CopperKnob Posted November 4, 2021 Posted November 4, 2021 As in easy peasy lemon squeezy. I mean, to make rules, dish out orders, tie us up and spank us every now and again, its easy, right? If I was a Dom, there’s no way I’d be able to toe the line between selfishness and selflessness that I and so many subs crave. We rightfully ask for both, but I'd be screwed if I needed to deliver such conflicting states of being. The problem is that, in my eyes, a sexy Dom is one who can achieve both, and as impossible as that would be for me, I still want it from a partner. I love a selfish Dom. I adore a man who knows what he wants and takes it without caring about what I want, but at the same time, I also know what happens when a Dom makes himself the priority in all areas of your shared life. When your health, work, and relationship needs aren’t considered by you or your him, chaos and heartbreak are only a second away. The sexiest traits in The History of BDSM According to Me are; The ability to take. But also, not take too much. Or too often. And also to give. But not all the time. And not too much. And also have ethics… but drop those ethics every so often. Only the right ones, though. Please don’t get this one wrong. Some ethics are meant to be permanent. Be devious and sadistic, but also cuddly and caring. Don’t give a duck about me, but do give a duck about me. What I want isn’t that hard is it? For someone who can balance on the line of being selfish and selfless simultaneously. Is that so much to ask for? I feel sorry for my next Dom. I really do. I feel sorry for all of your Doms, too. Their role is so much more complicated than mine. All I need to do is deliver great blowjobs and do what I’m told every now and again. You Doms? You literally need the patience of a Saint and a ridiculous sense of balance to find your centre. It would be enough to scare me away from kink for life.
Ba**** Posted November 4, 2021 Posted November 4, 2021 Thank you for your insight. From a Don’s point of view, it’s very revealing into a sub’s psyche.
Ar**** Posted November 4, 2021 Posted November 4, 2021 I have no doubt that your next Dom will cherish walking those lines and find you worth every moment with no need for any feeling sorry. If they don't, well you aren't the right ones for each other, are you? Either way, the recognition is appreciated - thank you.
KaosAdy Posted November 4, 2021 Posted November 4, 2021 That is some ducking good writing and yeah it's a hard balance but the eb and sway make for that unknown but predictable scenarios that both Doms and subs like and crave.
Leisa Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 You’ve described every subs dream. I won’t settle and that’s probably why I’m still alone.
Ar**** Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 1 hour ago, Leisa said: You’ve described every subs dream. I won’t settle and that’s probably why I’m still alone. Nobody should have to settle. That you won't only highlights your sense of self-worth, and in turn your worth to the right kind of would-be suitor. That's pure gold, no two ways about it.
CopperKnob Posted November 5, 2021 Author Posted November 5, 2021 2 hours ago, Leisa said: You’ve described every subs dream. I won’t settle and that’s probably why I’m still alone. Snap
Potur78 Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 Good communication between Dom and sub is sort out all so you need to find someone have good communication skills, look like you don't have communication problem
Ar**** Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 Imagine it from a switch's perspective. We need to balance both dom and sub sides and then take care of the individual complexities. Sounds hard, doesn't it? But for some reason, it comes easily to me and I don't bother to trouble myself with the whys.
CopperKnob Posted November 5, 2021 Author Posted November 5, 2021 7 hours ago, Arcues said: Imagine it from a switch's perspective. We need to balance both dom and sub sides and then take care of the individual complexities. Sounds hard, doesn't it? But for some reason, it comes easily to me and I don't bother to trouble myself with the whys. *mind blown
Th**** Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 I will be totally honest Copper I find it easy to balance all of the contradictions of being a Dom. However the thought of giving a good blow job that would scare me, 🤣
CopperKnob Posted November 5, 2021 Author Posted November 5, 2021 13 minutes ago, Thebian said: I will be totally honest Copper I find it easy to balance all of the contradictions of being a Dom. However the thought of giving a good blow job that would scare me, 🤣 They aren't (that) bad 😏
Ar**** Posted November 5, 2021 Posted November 5, 2021 4 hours ago, CopperKnob said: *mind blown Thank god I didn't talk about having a switch partner. Kidding aside, you are who you are and you partner does need to get used to who you are just as you need to get used to who they are. Hopefully we all find someone who can do that.
Sassi-3310 Posted November 6, 2021 Posted November 6, 2021 I feel like you have described my Dom - he is the first Dom that I have entered into a 24/7 relationship with and (in my opinion) he’s every subs dream. I’m very lucky. This post has perfectly captured it for me and given me more crucial insight. Sometimes being sub we are showered with attention and it can be very sub-centric which I am always acutely aware of. I love to have balance and for me this comes from constant communication. We talk A LOT and this is key to a healthy relationship (in any dynamic). I think being Dom is a tough job, it’s not for the faint hearted and it’s not something one can dip in and out of necessarily. I take my hat off to anyone that can successfully provide for their sub as it is not an easy task!
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