Catching feelings

[Charms]

What do you do if you find yourself catching feelings for you kink play partner.

 

I'm lucky master and I are also dating. But I know for a fact there would be no way I could just be his submissive if we were not dating.  It was master who asked me to be his partner. I'd never of asked him.

 

Master as been the only play partner iv ever had feelings for and fell for.

 

Edited April 7, 2023 by Charms
spelling adjustment

[DeviantInside]

Ok so the only person that can ever know what is right for you is you. I would generally always advocate being open and honest with it, as if you don’t it will often times result in something repressed bleeding out in other ways. However there is no black and white rule. If you are happy (truly happy) with the way thing are and that means more than what could be then enjoy things as they are and for all that they are. But the first step is looking at yourself and recognising what you want, what you need, and what you are going to be happy to compromise on.

[St****]

Been there

[Charms]

@deviantinside that's exactly why I was willing to be his sub. He made me happy inside so much. He was extremely supportive with everything I was dealing with. It's a long story how I became his sub. 

 

But even going for coffee as freinds witch we did for weeks  before anything happened kink wise or anything else between us would make me happy. Family an freinds didn't know I was meeting master for coffee.  But they all said it was the 1st time in over a year they had seen me smile or be happy.  It was just 2 freinds catching up after a long time but it was being with someone I could talk to freely an also the same for  master.

Edited April 7, 2023 by Charms

[Charms]

8 minutes ago, Storyteller05 said:

Been there

Hope you are ok dealing with all.the emotions 

[DeviantInside]

4 minutes ago, Charms said:

@deviantinside that's exactly why I was willing to be his sub. He made me happy inside so much. He was extremely supportive with everything I was dealing with. It's a long story how I became his sub. 

 

But even going for coffee as freinds witch we did for weeks  before anything happened kink wise or anything else between us would make me happy. Family an freinds didn't know I was meeting master for coffee.  But they all said it was the 1st time in over a year they had seen me smile or be happy.  It was just 2 freinds catching up after a long time but it was being with someone I could talk to freely an also the same for  master.

So are you comfortable able and able to be honest about how things have developed? There is no fault or wrong, it is just what is.

[DeviantInside]

I don’t k ow him or the situation as well as you do. So do you feel you want/need more than is. Do you feel it would be reciprocated. Are you willing to accept that it may not be. And if not does it still give you what you want. These are all things you probably ought to consider.

[Charms]

Deviantinside  he was going threw so much an so was I.  Then I had to go away for a few weeks so I didn't see him and 1 day we had a very long chat and we were both 100% honest with each other. Master had been feeling exactly the same as I was about him.  

 

Then we got closer an I become his sub. I didn't become his sub because he'd admitted he had feelings for me. Rather the fact he actually had the time to commit to being my master.  We spent weeks talking in person and over messages about what we both wanted, needed an had time for. Until 1 of our talks I did not even know master was a kinkster.

 

We have not long celebrate our 5th anniversary of our relationship 

[Deleted Member]

Same thing.. i met a girl here, we talked and decided to meet. Plan got canceled and i was little clingy and kept texting her all the time cz genuinely i have feelings for her. She thought I’m too clingy and she blocked me nd left. I miss her all the time but can’t talk anymore. Hope she understands and give me another chance. :( miss u

[Charms]

I'd known master 25 years before I became his sub. We did date when we 1st knew each other. But we were just kids at the time. 

[Booboo-8759]

I'm interested in this convo because I'm certain my babygirl is a sub for another and they are much closer, yet she won't admit it. I simply want all involved to feel safe and have their kink and emotional sides met completely. Open honesty is difficult for some tho I've noticed even when they say that's all they've ever wanted.

[Charms]

59 minutes ago, Booboo-8759 said:

I'm interested in this convo because I'm certain my babygirl is a sub for another and they are much closer, yet she won't admit it. I simply want all involved to feel safe and have their kink and emotional sides met completely. Open honesty is difficult for some tho I've noticed even when they say that's all they've ever wanted.

If she's subbing for others  is it something you agreed upon when you started being her play partner. 

 

I agree being open an honest is important.

 

I think people get hurt more in kink relationships than vanila because we have to trust alot more an are more vunrable

[QXX666]

Unless you are a sadist or masochist, most Dom have feeling for their subs. But it doesn’t have to be romantic or love in the vanilla sense. All the subs I had , never been involved in a vanilla life with them. It’s my choice and for most of them also. It didn’t minimised our dynamic and bond.

[Charms]

Iv had play partners were it was purely platonic. Master was the 2st one I had true feelings for.

[Deleted Member]

There's nothing wrong with having feelings for play partners. Personally, I need to feel a connection with my subs so it's almost an essential. Those subs I've not really had feelings for I've rarely seen more than once or twice.
The only issue is if you find yourself in danger of crossing boundaries and becoming possessive when that's not what you've agreed.
I'm now ethically non-monogamous and am very much in love with my two main poly partners, but I also have a lot of love for the three or four "comets" I only occasionally see and play with. Even though we play occasionally we talk a lot, and are really close friends.
The great thing about ENM is there's never a shortage of love to go around, at least in my experience! We all are very clear about what we want from each other and also what our boundaries are.

[Deleted Member]

There’s nothing wrong at all. Sir and I met on here and began a DS relationship…. Now we’re married. Enjoy the connection 😎

[Nocturne-8767]

I've had this, our shared enjoyment of their *** turned into trust, and trust turned into more affection than I had anticipated... We are together now, after miles of troubles along the way, though right now trouble seems to be on the way once more, I do truly hope to make it work.

[Charms]

On 4/7/2023 at 2:54 PM, That-couple237 said:

There’s nothing wrong at all. Sir and I met on here and began a DS relationship…. Now we’re married. Enjoy the connection 😎

Congratulations on the amazing journey you and your sir have gone on.

 

May I say I love your mask