ey**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I think I have some questions to try to understand things a little bit 1) Do you actually have a sub? Are you in discussions with someone as a sub? 2) Does this sub work? Is she paying her earnings into a household pot and you pay her an allowance from this? 3) OR are you expecting the sub to NOT work and be a stay-at-home sub who is given a budget in order to be to your expectations on how she should look? I'm not understanding where some of this is coming from is all.
na**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I certainly wasn’t judging or dictating. Just my own pov! 😘
na**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I think one’s finances are a very easy way of manipulating a *** person.
na**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Easy tigers 😂😂😂 I was just curious in terms of opinions, thank you ☺️
4R**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Absolutely not. If a sub is unable to look after themself and expects Dom to pay out for her then
4R**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 1 minute ago, SirArchA said: Absolutely not. If a sub is unable to look after themself and expects Dom to pay out for her then Damn phone posted before I'd finished. Then I wouldn't be interested in that sub. Sharing resources in an established relationship is different.
na**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 29 minutes ago, SirArchA said: Damn phone posted before I'd finished. Then I wouldn't be interested in that sub. Sharing resources in an established relationship is different. Well said 👍🏻
Mi**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Sorry some of these commenters threw their own upset at you instead of actually answering the question haha I think ask your sub to figure out basic costs then you have something to work with, more can be a reward but I don't think there should ever be deductions from the set number.
lo**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Look, all depends on how much your sub is worth, l personally like to have them looking there best, because at the end of the day you are going to get the best out of your sub, unless you are a wicked c***, then what’s the point, *** is power, power is ***, 🤐
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I suppose if you ‘required’ specific things of them, that cost them ***, I’d say that would be fair enough maybe? ‘I require you to wear X or provide Y’. However, this could be on the verge of coercive control (financial manipulation) on the part of the Dom or exploitation (I’m a daddy Dom and have had a lot of girls looking for a ‘sugar daddy’) on the part of the sub. Tricky. I’d generally steer clear of this I think. I’ve helped my little financially, but if I felt that it was ever transactional I’d be extremely uncomfortable. This is a minefield!!!
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 25 minutes ago, london768658 said: Look, all depends on how much your sub is worth, l personally like to have them looking there best, because at the end of the day you are going to get the best out of your sub, unless you are a wicked c***, then what’s the point, *** is power, power is ***, 🤐 Sorry, I dislike everything about this comment. How much your sub is worth...? They're not a car!
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I was offered for all of my clothes lingerie and shoes to be paid for this week. So I can look as he would prefer me too. If that's something I agreed with - what would you all say about that? I simply don't have the cash for loads of lingerie and fancy shoes. If he wants that and I want to please him. I'm giving it some thought.
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Just now, Dragonflylover said: I was offered for all of my clothes lingerie and shoes to be paid for this week. So I can look as he would prefer me too. If that's something I agreed with - what would you all say about that? I simply don't have the cash for loads of lingerie and fancy shoes. If he wants that and I want to please him. I'm giving it some thought. That's clothes shoes and lingerie I wear when I'm with him. That's all.
Cheekysub247 Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Everyone is different, as long as all agreed in their own relationship. Some people do live 1950s household so lets not judge. Some do like to spoil or to make earn, lets not judge. I personally wouldnt want to be provided ***, id like to earn my own *** which would contribute to the relationship, however im all for micromanagement and happy with someone i trust take control of it. I would just need a tiny bit put away as savings and for my son each month, the rest is controlled. Again only if the person im with wants that control, if not i will spend spend spend 😂
Su**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I think that getting them a credit card with £250 maximum on the card is the best way ! Also you can see what her spending habits are and review how much you should pay! Note if she is doing all your cleaning and cooking as well as serving you in the bedroom you should pay more then £100 pcm !👍
an**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I need to move across the pond, this would be considered sex trafficking in several of the states.. I’m not a D or whatever the female version of the term would be .. where do I sign up??
yo**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 Why do you have to pay if your satisfying your mistress/master bullshit
an**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I say this jokingly at the least. I’d never do it for it ***, so never a whore. I’d do it for free and hopefully work my life partner really..
lo**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 I’d rather drive a Jaguar 🐆, than a larda, think you have taken it the wrong way, by saying what any sub is worth is what they are worth to you, I personally look after all my subs.😈
ey**** Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 It's interesting that, I know there is a lot of backlash (which, as a side note - even if this is not the dynamic for you - this doesn't mean how someone else wants to do something is wrong) but you kinda do all know this was common place in vanilla relationships not really all that long ago, right? "Man of the House" would go out to work and his partner would stay at home and cook and clean and shop and raise the kids. That he would leave her an allowance to try to shop in budget for - and then obviously to get things she might need, or occasionally want ?! That if someone is giving someone a budget and dictating what they can spend it on ("you will look nice for me") this is still a form of control and Domination?! Hell - even in modern times - if both people are paying into a joint account or household budget there might still be controls on what can be spent for personal wants. I think... there's ways you can phrase it and it sounds terrible or ways you can phrase it and... it's common in some vanilla relationships.
CopperKnob Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 7 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said: It's interesting that, I know there is a lot of backlash (which, as a side note - even if this is not the dynamic for you - this doesn't mean how someone else wants to do something is wrong) but you kinda do all know this was common place in vanilla relationships not really all that long ago, right? "Man of the House" would go out to work and his partner would stay at home and cook and clean and shop and raise the kids. That he would leave her an allowance to try to shop in budget for - and then obviously to get things she might need, or occasionally want ?! That if someone is giving someone a budget and dictating what they can spend it on ("you will look nice for me") this is still a form of control and Domination?! Hell - even in modern times - if both people are paying into a joint account or household budget there might still be controls on what can be spent for personal wants. I think... there's ways you can phrase it and it sounds terrible or ways you can phrase it and... it's common in some vanilla relationships. As always it's the context that matters
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 2 hours ago, tenere said: True submission can not be bought. End of Am I being bought? Does that mean I am not a true sub?
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 18 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said: It's interesting that, I know there is a lot of backlash (which, as a side note - even if this is not the dynamic for you - this doesn't mean how someone else wants to do something is wrong) but you kinda do all know this was common place in vanilla relationships not really all that long ago, right? "Man of the House" would go out to work and his partner would stay at home and cook and clean and shop and raise the kids. That he would leave her an allowance to try to shop in budget for - and then obviously to get things she might need, or occasionally want ?! That if someone is giving someone a budget and dictating what they can spend it on ("you will look nice for me") this is still a form of control and Domination?! Hell - even in modern times - if both people are paying into a joint account or household budget there might still be controls on what can be spent for personal wants. I think... there's ways you can phrase it and it sounds terrible or ways you can phrase it and... it's common in some vanilla relationships. I'm seeing it as a form of control. I've seen doms here talk of choosing outfits for subs, of overseeing their diets, laying out their underwear for a play session. But because they pay for the lingerie they'd like to see on their sub - now it's a huge problem? Why?
Deleted Member Posted January 22, 2022 Posted January 22, 2022 2 hours ago, Dragonflylover said: I was offered for all of my clothes lingerie and shoes to be paid for this week. So I can look as he would prefer me too. If that's something I agreed with - what would you all say about that? I simply don't have the cash for loads of lingerie and fancy shoes. If he wants that and I want to please him. I'm giving it some thought. Like I said previously, I would consider these gifts and I see that differently. I'm not keen on a stipend, but that's just me. If both parties agree, it's none of my business, but one thing I wouldn't like is any sort of pressure tied the allowance previously mentioned. Limits pushed because "did you enjoy that manicure I paid for Wednesday?" Or even the idea that the *** has to be earned, through service etc. Service and submission to me is a gift, it's not something I expect to be paid for. Again, these are all hair my opinions and preferences.
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