Difference

[Not_Your_Kitten]

What's the difference on here between bdsm lovers and LTR(relationship)? Are both not " looking for a relationship"? Genuine question

[yo****]

No

[Ar****]

BDSM lovers could imply that you are only looking for play sessions or short-term dynamics, but I would suggest a more important distinction is that people looking for BDSM lovers are often just looking to connect with like-minded people socially, perhaps to engage in discussion and learn from/share ideas with or to find new potentials to attend events with platonically. That in turn is slightly different to networking or just seeking friendship.

[Deleted Member]

I'd interpret "BDSM lover" as someone looking for a play partner. Not a LTR.

[yo****]

2 minutes ago, inconceivable said:

I'd interpret "BDSM lover" as someone looking for a play partner. Not a LTR.

Correct

[Spriguns]

I am torn , I like aspects of BDSM , both I looking for a LTR , ad well. I cannot advice you , but wise words fom the posters above

[Not_Your_Kitten]

Ahh, i see, i see, thank you all for the information 😁

[myfaerie]

That's an interesting question and can only be answered by talking to people individually.
For me, most of my short-term lovers or BDSM partners tend to become my favorite long-term relationships as time goes on.
But not everyone wants that, or interprets the terminology with the same perspective, and so clear and honest discussion is always important for great sex.

[Not_Your_Kitten]

22 minutes ago, myfaerie said:

That's an interesting question and can only be answered by talking to people individually.
For me, most of my short-term lovers or BDSM partners tend to become my favorite long-term relationships as time goes on.
But not everyone wants that, or interprets the terminology with the same perspective, and so clear and honest discussion is always important for great sex.

Yeah because the way i read it was lovers as in partners but i realise it could also be read as people who love bdsm. The way it is written can be comfusing

[Mi****]

For me, a BDSM lover is someone I connect with for BDSM play and does not necessarily include a romantic element or other elements of a long term relationship. Do I have long term relationships with some of my BDSM lovers? Absolutely. But I don’t consider all of the connections I have with BDSM lovers to be long term relationships.
I’m sure there are also people who may have long term relationships with vanilla partners but who have BDSM lovers/play partners.
I’m sure different people interpret these terms uniquely. This is my perspective.

[Os****]

LTD = Long Term Dynamic

[Ki****]

I guess I misunderstood the term. To me, BDSM lovers implies a long term dynamic that is kink only, not pick up play. That would be NSA. Whereas a LTR is a typical dating relationship with kink. The word lovers is definitely romantic, just not necessarily a complete relationship in all aspects. 

[pa****]

LTR is separated for me by a romantic element
I’ve had LTRs that involve vanilla sex and BDSM partners that involve everything but penetrative sex
Penetration in the strictest sense (not oral, but pegging, anal and vaginal) is something I reserve for romantic LTR
Not necessarily on here but it would be me dream to combine that LTR with my kinks

[yo****]

@paddleinwetjeans interesting

[ny****]

To me the difference is someone looking for LTR is not open to play dates or play partners if there’s no chance of it developing into LTR. Using myself as an example, my preference is a LTR/LTD but I’m also open to play partners or even playing with attached women, etc until I find my long term baby girl.

[Jordan1337]

Judging by my own experience I can tell that LTR can include kinky life and fetishes but someone who is looking for kinky dates does not necessarily want to develop into LTR.

[ey****]

at it's simplest as well - just because two different people are looking for a relationship - doesn't mean that it's the same type of relationship