Are neurodivergents drawn more toward domination or submission?

[ar****]

I wonder if someone can make a link with Alexithymia in all of this? I figure, since it's more common in people on the spectrum, it may also relate to the way in which intimacy is experienced. And if you can't really "trust/know" your feels, relating with a clearly defined (logical) role & rules gives confidence that the parameters of the interaction are agreed upon. So there's less worry, and less need to mask. Allowing one to be authentic without worrying about (living up to) social conventions. Or being judged.

[Ni****]

I can see this being a major plus

[un****]

2 hours ago, OrigenBlack said:

Yeah ADHD here and switch (I think, still need to explore sub)

Same but opposite. I'm trying to learn as a sub, so when I'm ready to be a switch (which I know I will be, because I love variety more than anything else), I'll have my sub experiences to continually guide/connect to/inform my Dom performance.

[NowIAmTheMaster]

So I'm ADHD too, late diagnosed, but involved in the scene since I was about 20 and the diagnosis unlocked so much understanding and appreciation for what kink has brought my life. And from what I've seen discussed in this post, there are a lot of shared experiences that resonate hard with me too!

 

I'm also formerly a scientific researcher and became curious about whether there's a link between being ND and kinky as the munches I've been to in all this time looks like the pancake stack of a venn diagram that is people into kink and people with ND.

 

There have been at least 3 studies I've found through pubmed that show a link, but I think they were small sample pathfinding studies aimed at laying a foundation for larger sample sized longitudinal studies. I've been hit with a ban hammer before for sharing links to external sites on here so my RSD won't allow me to do that again. Buuut if you were to type the following into a Google search bar you might find the studies in referring to...

 

University of York: Intersections of Kink and Autism

Sexual Health Alliance: Overlap Between Kink and Neurodivergence

A Qualitative Exploration of Engaging in BDSM (2024)

 

TL:DR Yeah it seems like it's absolutely a thing, but more robust studies are needed to be definitive.

Edited May 11 by NowIAmTheMaster
Cut out erroneous word caused but grabbing phone when I dropped it as I posted!

[Ca****]

Personally I am drawn to submission, but I'm not sure the question is valid ND is anyone whose brain isn't wired up the "normal" way whatever that maybe and therefore it could be anything and so generalisation is probably pointless .

[jj****]

4 hours ago, CastityPleasureGiver said:

Personally I am drawn to submission, but I'm not sure the question is valid ND is anyone whose brain isn't wired up the "normal" way whatever that maybe and therefore it could be anything and so generalisation is probably pointless .

That was a pointless comment. If you have nothing to contribute, stay silent.

[jj****]

6 hours ago, NowIAmTheMaster said:

So I'm ADHD too, late diagnosed, but involved in the scene since I was about 20 and the diagnosis unlocked so much understanding and appreciation for what kink has brought my life. And from what I've seen discussed in this post, there are a lot of shared experiences that resonate hard with me too!

 

I'm also formerly a scientific researcher and became curious about whether there's a link between being ND and kinky as the munches I've been to in all this time looks like the pancake stack of a venn diagram that is people into kink and people with ND.

 

There have been at least 3 studies I've found through pubmed that show a link, but I think they were small sample pathfinding studies aimed at laying a foundation for larger sample sized longitudinal studies. I've been hit with a ban hammer before for sharing links to external sites on here so my RSD won't allow me to do that again. Buuut if you were to type the following into a Google search bar you might find the studies in referring to...

 

University of York: Intersections of Kink and Autism

Sexual Health Alliance: Overlap Between Kink and Neurodivergence

A Qualitative Exploration of Engaging in BDSM (2024)

 

TL:DR Yeah it seems like it's absolutely a thing, but more robust studies are needed to be definitive.

Yeah, this doesn’t surprise me! I’m just now going through comments to see what other people think 😋 It’s hard to get into specifics with these sorts of soft topics, but I have been seeing patterns! It has me curious

[jj****]

11 hours ago, MsRed32514 said:

I think the openness, clear communication, boundaries, make it easier for the neurodivergent brain, that tends to lean towards seeing things black and white, rather than grey areas. Like someone prior mentioned, clarity leads to the ability to fully walk into the role. If its unclear, I have a hard time getting into subspace or domspace. Im neurodivergent and a switch, for me its my connection to the other person determines my interactions with them. Often I can only be one or the other with each person. Only a couple times I have been able to switch roles with a partner, during play.

I’m also switchy. It would be interesting to see the breakdown of this. It seems like people who are autistic tend to lean on the subbier side, but I just don’t have enough actual data to say that with any kind of confidence.

[Ni****]

6 minutes ago, jjbeanbun said:

I’m also switchy. It would be interesting to see the breakdown of this. It seems like people who are autistic tend to lean on the subbier side, but I just don’t have enough actual data to say that with any kind of confidence.

This would be absolutely fascinating survey 500 or so people and see what they say 

[Ca****]

2 hours ago, jjbeanbun said:

That was a pointless comment. If you have nothing to contribute, stay silent.

As someone who is ND albeit acquired Neurodivergent rather than the more typical innate Neurodivergent like most I thought my opinion would be valid . Neurodivergent people are statistically much more likely to identify as LGBTQ+ and engage in kink however a particular flavour no . Imagine the bell curve NT make up the high middle part with ND being the two pointy ends, as such there is potentially far more difference between two ND than NT and ND people , despite this ND like myself often find it easier to talk to another ND than NT .

[Ca****]

8 minutes ago, CastityPleasureGiver said:

As someone who is ND albeit acquired Neurodivergent rather than the more typical innate Neurodivergent like most I thought my opinion would be valid . Neurodivergent people are statistically much more likely to identify as LGBTQ+ and engage in kink however a particular flavour no . Imagine the bell curve NT make up the high middle part with ND being the two pointy ends, as such there is potentially far more difference between two ND than NT and ND people , despite this ND like myself often find it easier to talk to another ND than NT .

I'll just add a s I'm acquired Neurodivergent and have an NT twin brother we both went through more tests , brain scans etc than is typical to try and understand the relationship better

[Ni****]

9 minutes ago, CastityPleasureGiver said:

As someone who is ND albeit acquired Neurodivergent rather than the more typical innate Neurodivergent like most I thought my opinion would be valid . Neurodivergent people are statistically much more likely to identify as LGBTQ+ and engage in kink however a particular flavour no . Imagine the bell curve NT make up the high middle part with ND being the two pointy ends, as such there is potentially far more difference between two ND than NT and ND people , despite this ND like myself often find it easier to talk to another ND than NT .

Interesting why do you think that ND people are more likely to be LGBTQ+ genuinely asking

[Ca****]

I've no idea but it's not a little bit higher it's a lot higher and findings are consistent over multiple studies .

[Qu****]

15 hours ago, JoeFrankenstein said:

I think ND people are just generally drawn to D/S dynamics, if we could get a proper poll, I’m sure the results might favor one, but I think it’d actually be pretty close between Dom and Sub preferences amongst neurodivergent people.
Reasoning:
For Doms- laying out structure and rules that make you happy, that someone else is enthusiastically following. Creating and enacting plans. Putting to use one’s high attention to details like a partner’s body language, vocal tone changes, and stimuli-response.
For subs- taking a brain-break, having structure and rules to live by with someone else’s guidance & assistance, being able to ground and focus on a single sensation.
For either- BDSM is centered around clear communication, trust, and boundaries. Also, theres often a roleplay aspect, ND people love roleplay.

Yes, I’m autistic, and also a switch.

For me and my neurospicy brain, I like to have variance, which is why I tend to switch.

[Ni****]

2 minutes ago, QueenSensei9000 said:

For me and my neurospicy brain, I like to have variance, which is why I tend to switch.

I love the term Neurospicy

[Ni****]

I think I’d be a switch once I got some experience being a sub

[Qu****]

13 hours ago, MasterAidan said:

yea I know about that, but also I’m just not into being a sub lol, its just not who I am, and not what I feel comfortable with, also like you don’t really know anything about me so please don’t assume and please respect my boundaries, I know very well the affects of bdsm on trauma, and I don’t have ptsd or anything I don’t think, I’ve just been through stuff. I’m neurodivergent because of the way my brain is already wired, and I’m more naturally dominant especially in person just because the way I am.

Back off. Lea-Marie was just providing information, which i very much appreciated.
And maybe you should Google ptsd so you remember that the T stands for Trauma.

[Ro****]

I'm diagnosed autistic and I'm a dominant leaning switch. Probably because I value clear direct communication and I don't get shy about what I have to say or want.

[Qu****]

2 hours ago, CastityPleasureGiver said:

I'll just add a s I'm acquired Neurodivergent and have an NT twin brother we both went through more tests , brain scans etc than is typical to try and understand the relationship better

What do you mean when you say "acquired ND"? How does one acquire neurodivergence?

[Ca****]

Innate ND is from birth acquired from brain *** or trauma

[Ca****]

In jury. - not sure why it's censored

[jj****]

Ha, I’m digging that there are people thinking about this topic now. I can’t turn off the social scientist brain even though I haven’t published any research in a loooong time. It’s kinda fun to think of how nature/nurture influences our personalities and the things we like. It’s a kinda nice way to feel connected to other people 🧐

[Ca****]

ND is an umbrella term for a whole host of conditions, people can be NT or ND diagnosed or otherwise all their lives , under certain circumstances people can move from ND - NT and in some instances back to ND .

[Fo****]

As a neuordivergent switch, I dunno if cant make up my mind 😂

[Qu****]

15 hours ago, Day0815 said:

Hit the nail on the head with that one. I'm a switch and have diagnosed and medicated ADHD, plus probably hanging out on the spectrum somewhere, and all of that is dead on for me.

Hmm, that makes me wonder... I am undiagnosed but the ND markers are all there. However, what you said about being adhd and a switch has me mentally amending the og question. Perhaps what we should be asking is do different types of nd's lean a direction? Such as, are ADHDers more likely to be switchy, etc.

Tho I may be an AudHD, I'd be curious to hear from other adhds about their preference