Cuck Men Who Aren’t Submissive

[no****]

I’m into some BDSM, specifically as a femdom. Have gotten some requests from men who are into being a cuck, but they think that THEY get to pick the guy, etc. and they’re very pushy. Doesn’t feel like they’re submissive, at all. Has anyone else dealt with this?

[Deleted Member]

Eww no my way or no way

[Ch****]

Lmao there are many fake male subs 🥲

[ok****]

Im not one of the fake ones!! Im not gay, im not bi..im not even bi-curious...but if i were serving a Domme and she wanted to see me with a man...i would obey without question..would hoping shevwanted me pitching and not catching....but i am there to please het on any way she chooses

[Deleted Member]

As someone who finds cuckolding a hot topic I just don't understand how someone can expect a domme to just cuck them right off the bat?
Surely it comes as part of a strong and loving dynamic.
Of you don't have that, is it not just b
Vouyerism?

[do****]

Glad to see I'm not the only one. I dismiss them quick. Only talk to women about sex and no cuck makes arraignments. Never

[ey****]

cuckolding is a common fantasy and certainly not one limited to submissives

obviously of course there are those who have specific fantasies they would like to happen - and - even those who are submissive still have a right to a fantasy - even if they probably don't realise how gross it sounds telling you who you should or shouldn't fuck.

 

[ge****]

While I don't think a cuck (whether submissive or not, and no they don't have to be) should get to pick the guy 100%, I *do* think their agreement to whoever it is is needed unless otherwise agreed, especially in cases where serving the bull is required.
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The lady may be the one to make the choice, but the cucks input is valid too - whilst I wouldn't be against a cuckolding scenario, I would find it very hard to do if I didn't like the bull for example.
.
As for submissives being pushy, some can be for sure, but then I guess there's also a difference between being pushy and their own preferences and likes being taken into account and distinguishing the two things is the key there.

[ey****]

there is a lot, actually, I think gets strange in a lot of cuckold fantasies and does almost immediately put someone in an awkward place

I think if someone already is in a relationship and turns to their partner - "hey, so I have this fantasy... what do you think?" if they're up for it then they have to discuss and agree what makes it work.  They both might have hard passes somewhere along the line.

I did know one lady who... sometimes she'd go out supposedly to pick someone up but then, not.  And sometimes the concept she was out looking for sex was enough for him (even if she wasn't *actively* looking) and equally if she told him what a great night she'd had, exaggerated if needed, that fit the fantasy.

But of course others would want evidence. Pictures. Cummy knickers. Used condoms. To watch. To clean up.   Whatever.

So understanding what both people would want is important.

 

However there's bits change a little where there's single (or, ahem, sometimes married - this one gets weird) men who approach women about being their cuck.  And on paper this is very "hey, so, I want a relationship with you but I also want you to have sex with other men - and - probably not me - that cool with you?" which just seems batshit on paper.

I guess if the person they approach is in a relationship then ok it's very "you fancy me, but cannot have me - and me and my partner will humiliate you for it... oh, and maybe you can fund dates..." 

but when a single guy approaches a single woman to cuck him, that can surely be surreal.   

I do think a little is a play on the "unobtainable Goddess" trope to a degree - and in some cases for that trope to work, there maybe has to be specific types of man who *could* obtain - and like I say some of this is a little gross but if two people are going to play together then it needs to work for both of them.

[Do****]

Lots of subs seem to want to manage a Domme. It feels like a red flag to me.

However if you were in a relationship with a sub and you both wanted to invite someone in then I could imagine some might want input.

But otherwise beware of blokes who want to submit, provided you Domme them how they tell you to. It’s different to agreeing each others needs and limits and working within them.

[ok****]

As a sub, i have absolutely no legitimate reason to complain about any choice my owner makes. I am privleged and thankful to be used for her entertainment at all. Her needs and desires are my only concern.

[no****]

4 hours ago, DommeDelight said:

Lots of subs seem to want to manage a Domme. It feels like a red flag to me.

However if you were in a relationship with a sub and you both wanted to invite someone in then I could imagine some might want input.

But otherwise beware of blokes who want to submit, provided you Domme them how they tell you to. It’s different to agreeing each others needs and limits and working within them.

Right, exactly

[no****]

9 hours ago, gemini_man said:

While I don't think a cuck (whether submissive or not, and no they don't have to be) should get to pick the guy 100%, I *do* think their agreement to whoever it is is needed unless otherwise agreed, especially in cases where serving the bull is required.
.
The lady may be the one to make the choice, but the cucks input is valid too - whilst I wouldn't be against a cuckolding scenario, I would find it very hard to do if I didn't like the bull for example.
.
As for submissives being pushy, some can be for sure, but then I guess there's also a difference between being pushy and their own preferences and likes being taken into account and distinguishing the two things is the key there.

Claiming to be sub but also being that pushy is 🚩🚩🚩

[ge****]

7 minutes ago, norman146 said:

Claiming to be sub but also being that pushy is 🚩🚩🚩

Not disagreeing in the slightest - just highlighting that there is a very subtle difference between being "pushy" and highlighting preferences and likes and being able to recognise which is which is the key

[no****]

15 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

Not disagreeing in the slightest - just highlighting that there is a very subtle difference between being "pushy" and highlighting preferences and likes and being able to recognise which is which is the key

Oh semantics 🤡🤡🤡🤡

[ge****]

12 minutes ago, norman146 said:

Oh semantics 🤡🤡🤡🤡

Not in the slightest bit semantics - a submissive demanding everything their own way is being pushy - a submissive expressing their preferences, likes, boundaries etc as part of an open discussion with a dominant is absolutely not, though I have seen some who claim to be dominant try and suggest otherwise.
.
I don't "claim" to be submissive, I *am* submissive, but I also have a mind and voice of my own which I'll absolutely use to express my preferences and likes, not demand them, and frankly any dominant that tries to deny me that ability will not be for me - if that makes me any less the submissive their eyes then so be it, no skin off my nose.
.
And while you may think it's "semantics" I highlight it because it's important to acknowledge and show that yes submissives do have a voice and are entitled to express opinion without blindly following whatever a dominant says (unless that's been explicitly agreed of course) and there's a clear distinction between that and being pushy.
.
Being pushy or using someone as a kink dispenser has no place whether from a dominant or a submissive.

[no****]

21 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Not in the slightest bit semantics - a submissive demanding everything their own way is being pushy - a submissive expressing their preferences, likes, boundaries etc as part of an open discussion with a dominant is absolutely not, though I have seen some who claim to be dominant try and suggest otherwise.
.
I don't "claim" to be submissive, I *am* submissive, but I also have a mind and voice of my own which I'll absolutely use to express my preferences and likes, not demand them, and frankly any dominant that tries to deny me that ability will not be for me - if that makes me any less the submissive their eyes then so be it, no skin off my nose.
.
And while you may think it's "semantics" I highlight it because it's important to acknowledge and show that yes submissives do have a voice and are entitled to express opinion without blindly following whatever a dominant says (unless that's been explicitly agreed of course) and there's a clear distinction between that and being pushy.
.
Being pushy or using someone as a kink dispenser has no place whether from a dominant or a submissive.

stop adding your diatribes/rants to my topic.

[ge****]

20 minutes ago, norman146 said:

stop adding your diatribes/rants to my topic.

Can assure you no rants from me - merely different opinions and perspectives in response to your OP and subsequent responses - which after all is what a forum is about, open discussion and debate.
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If you actually took the time to read what I've said, rather than seek to be dismissive, you'll note we're actually in agreement on a number of points, including that it's not OK to be pushy
.
Where we appear to differ is whether a submissive has any choice and whether expressing (as opposed to demanding) that choice is being pushy or not, if you don't like my opinion on that, then fine - nothing says we have to agree, but please don't try and censure me for holding one and expressing it.

[no****]

37 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

Can assure you no rants from me - merely different opinions and perspectives in response to your OP and subsequent responses - which after all is what a forum is about, open discussion and debate.
.
If you actually took the time to read what I've said, rather than seek to be dismissive, you'll note we're actually in agreement on a number of points, including that it's not OK to be pushy
.
Where we appear to differ is whether a submissive has any choice and whether expressing (as opposed to demanding) that choice is being pushy or not, if you don't like my opinion on that, then fine - nothing says we have to agree, but please don't try and censure me for holding one and expressing it.

Then make your own post and leave me alone….?

[Au****]

On the part of the choice a sub into cuck is allowed to choose whether if that particular situation or arrangement suits him.
Being sub doesn’t mean that everything and always must be ok, a sub is still a human being with his own limits and preference.

On the handling part depend on the agreement and the relation that you have with the sub: as a sub I’ve been proposing things that have been sometimes accepted and sometimes rejected, but there was already a situationship with my domme…

I wouldn’t know with subs that you haven’t me yet.. I guess it depends from the vibe that you build up with them

[AKA_Copper]

Yesterday at 05:13 PM, gemini_man said:

Not in the slightest bit semantics - a submissive demanding everything their own way is being pushy - a submissive expressing their preferences, likes, boundaries etc as part of an open discussion with a dominant is absolutely not, though I have seen some who claim to be dominant try and suggest otherwise.
.
I don't "claim" to be submissive, I *am* submissive, but I also have a mind and voice of my own which I'll absolutely use to express my preferences and likes, not demand them, and frankly any dominant that tries to deny me that ability will not be for me - if that makes me any less the submissive their eyes then so be it, no skin off my nose.
.
And while you may think it's "semantics" I highlight it because it's important to acknowledge and show that yes submissives do have a voice and are entitled to express opinion without blindly following whatever a dominant says (unless that's been explicitly agreed of course) and there's a clear distinction between that and being pushy.
.
Being pushy or using someone as a kink dispenser has no place whether from a dominant or a submissive.

Spot on, if a Dtype isn't at least willing to listen, hear and discuss my wants and needs, that's the point I walk away.
And, I'll add, it's strange how, behaviour in a public forum will often transfer in to real live scenarios.
This isn't kink, role or gender specific, it's literally the foundations of any power exchange relationship.

[JourSans]

On 6/12/2023 at 1:51 PM, oklahoma-city805 said:

As a sub, i have absolutely no legitimate reason to complain about any choice my owner makes. I am privleged and thankful to be used for her entertainment at all. Her needs and desires are my only concern.

Really?  That just doesn't seem real to me.   

[ey****]

5 minutes ago, JourSans said:

Really?  That just doesn't seem real to me.   

it's one of the textbook answers

and it's... ugh.   

being grateful for any smidge of attention is fairly unhealthy.  but to be someone's sub to the extent of you put your entire trust control in their hands.... there has to be a reason *why them* and that's usually other compatibility 

[Clarakink]

I think it all comes down to the type of relationship you have with your sub.
If you know them well enough and they trust you to make the right decision on their behalf then it could be quite exciting for them to not know who the person would be.
But that would take time to get to that point.
In general though, I think both parties need to discuss who the 3rd person will be, but normally it's the Dom (female or male) that finds them.
Subs are entitled to a voice and opinion as they are human beings and individuals (I think that is sometimes forgotten), but ultimately as a Dom, the final decision will rest with me.
Is that because I'm a Dom or a woman? That's a question for another day!

[ge****]

29 minutes ago, Clarakink said:

I think it all comes down to the type of relationship you have with your sub.
If you know them well enough and they trust you to make the right decision on their behalf then it could be quite exciting for them to not know who the person would be.
But that would take time to get to that point.
In general though, I think both parties need to discuss who the 3rd person will be, but normally it's the Dom (female or male) that finds them.
Subs are entitled to a voice and opinion as they are human beings and individuals (I think that is sometimes forgotten), but ultimately as a Dom, the final decision will rest with me.
Is that because I'm a Dom or a woman? That's a question for another day!

Spot on and makes my point so much better than I did!!