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AlanGJ

First session with a pro Dom

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AlanGJ
Posted

Hi, I've been considering paying for my first ever session with a Pro Dom and have a few questions for people who have done this. The session I want revolves around a mistress strapping me into a body bag and giving me some electro CBT.  My head tells me that I'd be mad to voluntarily let somebody I've never met before tie me up like this but then I still keep thinking about doing it. Does anybody have any advice? Anyone got any stories from the first time they let a Pro Dom tie them up? Anyone been strapped into a body bag? What does it feel like when you first realise you trapped and at the mercy of somebody you've only just met? Anybody got any horror stories where a Dom has ignored the safe word and caused them serious pain or injury?

Cheers

  • Like 3
Posted
Nonononono...lol for a pro will be no passion..is a big nono unless you get a kick about paying....nothing wrong with that if is your scene. "Whatever tuen you on m8
eyemblacksheep
Posted

I disagree wildly that a Pro would lack passion.  I have many friends who also work as Pro and they're as into it as anyone else. 

However, tying in with my next point.

Research.

Does the Pro offer the things you want?  Do they have pictures and clips - either of something similar to what you want, or, even others you can get a "look and feel" for.  

I've been in a body bag once - and that was for breath play, so I was concealed in a body bag and then had a plastic bag over my head - and - yes, that was with a Pro, I'd just met. (that was part of a filming day) and... it was fun, but wasn't really my kink.  So, I didn't quite have the feeling of helplessness or anything like that.

I've been OK with people respecting my consent, but I've seen/heard horror stories - and, it's usually not the Pros breaking consent.  (exceptions apply)

 

  • Like 1
Posted
I also disagree that a Pro would lack passion, this is their buisiness & so they will probably want to be the best they can & one step ahead of the others. They are there to perform a service & probably want you to return so why would they be anything other than perfect!? I have never had a Pro Dom but I have gained much of my experiences from one-off or short-term play sessions where I don’t really know the Dom that well. This has caused heightened anticipation & therefore more pleasure knowing I am whole heartedly trusting someone I don’t know. I have also found for me that this means I quite often manage to swerve the Sub-drop & by walking away at the end of a session gives me great power as a sub. Just do your research & don’t deny yourself, we’re all here to gain new experiences & knowledge
Posted
1 hour ago, eyemblacksheep said:

I disagree wildly that a Pro would lack passion.  I have many friends who also work as Pro and they're as into it as anyone else. 

However, tying in with my next point.

Research.

Does the Pro offer the things you want?  Do they have pictures and clips - either of something similar to what you want, or, even others you can get a "look and feel" for.  

I've been in a body bag once - and that was for breath play, so I was concealed in a body bag and then had a plastic bag over my head - and - yes, that was with a Pro, I'd just met. (that was part of a filming day) and... it was fun, but wasn't really my kink.  So, I didn't quite have the feeling of helplessness or anything like that.

I've been OK with people respecting my consent, but I've seen/heard horror stories - and, it's usually not the Pros breaking consent.  (exceptions apply)

 

Huuuu....plastic bag...i am claustrophobic..

I would bw dead before hard on.lol. But yours is a point well taken.

AlanGJ
Posted

So, is seeing a Pro Dom considered 'safe' in that they are going to respect your limits and provide what you want? I want to be as certain as possible that I'll be able to walk away at the end of a session with only the memory and everything I arrived with in one piece plus no photos or video evidence! The idea of seeing a Pro Dom is more appealing to me because I feel that that I could trust a professional more than somebody I met through the internet and I like the idea of privacy and knowing you can walk away at the end of the session with no ties.

eyemblacksheep
Posted

pro's - there is no hive mind.  

How I would compose an email in your situation

"Hello *Dominant Name with title - i.e. Mistress X, Miss Y, Princess Z

I am fairly new to BDSM and am looking to booking my first session ever.    I have a fantasy/interest around this scenario...  *explain scenario, but not too in depth

Because I am new I am aware there's a risk this might not be the experience that I imagined, so do you have any issue with me playing with safeword?

Would this sort of session be of interest for you to take?   If so, my preferred date is *preferred date* or if you have any other availability that could work.

I understand you require a deposit for new clients.   I am happy to arrange this if you can confirm interest and availability,

All the best"

 

This keeps things concise but to the point.  It mentions your experience levels and your interests. It also doesn't attempt to big yourself up and whilst you are placing a request it does set the picture that your interest is around playing through a fantasy - you're not saying you're something you're not. (or, not in this instance)

Not every Pro requires a deposit (check their website) but being forthcoming with this is more likely to be received that you're new but genuine.  If you agree a date/time in principle - once you've paid the deposit it may be possible to speak more about "what we will do" - but, sometimes some of the best part is the anticipation and surprise of not knowing.  She might ask if you have other interests - but yeah.

Also, pros do respect client discretion - there's often pictures of me all over the internet when I play (a lovely one went up yesterday from filming) but then I'm a slut.

Overall, i wouldn't say pros are more or less trustworthy - but - it is more likely to be able to be arranged.  Because, they are compensated for their time and are more likely to have access to a suitable premises and suitable equipment.


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