adeadmanshand Posted December 28, 2022 Posted December 28, 2022 I don't even know if I intend to stay on at this site, this is literally throwing something out into the universe and seeing what it gives back At this moment I am only indulging my curiosity and looking to do this in a safe and healthy way. I have always found myself attracted to being "submissive" but have never acted upon this. I just got out of a disastrous and toxic relationship that has got me in a horrible way as it relates to my self-worth... There was damage done here and as a result this has me moving on anything new... Slowly... Very slowly. During this relationship I did open up to her my.... Curiosities... and this information was used against me. I was made to feel... Lesser as a man. Make no mistake, that aspect of things was NOT the primary reason of the failure of the relationship.... So many OTHER things to speak of to that end, but it speaks to the toxic nature I'm coming from, that a person that I opened up to and shared such intimate details with later betrayed and used that against me. Abusive In ways I definitely did not want. Still, the curiosity remains, but my willingness to be open about it is compromised. It's going to take me a while to even regain my ability to connect with someone on a "normal" level and meet someone, probably even longer past that to open up all the way to reveal these interests. So what do you do? You "research". You look around which is hard... No I'm not plunking money down on ANY site... And this site comes up as fairly "legit" so... Ok let's just see. Seriously if there was anyone "Local" that I would meet via here it would be something like meeting at a Starbucks to get to know each other as a person. (ladies I'm just as worried about my safety here as you would ever be... Public location, easy ways to "escape" LOL) it may even take a few of these meetings before I move any further. Otherwise, I'm just leaning into the knowledge of the community... There has to be some people who can at least be empathetic, and if this is not the kind of place where that happens, point me another way.