Carnelian2 Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 (edited) 6 hours ago, white_rose said: It's not easy being a submissive person in this world. That's why women, and men, like me, crave a Dom who can interpret for us and shield us, because we are strong but susceptible to *** because of our nature. This is so true, particularly in a World where fame and influence is promoted as the end game.. Edited January 8, 2020 by Carnelian2 Forgot to add my comments
Deleted Member Posted January 8, 2020 Author Posted January 8, 2020 2 hours ago, Carnelian2 said: This is so true, particularly in a World where fame and influence is promoted as the end game.. Yes. I think that's part of the problem on Fetlife.com, with people becoming sort of BDSM celebrites, trying to appear on their top page (Kinky & Popular). That suits fetishists who are exhibitionists but none of the submissive women I know fit into that category. Then people come to the site and see what's trending on the top page, which is basically porn and exhibitionism, and equate that with BDSM.
Deleted Member Posted January 8, 2020 Author Posted January 8, 2020 5 hours ago, wolf_girl32 said: Hi I don't usually coment on things but there is one thing I would like to add to this and that's there's quite a few doms who have let it go to their heads, I can't tell you the amount of times I have been contacted and referred to as a slave. Now I'm more a masochist then a sub so if they want me to submit then they have to earn it, so for them to not even bother looking at a profile or even leaning the difference speaks very poorly of them. I love this piece and think it pairs well with a piece I saw the other day about how a sub should approach a dom/me the respect has to go both ways Thanks wolf_girl32. I agree with you. Distinctions between being a sub, being a slave, being a bottom and being a masochist should be more widely understood. Sure, we sometimes crossover but the longer I'm in the BDSM community, the easier it is to see how these types of kinksters are really different kinds of people too. For instance, in the beginning, I assumed all submissive women were masochists. Not so. I have been a slave and a sub. Huge difference in your relationship with your Dominant/Master. I have been poly and been monogamous. It's when people make expectations without asking you first that problems arise.
Deleted Member Posted January 8, 2020 Author Posted January 8, 2020 4 hours ago, Donnykinkster said: .A quality true relationship in any scene be it vanilla or kink always starts with the foundation of friendship.For me anyway. THIS should be the Golden Rule of Kink.
Wo**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 I'm submissive, yes. I'm not a doormat or "easy" I am a slut but that doesn't mean promiscuous (not that there's anything with that, as long as it's safe) I am a brat but not spoilt. I am a masochist. I am shy, to an extent. I look to my Dom for guidance, comfort, discipline, fun, sex and friendship based on trust, honesty, communication and trust. I am strong, smart, sexy and wise (someone else's words) and I CHOOSE to submit. Submissives are some of the strongest people around.
qu**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 To a lot of men who get on here just because a woman maybe submissive, it's only to those they choose, not to just anyone, submission comes from friendship, respect, trust and love, and just because she may thanks but no thanks, show them the respect they deserve
Deleted Member Posted January 8, 2020 Author Posted January 8, 2020 A lot of people assume submissive = weak. I’ve always found the exact opposite to be true. A lot of the strongest people I know are submissives
Plumpie Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 Well i am newbie would love to get more ibfo keep posting 😁
saphy Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 What misconceptions are there surrounding submissive women??? Easy!.....and something that seems to be a recurring hackle raiser (even for the most submissive of us!) We are not 'told' what to do because we are incapable in ourselves to determine what we should or should not be doing. We merely follow our D's instructions to be pleasing to Him/Her. We do NOT live or are part of an abusive relationship. We consensually agree to participating in activities that in turn will heighten our sensual desires to ultimately find pleasure in play/scenes that aren't otherwise considered 'vanilla'. We are completely in control of our situations and are respected beyond reason. We are NOT weak individuals. An established D/s dynamic or BDSM relationship is nurturing, fulfilling and satisfying toward the needs of those involved. Similar in comparison to a 'vanilla' marriage. The emotional attachments that are formed and the bond that is created between the individuals is of a much deeper state than the aforementioned. We are NOT doormats to abusive partners! These are only a few of the most prominant definitions of being submissive according to the 'outside world', which understandably (as a submissive) gets you wanting to jump on your soapbox and right the wrongs of many. Hopefully one day the eyes of the world will be opened and people won't be so closed minded and judgemental and the submissive world will be seen and recognised for the beautiful lifestyle it is. 😊
Wo**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 9 minutes ago, saphy said: What misconceptions are there surrounding submissive women??? Easy!.....and something that seems to be a recurring hackle raiser (even for the most submissive of us!) We are not 'told' what to do because we are incapable in ourselves to determine what we should or should not be doing. We merely follow our D's instructions to be pleasing to Him/Her. We do NOT live or are part of an abusive relationship. We consensually agree to participating in activities that in turn will heighten our sensual desires to ultimately find pleasure in play/scenes that aren't otherwise considered 'vanilla'. We are completely in control of our situations and are respected beyond reason. We are NOT weak individuals. An established D/s dynamic or BDSM relationship is nurturing, fulfilling and satisfying toward the needs of those involved. Similar in comparison to a 'vanilla' marriage. The emotional attachments that are formed and the bond that is created between the individuals is of a much deeper state than the aforementioned. We are NOT doormats to abusive partners! These are only a few of the most prominant definitions of being submissive according to the 'outside world', which understandably (as a submissive) gets you wanting to jump on your soapbox and right the wrongs of many. Hopefully one day the eyes of the world will be opened and people won't be so closed minded and judgemental and the submissive world will be seen and recognised for the beautiful lifestyle it is. 😊 *bows down* Perfectly put.
Wo**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 8 minutes ago, tobegiven said: That they want ruff sex Erm...... I do 😊
fo**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 In my opinion ,its more about the mental work and reward .Combine that with a physical connection. A smart ,attractive,rational woman submitting to her Sir is sexy AF.In return she deserves guidance, loyalty,respect,honor and protection.A spiritual synergy with a better bond than most vanilla relationships.
tobegiven Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 15 minutes ago, LazyPiratesBounty said: Erm...... I do 😊 Naughty sub
Wo**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 Just now, tobegiven said: Naughty sub When i'm good i'm good. When i'm bad i'm awesome 😊
tobegiven Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 I just joined today so no idea who I am yet but like a bit of bad girls being punished
BigPolly Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 1 hour ago, saphy said: 😊 Eeeeek welcome back you! Hope your little one is bringing smiles xx
li**** Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 (edited) I think most people see submissives as like @Liam52 said as weak and treat us as if we are doormats and will do anything and everything just cause it's thought we are told to do it we will!!!!! We follow orders from our D's cause we want to, not cause we are pushed in to doing it and yes when I tell people that I'm in to BDSM and kink they think I'm being ***d and I can tell you now coming from myself who has been in an abusive relationship in the past I am 100% happy with my Sir and it's consensual when we play, in no way does he *** anything or make me feel uncomfortable or not happy. People forget that yes a Dom holds power but we as subs do also we have safe words and limits and can stop play at any time if we want. It should be 50/50 in the dynamic/relationship. Edited January 8, 2020 by Lilmonster
Master-007-3969 Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 I'd like to have an intelligent convo about this with you this evening...you game?
Master-007-3969 Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 22nd century Dom...is my project...I'll write a book.
Jed Posted January 8, 2020 Posted January 8, 2020 Submission=strength. Submissives aren't doormat's, they deserve respect and equality, they are bestowing a gift that deserves the utmost reverence, and it infuriates me to hear the lack of respect that's given in many cases. We live in a world where information is bountiful and relevant, yet too many fail to self educate and willfully neglect their so called position for nothing other than selfish greed. I cherish what I Have, it's taken time and effort...she deserves nothing less, and the rewards are plentiful, but knowing I have her trust, respect and commitment within the boundaries we have set together means so much more. Education is key, if more and more of these topics are brought to the floor the stronger we all are. I might add that the post could have been non specific on gender, men are no doubt experiencing the same ill educated views, would be good too hear their view points too. Great topic keep them coming.
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