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Munch advice


Da****

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A munch is an social gathering event that a group sets up at a public place like a diner,coffee shop, bar, etc.

I run a lifestyle(swinger/poly) facebook group in ohio and we do a coffee brunch munch every 3rd sunday in Columbus

You're welcome. If you're on fetlife just look up your town and go to events and theres probably a few munches and meet and greets

Fetlife will be no better. Outsiders are not welcome, more so single guys. There is a code munches are play circle groups who converse with each other if you are not apart of any groups they will ignore you and even pretend not to remember who you are. good luck the doms on there Don't share one word and you might as well be sitting with your partner by yourselves.

We'll like i say to everyone experiences may differ and while that is your experience thats not how theirs will go because they arent you. They might be more confident or charismatic than you or I hate to even use this reason but they might be more attractive, appealing, or better dressed for the occasion because that also plays a big role in how the crowd at these events respond to you. Thats why the best advice I can give is dress to impress be confident and be a social butterfly

These are casual munches, and I dressed up just fine it was a choice to exclude me, not how i was dressed, while there was one person who was advocating for the inclusion of new people to the group while she was active it was fine had plenty of conversations with folks but the min she left do to having her consent Violated I ceased to exisist and no one could remember my name that had nothing to do with confidence or charisma or dress.

Its full on High school social rules and they suck My advice is to find some folks outside those groups and make friends with them cause those groups don't include new people, only new subs for the dom.

Exactly. Not every group is like that just gotta find the right one. And everyone's experience is gonna be vastly different than another's.

22 minutes ago, Vagabond23 said:

Dumb question... but can someone explain what a Munch is to me?

I don't ever comment on these, but I was just wondering this same f-in thing lol

21 minutes ago, Ur_stoner420 said:

I don't ever comment on these, but I was just wondering this same f-in thing lol

It’s like a meet up for people in pre agreed location with other ppl in the kink community. I don’t like them. They make me uncomfortable too: cliques and not the good kind of perverts. That’s just my experience I only been to a couple and I hated every second

Being somebody that also feels kind of out of the loop when I bother to show up at a munch, I CAN say that "cliques" is an absolutely normal thing for humans to create with others they are around regularly. I don't care to try to wedge myself into one, so I don't usually go to things like that, but it's a normal phenomenon and if you *want* to stop feeling like a third wheel the only real answer is to embrace whatever extrovert energy you can and show uo regularly. Eventually, you'll be a part of the group. It's all a matter of whether or not it's worth the time and effort to you.

19 minutes ago, Bhelliom42 said:

Being somebody that also feels kind of out of the loop when I bother to show up at a munch, I CAN say that "cliques" is an absolutely normal thing for humans to create with others they are around regularly. I don't care to try to wedge myself into one, so I don't usually go to things like that, but it's a normal phenomenon and if you *want* to stop feeling like a third wheel the only real answer is to embrace whatever extrovert energy you can and show uo regularly. Eventually, you'll be a part of the group. It's all a matter of whether or not it's worth the time and effort to you.

Pretty much. It took my 5 or 6 times of going to our local lifestyle club to feel normal and mingle with the regular crowd

Walk up to someone in the group and pay them a genuine compliment. People love talking about themselves. Then introduce yourself with a first name.

What is a munch? Im a woman and dont like other females to be around at all. Would this be a problem?

7 minutes ago, KittyCatsRthebest said:

What is a munch? Im a woman and dont like other females to be around at all. Would this be a problem?

A munch is a social gathering typically in a socially vanilla environment like a bar or food place for people to meet like minded individuals for networking and community purposes

12 hours ago, Daddyferg678 said:

My partner and I went to a munch last night and the munch was obviously an established group of regulars that attend regular events at 'the playground'. They are all very familiar with each other and have their own cliques, alot like high school lol. Well as we know high school SUCKED especially for neurodivergent people. Mostly we just stood around like the weird uncle in the corner at family reunions. Any munch advice?

I guess a first thing is that some munches do actually... I won't say suck, but, for whatever reason end up not being as welcoming to newcomers as they could be.  Especially when they have established friend groups and want to catch up or scene plan or whatever. 

though, a lot of this can be human nature especially as for most regulars, the purpose is socialising with friends.

So some bits on what can help

- arrive early. Not like pre start time, but as close to start time as possible. A liklihood of fewer people to deal with and more chance to speak with the organiser or people as they arrive

- acceot it can be difficult to break into conversations and spend time listening, interjecting when appropriate.  Over time you will be more included

- Try other munches in the area.  

Try a different munch. Most are very welcoming. However, I have definitely experienced the cliques as well, and decided not to attend their munches again. I even gave them a second chance and even introduced myself and my submissive and were ignored immediately after.

Where the hell do you guys live that you have more than one munch option within a reasonable distance?

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