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1 minute ago, Connobuckley1 said:

Where are you from?

Rural Kentucky. So honestly it’s less this apps fault, and more lack of kink population

2 minutes ago, Connobuckley1 said:

What is treasure hunting exactly?

I just gave you a treasure icon so it would be easier to find. Everyday during a treasure hunt, Fet Mods drop a clue as to where you can find an icon hiding in the app.

I've been struggling with loneliness for a long time now. I struggle to get anyone to respond to message. I struggle to get a date. Its probably been near a year since I've been able to find anyone to go on a simple date with me. No one ever sends me a message first.

4 minutes ago, Connobuckley1 said:

Are there any kinksters active on this app from New Jersey? Have you encountered any?

Oh I’m certain there are, but I’ve not noticed bc I just look for those close to me

3 hours ago, Fruitful-Kit said:

Wow reallt who would have guessed the platform for fetishist have weird people on it!! Wow such a surprise 😒. Doesn't excuse them being sexual, sending dick picks, people being weird, ect, with in seconds of messaging unless the other person gives off that vibe, and says its okay, they shouldnt be being weird, hell my my profile doesnt give off that vibe of me being instantly okay with people being disrespectful and sending dick pics and others. Its a fetish site, but one with REAL PEOPLE USING.

Agreed lol unsolicited dick pics are not ok.

47 minutes ago, Connobuckley1 said:

Has that been going well for you? Have you had any luck?

As I mentioned prior, it has not. But, there’s not a large dating pool in my area and I’m extremely selective

Me being perceived differently than what I meant, I say exactly what I mean don't look above or below it, is one of the biggest struggles in my life. And my kinkS just make it worse. Usually because someone already has their mind set on why THEY THINK you do something, hell just ask I can tell you exactly why I do/need what I do. And usually can give examples, trauma examples, etc. Ask, don't twist my response to mean what you want it to.

Yes, I know exactly what you’re describing. It ***s me to have to decide to censor my blunt and straightforward nature or face mental fatigue from wondering if my words were not received correctly. For the sake of trying to have pleasure, it has been a struggle in and out of the bedroom.


I tend to be a very genuine and openly appreciative person, but have had issues with the other person being afraid that I was getting emotionally invested.

Can’t anyone accept positive feedback spoken truthfully without worrying that it’s a ploy for commitment? I just want like minded connections and kindred friends. To be appreciate the matches for what they are, and I don’t mean LTR! I said exactly what I meant and meant exactly what I said!

11 hours ago, Connobuckley1 said:

What kind of man do you find interest in?

Please stay on topic

9 hours ago, archdale35440 said:

Me being perceived differently than what I meant, I say exactly what I mean don't look above or below it, is one of the biggest struggles in my life. And my kinkS just make it worse. Usually because someone already has their mind set on why THEY THINK you do something, hell just ask I can tell you exactly why I do/need what I do. And usually can give examples, trauma examples, etc. Ask, don't twist my response to mean what you want it to.

💯👏👏

It may or may not be kink related perse, but have you tried joining events like a Tantra S***d Date/Dance or Ecstatic Dance?

I found that during these kinds of events, people are relating/connecting in a way that bypasses (neurotypical need for) words.

In my experience, that allows yourself to feel less need to be (socially) masking performatively, which frees up your processing to feel and focus on the energy between partners.

If you feel lonely, maybe those events can be helpful to find people who you might still resonate with - or at the very least provide a couple of fun/intimate hours. ✌️

1 hour ago, arnhem961 said:

It may or may not be kink related perse, but have you tried joining events like a Tantra S***d Date/Dance or Ecstatic Dance?

I found that during these kinds of events, people are relating/connecting in a way that bypasses (neurotypical need for) words.

In my experience, that allows yourself to feel less need to be (socially) masking performatively, which frees up your processing to feel and focus on the energy between partners.

If you feel lonely, maybe those events can be helpful to find people who you might still resonate with - or at the very least provide a couple of fun/intimate hours. ✌️

Yeah I’m not a fan of crowds or strangers touching me

Yeah, I also am not a fan of crowds. Fortunately, the events I went to were 30 people max, and the dancing venue had enough spots to regulate away from the main crowd.

The S***d Date I went to was special for me, because it didn't involve the whole crowd at once - people were stationed 1-on-1, and I was able to block out the other people because I was only focused on my partner.

Only 4-5 exercises explicitly involved touching (holding hand, touching heart, massage, hug, leaning back to back), the rest was more along the lines of opening up about desires, vulnerability, things that bring joy.

It was always possible to opt out of any exercise that made you uncomfortable, but I wanted to experience the full thing to see if it would cross any boundary of mine. Turns out, I was very relaxed the whole evening. I would wish such comfort to anyone, but I totally get that some (ND) people are touch averse especially with strangers. And crowds can be overwhelming.

48 minutes ago, arnhem961 said:

Yeah, I also am not a fan of crowds. Fortunately, the events I went to were 30 people max, and the dancing venue had enough spots to regulate away from the main crowd.

The S***d Date I went to was special for me, because it didn't involve the whole crowd at once - people were stationed 1-on-1, and I was able to block out the other people because I was only focused on my partner.

Only 4-5 exercises explicitly involved touching (holding hand, touching heart, massage, hug, leaning back to back), the rest was more along the lines of opening up about desires, vulnerability, things that bring joy.

It was always possible to opt out of any exercise that made you uncomfortable, but I wanted to experience the full thing to see if it would cross any boundary of mine. Turns out, I was very relaxed the whole evening. I would wish such comfort to anyone, but I totally get that some (ND) people are touch averse especially with strangers. And crowds can be overwhelming.

This might work for dating, but not when one is looking for lifestyle play partners..

I never mentioned dating

2 minutes ago, Kit_Kinks said:

This might work for dating, but not when one is looking for lifestyle play partners..

I never mentioned dating

You indeed didn't - I figured you feeling lonely and isolated wasn't only lifestyle related, but in general. My bad!

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