Advice

[bl****]

So I’m new to the community but I’ve been self-conscious about my appearance throughout my life and grew up very sheltered. Being open to endless possibilities in this exiting world, my question is, who are the best people to meet up with when you are afraid about your outward appearance no matter how you look?

[sl****]

Forget about your appearance, that's not what this is about. This is about having a good time with people. Enjoying yourself getting laid in some sort of form, whether it's mental, physical or damn well intense, it's your imagination, your abilities and your wants that matter. Yes, physical attributes are nice that don't solve everybody's problems. It does make it for fun, but you know, it also makes for fun. Is your imagination seeing what you see? Your eyes are for you and your you are the beholder of them and they are the beholder of theirs. They could see more in you than you could see who knows you might find that perfect one person or that ten perfect people be yourself.My friend enjoy yourself accept yourself

[vikingpup]

Frankly there isn't such a "group" of people. There isn't any role who is better at making you feel better safer or more accepted. It's going to be an individual thing. I totally get what you're feeling and talking about, and I wish that there was a group of "these people" who are better for that. But there's plenty of great nice people, and terrible people, in every area.

[an****]

Welcome home. If you are able. Describe what exactly you are self conscious about and your sheltered conditions. This will help us identify how best to guide you.

[jj****]

I’m on the opposite end of the spectrum - my body is riddled with scars, stretch marks, old burns, etc. And I am frankly tired of hearing about it.

I have led a very full, very unsheltered life and I am not a delicate flower. I either meet people who are visibly bothered or people who think I want to cry about each fucking scar on my body.

I share this because you aren’t alone feeling self conscious about your history. I think everyone is a little bit. All that means is you fit right in.

[sn****]

Dude honestly? Confidence is the whole game.
You can be the hotter guy, richer guy, smarter guy, more experienced guy, bigger cock, nicer car, all of it. Doesn’t matter. The guy that’s comfortable being himself wins. Every fucking time.
Especially w/ BDSM. People are way more attracted to energy, presence, honesty, calmness, and someone who owns who they are than some perfectly polished image.
Most people aren’t judging you nearly as hard as you’re judging yourself. Half the people that seem “out of your league” are just people who stopped apologizing for existing.
You don’t need to walk in like some alpha bro. That shit usually reads insecure immediately (imo). Just be real dawg. Be respectful. Be open. Be confident enough to laugh at yourself and not crumble over every insecurity.
That alone will put you ahead of a massive amount of people. A friend of mine says “walk in with a hard dick” (METAPHORICALLY-cant stress that enough lol). Kinda silly but for some reason it stuck with me. Maybe it helps you too? Haha 😅 good luck out there bro! You got this! 💪🏼

[mo****]

Came for the comments. And it did not let me down! 💚

[pr****]

Join the Swinging community, start going to swingers club, Nude beach not to partake at first but just to be around like minds… you will see a lot that will make you understand that we are unique in our different shapes and sizes, and start recording yourself when having sex and watch it later…. I was once like that 😊😊

[pr****]

There will always be someone with a better body, better dick, better stroke game you can’t have it all.. Life is not balance and can never be… A confident man with 5 inches dick outshines a 9 inch dick with no Confidence and Charisma.

[Bi****]

Learn to like yourself! You might not have the looks that you think is the right.
Change your mind, Not your appearance. There are people out there that would be happy to be you and people who would be happy to be with you.

[Bi****]

Anyone can be confident in less than a year. Give up soda and sweets. Eat healthy and work out for 20 mins a day. Get a pull up bar and focus on getting your first. Then get 5. Then 10. In one year you can leave your old self goodbye. Fitness doesn’t happen overnight but if you do 20 mins a day. In 3 months you’ll be addicted to the changes.

[Bi****]

1 hour ago, BigChanges said:

Anyone can be confident in less than a year. Give up soda and sweets. Eat healthy and work out for 20 mins a day. Get a pull up bar and focus on getting your first. Then get 5. Then 10. In one year you can leave your old self goodbye. Fitness doesn’t happen overnight but if you do 20 mins a day. In 3 months you’ll be addicted to the changes.

As if self confidence is only related to your physical appearance.
Working out surely helps though, as it helps to focus on yourself and settle old issues.

[bl****]

Thanks everyone for the support and friendly advice. Sometimes these things can be a struggle but I feel like it’s time to finally break out of that rut. It’s time to start feeling good about myself again.

[Bi****]

49 minutes ago, BiginBerlin said:

As if self confidence is only related to your physical appearance.
Working out surely helps though, as it helps to focus on yourself and settle old issues.

No but it can be a catalyst for anyone who isn’t loving themselves. If you have to start somewhere I say start on your body. If your confidence level is 10/100 today. If you put a year of work and discipline in. So many things happen. Less shitty food means healthier choices. More activity means more mobility. More mobility and cleaner diet means harder erections and increased libido. Once you see changes you’ll shave those spots you haven’t in a while. You stand up straighter. You are no longer lazy. At the end of one year. There is a 0% chance your confidence remains at 10/100 or less. You will indeed end that year feeling better about yourself than ever. But it takes work. Took me from 2020 and staying very disciplined. Anyway. I didn’t claim it’s everything. It was advice to stop feeling self conscious. I gave him a recipe with 100% probable results. The problem is many people just don’t have that drive.

[Pr****]

Accept yourself for who you are or present a well tailored mask if who you want to be. Either one, as long as you respect the other person.

[sn****]

BigChanges & BiginBerlin are actually both right. People underestimate how much confidence comes from proving to yourself you can do hard shit consistently. Gym helps because it rewires your brain from ‘I can’t’ to ‘watch me.’ But yeah if your confidence ONLY comes from looks, one bad year and the whole tower collapses

[ChocolateRopeBunny]

I would suggest you start taking yourself out on dates. No pressure of meeting up with anyone and needing to perform or "be on". Just you enjoying yourself and being comfortable in your own skin around other people all having a good time. Once you get comfortable then start hitting munches and some classes. Again no pressure to have a partner. Just more like minded folks that want to talk and be around each other. You'll start meeting friends and you'll start getting comfortable with those in the community around you and they with you.

[un****]

9 hours ago, snafy said:

Dude honestly? Confidence is the whole game.
You can be the hotter guy, richer guy, smarter guy, more experienced guy, bigger cock, nicer car, all of it. Doesn’t matter. The guy that’s comfortable being himself wins. Every fucking time.
Especially w/ BDSM. People are way more attracted to energy, presence, honesty, calmness, and someone who owns who they are than some perfectly polished image.
Most people aren’t judging you nearly as hard as you’re judging yourself. Half the people that seem “out of your league” are just people who stopped apologizing for existing.
You don’t need to walk in like some alpha bro. That shit usually reads insecure immediately (imo). Just be real dawg. Be respectful. Be open. Be confident enough to laugh at yourself and not crumble over every insecurity.
That alone will put you ahead of a massive amount of people. A friend of mine says “walk in with a hard dick” (METAPHORICALLY-cant stress that enough lol). Kinda silly but for some reason it stuck with me. Maybe it helps you too? Haha 😅 good luck out there bro! You got this! 💪🏼

This is the deal!

Try to lean into the traits of yourself that you like. If they match the above advice, you're on a roll.

[ma****]

This community will probably help if you let it. I came in self conscious of my breasts and how my face blushes. I was amazed how many men love my breasts and think I am beautiful. It has helped me out of this community. There is always someone who thinks your hated attributes are the sexiest parts in the world.