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Normalizing Kink


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If you could normalize one thing about kink dynamics in everyday conversation, what would it be?

I’d normalize foot fetish… I know many men have one, but very very rarely talk about it or admit it.

Masturbating. People specifically women should explore and become more familiar with themselves so they are able to communicate to a partner what they like/dislike, etc. some haven’t taken a mirror to look at their kitty, literally having no clue what it looks at all.

Consent.

Consent is truly lacking as a concept in civil society. Understanding consent is important as the first step to sovereignity. Understanding and exercising sovereignty in your life gives you power, power to move, power to voice, power to act, power to collaborate. Power to stop injustice.

And if you're sharp in rhe kink world, you understand consent intimately.

Privacy laws claim to give you consent power, but most people don't understand consent besides clicking 'allow' or 'reject' when accessing a website.

Its relative normalcy. I think it's a sign of trust and openness to be able to have such conversations, even on a purely platonic-bordering-aesthetic/artistic level. If that extent of human trust were more widely cultivated, it'd be nice for some.

Elephant in the room: some people are malicious actors, by happenstance or by design. It begs a different question of *why* we're less open than we could be, but the answer is likely one that males tending toward dominant energies may understand less often without experience.

To stop calling them kinks. That word separates normal from abnormal

I would normalise using terms like Mistress and Master around other people, rather than having to tone it back around “normal” people

That kink doesn’t mean casual sex. The amount of “men” that expect the kink from people they aren’t in a relationship is crazy. And disgusting

5 hours ago, DanTienDomD said:

Consent.

Consent is truly lacking as a concept in civil society. Understanding consent is important as the first step to sovereignity. Understanding and exercising sovereignty in your life gives you power, power to move, power to voice, power to act, power to collaborate. Power to stop injustice.

And if you're sharp in rhe kink world, you understand consent intimately.

Privacy laws claim to give you consent power, but most people don't understand consent besides clicking 'allow' or 'reject' when accessing a website.

This. 100 times this. It's the one thing that is so valuable irrespective of whether one is kinky or not and that is sorely missing in society and regular sexual education.

Be kinky doesn’t mean that you can not be a normal person and be a fantastic partner for a long term relationship. Just because we meet in a kinky place doesn’t mean that I will be less respectful on a real date than a vanilla person from Hinge.

I'm going to second for consent. 

that, I still feel there's a lot of stuff in sex and relationships which can learn a lot from good consent practices in kink.  

I'm gonna go with open and honest conversations. Simply being able to have open and honest conversations with others adults in the world without it being considered taboo could open so many doors. Everything from communicating consent between two people to understanding wants and or expectations to allowing others to understand the dynamics of different people's lives in a more complete way instead of making assumptions.

Kinks are not normal, but thats the point, and its ok to be different or weird. If something is normalized, its not really a kink anymore, itd eventually just be considered Vanilla. Anal used to be considered so hardcore that were (and still are) some laws banning it. These days I think most women (who dont even consider themselves in this lifestyle) have tried it and liked it at least on rare occasions. People get bored with Vanilla, then say 'lets think of some crazy new shit', and thats how kinks are born. Judgement from the public shouldnt stop anyone, and if anything, acts being taboo can make them more exciting. It feels like youre getting away with something (though its actually ok). dont feel ashamed of what other people think of you...unless shame is your kink, i guess...in which case, oh, my god, you little pervert! How dare you?

I realize my previous reply is more to the general conversation/kinks, whereas OP is more specifically asking about 'kink dynamics'. I guess one example we could make...should it be normalized to say 'my dom/master/mistress' the way people say 'my husband/wife/girlfriend' in general conversation. Its a fun thought experiment. Many would be shocked or have a million nosey/curious questions. Its hard to object to making these titles/dynamics socially acceptable when husband/girlfriend is basically the same. We all understand uf someone says 'wife' or 'boyfriend', that is their S.O./life partner/sex partner and no one bats an eye. Say 'dom' or 'sub' and everyone would lose their shit even though its still just their S.O./life partner/sex partner. That probably should be fine, but bf/gf works, why raise hell? I dont think it needs to get more specific in dynamics. For everyday conversation, 'boyfriend' works just as well as 'free use tickle princess'. I think its more fun to keep your private kinks private. I like walking around in public knowing i have a secret kinky life and no one is the wiser.

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