What's your definition of CNC?

[Deleted Member]

I have always been a bit confused on the spectrum of CNC kink with women and how they define it.

- I think the idea the idea of playfully fighting and capturing is hot.

- I find women crying or screaming not hot, at all. 

So does my interest fall into CNC or is it too tame? What's the boundary line for what's called CNC?

[PeggableFucker]

CNC was called R**e Fantasy before the woke shitstorm.
Do with that what you will.

[Deleted Member]

Consensual /nonconsenual sex I was recently told

[ca****]

I don't think one person can define a kink or a fetish, we all have different standards and intensities to all we do. What works for you wouldn't work for others.
For me CNC is about the unknown (for the "bait"), she'll endure what she's given and try struggle and cry if she wants/can.
It's not a set script or set act. I've had ones that loved to fight and others that froze, some that cried and some that didn't. Do what feels right for you, and your bait and as long ad you set limits, boundaries and a safeword and give aftercare afterwards, you won't go too wrong.

[ey****]

CNC at it's simplest is consensual non-consent - so in essence things like safewords, limits, etc. are generally out of the window

this said.  if you are the Dominant in this situation you don't have to have anyone cry or scream or anything else.

there's also a lot of people who think it just comes down to r*pe play - and it might be that is someone's specific fantasy they wish to explore - but CNC and r*pe play are two different things.   The latter might still have other strict limits and potentially a safeword, the former probably would not.  

It is important to have an idea what someone wants out of the experience.   Whether this is also an ongoing thing (a lot of high protocol D/s relationships are by definition CNC) or a one-off.   Some want to use it as a way to push certain limits, others as a way to further the sense of giving up control.  

[ey****]

9 minutes ago, PeggableFucker said:

CNC was called R**e Fantasy before the woke shitstorm.
Do with that what you will.

no it wasn't. the two are quite different and variations of r**e fantasy are still called just that.

[Darren-wm]

It's all about trust male or female . Its an escape or how to confront past trauma with new controll . Use a safe have trust and lots of after care . You trust your partner to take you to your sexual limits & beyond ITS ALL ABOUT TRUST

[PolyGothRoss]

CNC and R*pe/Ravishment Play get confused a lot, which is why you need to talk through situations and scenarios first.

Technically, CNC is not R*pe Play. Consensual non-consensual is basically allowing your partner to do whatever they want to you without having to ask permission (within pre-agreed boundaries). You don’t get to say no. They don’t even have to ask you. They fancy a f**k? You’re bent over the table and their c**k’s inside you. Doesn’t matter what your doing or what you want, you’ve already agreed to be used when and how they want. That doesn’t mean anything goes, only what you’ve agreed too. Agreeing that they can do anything they want at home or around the garden doesn’t mean then can bend you over the bread basket in Tesco’s.

R*pe Play, on the other hand, is the roleplaying scenario where “you’re ***d to have sex”. You get to fight back, you may even get slapped around, if that’s the fantasy, you get to say no, you get to object, and there’s the difference.

Both are about control, and I’ve seen both terms used interchangeably, but they are two distinct and separate things, which is why you should always discuss things beforehand incase what you’re expecting isn’t what’s about to happen.

[PeggableFucker]

8 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

no it wasn't. the two are quite different and variations of r**e fantasy are still called just that.

Fair enough. I'm only basing this on what other people told me they meant by that term.
I have to admit... I took a 12 year break from the scene and it looks like I have to learn a whole new dictionary sometimes. 

[Deleted Member]

34 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

CNC at it's simplest is consensual non-consent - so in essence things like safewords, limits, etc. are generally out of the window

this said.  if you are the Dominant in this situation you don't have to have anyone cry or scream or anything else.

there's also a lot of people who think it just comes down to r*pe play - and it might be that is someone's specific fantasy they wish to explore - but CNC and r*pe play are two different things.   The latter might still have other strict limits and potentially a safeword, the former probably would not.  

It is important to have an idea what someone wants out of the experience.   Whether this is also an ongoing thing (a lot of high protocol D/s relationships are by definition CNC) or a one-off.   Some want to use it as a way to push certain limits, others as a way to further the sense of giving up control.  

Hmm, I think there is always a safeword. I'm not sure there is any scenario this doesn't apply(from a purely legal perspective lol).

I guess my issue is when women say they are into CNC I have a hard time really pinning down(lol) what they mean. Or if I write I have CNC as a kink what that is interpreted as since there is an extremely wide set of acts which fall under this umbrella. 

I always interpreted it as some variation of r*pe play but it sounds like that is not the case.

[ey****]

to be fair - I think - there are people who use them interchangeably which is why like everything communication is important.

Someone doing CNC with me... they're gonna get p**sed on and they're going to be eating my bum.   If they're lucky they might get some sex, but might just end up be cleaning up from whereever I ejaculate. 

[Ch****]

As with all definitions in kink, the meaning of any term will change with each person you ask; so always talk through things fully first.
.
That being said…
.
There are two types of play called CNC.
R*pe and “No limits / safe words”
While, obviously, lots of other play types (slavery etc) are CNC by default, they are not considered CNC when linked to a scene.
.
I never knew about the second meaning until becoming part of the community.

[pu****]

27 minutes ago, TheAngelThatBinds said:

CNC and R*pe/Ravishment Play get confused a lot, which is why you need to talk through situations and scenarios first.

Technically, CNC is not R*pe Play. Consensual non-consensual is basically allowing your partner to do whatever they want to you without having to ask permission (within pre-agreed boundaries). You don’t get to say no. They don’t even have to ask you. They fancy a f**k? You’re bent over the table and their c**k’s inside you. Doesn’t matter what your doing or what you want, you’ve already agreed to be used when and how they want. That doesn’t mean anything goes, only what you’ve agreed too. Agreeing that they can do anything they want at home or around the garden doesn’t mean then can bend you over the bread basket in Tesco’s.

R*pe Play, on the other hand, is the roleplaying scenario where “you’re ***d to have sex”. You get to fight back, you may even get slapped around, if that’s the fantasy, you get to say no, you get to object, and there’s the difference.

Both are about control, and I’ve seen both terms used interchangeably, but they are two distinct and separate things, which is why you should always discuss things beforehand incase what you’re expecting isn’t what’s about to happen.

I really enjoyed reading that I always thought cnc was more or less consensual r*pe but I can definitely see the difference now. I wish this app could give awards and things like that

[ey****]

2 minutes ago, Mathbro said:

Hmm, I think there is always a safeword. I'm not sure there is any scenario this doesn't apply(from a purely legal perspective lol).

 

this is why it's important to have a lot of trust.   A lack of a safeword doesn't mean you cannot say, "I've twisted my ankle and it really hurts can we stop for a minute" nor does it mean you cannot say "I've got cramp can you untie me?" just, y'know - on paper it's then up to the other person what they do about that.

Before agreeing to CNC you also have to be sure in yourself you wouldn't take things too far. 

[Ch****]

12 minutes ago, Mathbro said:

Hmm, I think there is always a safeword. I'm not sure there is any scenario this doesn't apply(from a purely legal perspective lol).

I guess my issue is when women say they are into CNC I have a hard time really pinning down(lol) what they mean. Or if I write I have CNC as a kink what that is interpreted as since there is an extremely wide set of acts which fall under this umbrella. 

I always interpreted it as some variation of r*pe play but it sounds like that is not the case.

From a legal perspective is country specific. But in the UK pretty much everything is illegal by default, irrespective of the persons wishes or desires. So be careful and only play with people you trust.

[Ch****]

CNC doesn't mean no safeword, it means when the s-type does not want something to happen but is ok for it to happen anyway.

[Ja****]

There is only one thing to remember about CNC. The intercourse is consensual while everything else is NOT. That’s it’s.

[Ch****]

8 minutes ago, PuppetMasterC said:

CNC doesn't mean no safeword, it means when the s-type does not want something to happen but is ok for it to happen anyway.

For some s types the entire purpose of CNC is no safe word. That’s the only reason they are doing it.
For others it’s r*pe fantasy, which could easily include safe words.

[Ch****]

Each person is different.

[Ja****]

Of course every situation is different as are the needs/desires of individuals but let’s be clear here. CNC is nothing like r*pe play or role play. The people I do this with can not be satisfied unless all control is lost and they are blind to all variables. It’s serious business that takes intense planning and dedication to another’s needs.

[Ch****]

For me cnc is giving total control to someone, no safeword, but pre agreed hard limits in place, those for me will never be involved in anything.
R**e play is nothing i want to be involved in purely because i dont role play anything.

[ol****]

Computer Numeric Control?

[li****]

Consensual non consent for an example with me is, I like sleep play. So before hand give i consent to someone for something that wouldn't be consider consensual ( like touching me sexually while I'm alseep I cannot consent but because I dod before hand it's okay) so it seems non consensual but it is same with ***ing and ***play.

[Ja****]

1 hour ago, Cheekysub247 said:

For me cnc is giving total control to someone, no safeword, but pre agreed hard limits in place, those for me will never be involved in anything.
R**e play is nothing i want to be involved in purely because i dont role play anything.

That is my opinion, too, of our entire deal here. Role play, while potentially fun, returns you back to where you were when it’s finished. Real play reaches down deep into our very sexuality and spurs growth and satiation.

[Ch****]

@JamesInConroe yer role play in any form just isnt me, im not an actress and i need everything to be just real everyday life(albeit a different life to the norm lol),  and mostly non sexual for me personally x