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I've always had a soft spot for true brats. I've mentored them, trained them even owned one, but most of all I have the ultimate respect for them. So if you are a true brat you'll find this enlightening. But I urge you not to let me get into your head because you'll end up becoming hooked on me.

There are several guides out there relating to the ownership of brats written by brats for brats. It’s time to redress the balance a bit. To this end I have put together this guide to help those who are considering taking on the challenge of brat ownership.


1. Patience – Saintly levels of patience are an absolute must. Your brat will exasperate you beyond belief to the point where outsiders may wonder if there is any control at all. This is especially true in the early stages of ownership.

2. *** – The legal headache soothing variety. *** pressure pills. The urge to bang your head against the wall at regular intervals will happen. Ketamine and other tranquilizers, while tempting to calm your brat down, are not recommended and will lead to complications.

3. Sense of Humour – Realise that everything your brat will try is not meant to hurt you or disrespect you but to be fun and make you smile. Assuredly at the precise moment, it may not make you smile and hence the requirement of 1 and 2 above but looking back the humour should be apparent. Mismatch in sense of humour is the cause of most brat owner breakups.

4. Imagination – Without it, you are going to struggle to find ways of getting your own back. Brats are generally ultra bright and devious creatures and you’ll have to at least match them in ingenuity for pun/funishments. You will also need your imagination to pre-empt their antics. Paranoia is a definite hazard of ownership.

5. Thick skin – It is going to hurt. Brats cannot help themselves. If they find a crop/flogger/paddle or any other toy in their hands they are going to have a practice swat under the heading “..but Master/Sir has to try all his toys on himself first. It’s in the Brat Constitution.” Let them get away with it at your own peril or devise ways that such things never arrive in their hands. For example: “Fetch my crop while on your hands and knees carrying the crop in your mouth.” Specific language is important. More on that later.

Common Brat Tactics

1. Incitement – They know they shouldn’t do it but they do. “Is that the best you got?”; “Good boy”; “Thank you my all-knowing fluffy bunnykins”. You can insert your own “pet” name in here but it will be designed by the brat to be mildly insulting while funny at the same time. “Master/Sir is always right.” Seems to be a common phrase when they agree with something about you that is not quite complimentary. “I’m an idiot” … When you forgot something … “You are an idiot, yes Master/Sir. Your pet will remember that.” They can keep up the reminders for a considerable period of time.

2. Pranks – Toys will go missing or shoe laces tied together while you snooze in a chair. You think that’s massage oil, but no it’s blue food colouring. Your brat is only looking for ways to keep you on your toes and inject some fun into your life. Bear this in mind when you find yourself reaching for the *** pressure pills and the studded paddle.

3. Coy silence – Be afraid, be very afraid. Your brat is plotting or has already got something set up and is waiting for you to walk right into it. As they do in jungle warfare when something is tied high in a tree, stop dead in your tracks and check the ground. The coy silence is a distraction from the main event.

4. Innocent puppy eyes – Has anyone seen those vampire programs where the innocent puppy suddenly sprouts fangs and mutilates the hand patting them on the head? You have been warned. “It wasn’t me.” …uh huh …sure. Sugar cuts itself with Ex-Lax does it?

5. Loopholes – When the urge is upon them they will try to find loopholes to wriggle through. This is a talent I have found most brats to be highly accomplished at.

“Make me a coffee” might result in the coffee being made but not delivered.

Literal loopholes are commonly exploited:
“Behave” … “I am… I am behaving badly.”
“Be good” … “I am being good at being bad.”

Any time your brat starts a sentence “You said….” You can be pretty sure a loophole has been found. Their excuse is that they are promoting clearer communication of your wishes. Sometimes owning a brat can feel like you are a high court judge taking extreme care over your use of language.

Your Response

1. Nuclear – Sometimes you are so furious you want to beat the crap out of them. Stop. Think. Are you furious with them or at yourself for falling for it? Was there any real harm done?

2. Funishment – Mostly what they want is a good spanking. If you see the humour in their antics then a funishment is recommended. Some may say you are rewarding their bad behaviour. I say you are rewarding them for expressing themselves and being true to their nature.

Spanking: Never met a brat that didn’t like it.

Orgasm counting: *** them and have them count each one. Failure to count or miss counting, start at 1.

Favourite play: That might be a rope session or flogging or something else that you both really enjoy together.

3. Punishment – Sometimes they go too far. Sometimes they really do need a punishment. Make sure your brat understands why they are being punished and set the parameters. The parameters may be a time limit or a count. My most effective are: “You have disappointed me.” – Delivered dead pan. Your brat will cut themselves up for days over that one while trying to be as pleasing as possible. Only to be used when they truly have been a disappointment. Over use will render it ineffective.

Timeout – Kneel them in a corner facing the wall and have them be silent for a period of time. If the move put them back in place without a word and reset the clock. This is about denial of time with you.

Orgasm denial – Keep bringing them to the edge and stopping. The frustration in your brat should match the level of frustration they caused by their action. This is a tricky one to judge and you will need to know your brat well.

Reason – Give your brat a really good reason why they should cease and desist from a particular activity. Dominants have history as well and some behaviour steps on triggers that are not good places for you to be. As you respect the limits of your brat I would hope they would respect yours. Sharing history can be hard and ***ful but the alternative of allowing your brat to continue is worse. Trust me on that one.

4. “The look” – Practice in a mirror that look that says “Steady girl.” It might be a raised eyebrow with a slight tilt of the head. You’ll now it when you get it right. Your brat will respond appropriately and be back under control again. This is generally my first line of defense.

5. Stop – Simply that. Stop. Nothing will focus their minds more than when you stop whatever activity you are doing or go quiet and sit back arms folded. When combined with “the look” you have an effective limiter on your brats behaviour.

6. Finger Snap – I like my girls trained to the click of my fingers. When I snap my fingers it is because I need something so their attention is mine. They cease whatever they are doing and focus. It may take some time before this is an automatic reaction. Use it initially when you do want something and the brat can prove they are useful. Nothing makes a brat happier than making you happy by doing something for you. Soon the snap of your fingers will be very effective for attention grabbing.

7. Personal – There will be something that your brat really does not like. Something that can be done quickly and effectively. Tickling is a good one if your brat pleads for you to stop. Do not. I repeat, do not allow your brat to claim that the activity is now a “hard limit”. The precedent will be set for all punishments hitting the “hard limit” list.

Why Bother with a Brat?

The effort they put into the fun and games is matched by their devotion and deep desire to make you happy. A properly trained brat knows when it is and is not appropriate to be brattish. When pressed to be on their best behaviour and given a good reason, a properly trained brat will not let you down.

There is a difference between a brat and a badly behaved sub/slave. A brat when they act up will make those around at first take a step back and worry about sanity and then smile because there is humour in the action. A brat will only direct their brattishness at their owner or to very close friends who know what they are like. A badly behaved sub/slave will do it without humour and will be disrespectful to anyone and everyone making those around frown and become uneasy. Brats do not act up for punishment. They act up for funishment.

Final Thoughts

I believe brats can be trained/tamed within reason. I think they find a comfort level on what is and is not acceptable and test the boundary. It is up to us, their owners, to set those boundaries and stick to them. With understanding of what your brat does, why and when, you will gain valuable insight into how their mind works and how to keep your brat in perfectly happy health. I believe it is a crime to knock all brattish behaviour out of your charge. It is a denial of who they are. Personally I don’t want a doormat. I like a challenge.

Thank you for this. VERY informative and appreciated

Absolutely fascinating reading.  I would love to be a brat it sounds such fun.  I have a new dom so might try it out!



Always good to remember that kink is fun. I like a bit of brattiness in a playmate - much better than someone who appears to have no personality at all.

  • 2 weeks later...

I recognise some of these traits. :) I love the comprehensive, helpful post. I think it's good to remember the fun and joy in kink and a bit of bratty play seems perfect for that.


I have been very noughty Miss, please punish me   

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