioned by the site so that the more vunerable within the site dont fall foul of tricksters.....as i said great post.


@FabSeverus Very well said. And if resources are what they need then I'm willing to help out for free. The truth is, also, that they're creating a lot of this work themselves. Every photo has to be checked and approved, every new discussion on the forum has to be approved, so many things have to be checked because you can't load this picture or make this comment. And all the authentication stuff... I mean, O don't want to send a copy of my passport over to God knows where....

If they'd just relaxed a little.... :)


@Jed Thank you for your input buddy. Nice belt by the way. One wonders whether the holes go all the way to the buckle 😉


In response to the post - i expect it is breaking / bending the rules - but i also expect it is tolerated due to the reaons posted above (resource etc)


On a personal level - the moment  someone introduces 'financial gain / or materialistic gifting into the conversation - is the beginning of the end for me.   100% turn off.


@callipygian "100% turn off" is spot on. Kinda makes me think "Oh you already think you deserve a reward do you?" 


Hi all, just responding to @SirArtu ’s post as one of Fetish.com’s Community Managers.  

Having a ‘wish list’ on your profile isn’t against the terms of use, however, if you’re actively looking or state that you're looking for financial gain on fetish.com then this is a different matter. Here's a link to another forum post which tackles the issue of FinDoms for example. 

When someone messages you asking for *** or suspect them for any reason, you have control of the following tools in the message system:

1. Respond with a ‘no thanks’ so the person can’t write to you again.
2. Report the message to our support team
3. Ignore ignore the member (block them). 

You can also:

1. Report a profile if you feel that the profile is acting against the community guidelines or who doesn't have a currency icon when they should, by visiting their profile and selecting ‘report’.
2. In your profile settings, you can set your message filter to who can or cannot contact you (only verified profiles, filter by message length, etc).

Finally, we rely a lot on you - the community - to tell us when people aren’t playing by the rules. I understand it’s annoying, but as a free to use website (with paid options), it’s impossible for us to weed people out at the get-go unless we make the site heavily restrictive. We have a team of moderators and support staff on hand, but the community working together in helping the community, works for a better experience for everyone.

Thanks! :)


@leocadio Thank you for the detailed technical clarification I was looking for. However, the issue remains that I am unable to Block someone unless they send me a message. That leaves me exposed to those demands for paypigs and cash machines whereas a simple option to Block on the profile can ensure that I am unaware of this profiles existence.

As @callipygian said above, it's a turn off and not just from those persons but inevitably reflects on the site.

Just some friendly feedback for what it's worth. I believe the genuine users of this website want it to succeed and become a place many return to (rather than see profiles not logged in for 6 months as mentioned on another post)


.... so we can all kink a little better :)


Love and Peace


you can however set filters as above.

if you select you only want to receive messages from verified users - those who sign up hoping for quick cash are rarely verified.

No messages, jobs a good 'un.

I've got a filter set on message length so nobody of any gender or dynamic or interest can send a message that just goes "hey" 



I don't think finances or material goods are rewards. Some people want things/*** in exchange for the services that others want from them. It's called reciprocation, where both people get what they want. It's reasonable to expect that nobody is going to give anything of themselves away if it doesn't benefit them to. It's why we don't have slaves any more and pay people for their time when in employment because they objected to being used.

I think the people who expect to only serve their own self interests,  both financially and sexually, have unrealistic expectations of what most humans are like. Although they might well find *** people they are able to exploit.

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