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Please help, was i a terrible person and wrong to block them?

Li****

By Li****
in Kink Academy

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Po****

Po****

Posted
Sorry to hear that this happened to you unfortunately this app or website is riddled with fake people that are really looking for an easy hookup I'm sorry that you're not taking advantage of but you should only have agreed to something if it's right by you now obviously you said you're shy and I get that I have been in the past my best advice is is anybody who who tried to take control of you in the first few days without getting to know you is a big red flag you've got to treat it like a relationship you should only allow certain things or rules if you have gotten to know the person and you trust them so if somebody is telling you you can't do something right off the bat before you've gotten to know them then that's a no
Im****

Im****

Posted
Consent is HUGE, no real dom would just start giving orders right away. Also he sounds like a controlling gaslighter, definitely block him and move on.
ki****

ki****

Posted
I agree with so much that has already been said here. His a fake and an ***r. No one has the right to tell you what to do. Consent and trust is everything in this community. Block him and move on.
Never ever do anything you're not happy and comfortable with.
Th****

Th****

Posted
Knock if off as a bad experience, clearly fake. Mutual respect, should always be above and beyond when forming a relationship, the problem is many potential subs are turned on by danger, it can be alluring. Stay safe make sure others earn your trust, and be a perv your way.
yo****

yo****

Posted
You did nothing wrong, that level of commitment from any type of relationship should be major red flags.
QXX666

QXX666

Posted

Good to know you block them. Should have report them too as they are dangerous. 

Da****

Da****

Posted
I don't need to read past the first 2 lines ( will go read it after this comment)

You are never in the wrong to block someone, it don't matter if they was in the wrong or you. Blocking someone is your right to pick and choose who you talk with and to what degree you talk.

It don't matter why you did it in my eyes as you felt it was the right thing to do at the time, yes you may feel like you wish to talk in the future but that's 100% your choice.

I'll go read the rest now and maybe add some more here if I feel it's needed but I will still stand by the choice you made to block them as you seen fit to do so at the time
Da****

Da****

Posted
9 minutes ago, dragonsdesire said:
I don't need to read past the first 2 lines ( will go read it after this comment)

You are never in the wrong to block someone, it don't matter if they was in the wrong or you. Blocking someone is your right to pick and choose who you talk with and to what degree you talk.

It don't matter why you did it in my eyes as you felt it was the right thing to do at the time, yes you may feel like you wish to talk in the future but that's 100% your choice.

I'll go read the rest now and maybe add some more here if I feel it's needed but I will still stand by the choice you made to block them as you seen fit to do so at the time

Add on

Your 110% definitely not in the wrong. He is in fact coming across as a very insecure fake Dom..

There was zero respect for you in there from what your said and he has a verry me me me attitude.

People like him sacre genuine people away from trying out what they genuinely like and make it all about them and what they want. Them type of people can be very dangerous and narcissistic.

Your dodged a huge bullet there in my opinion. Only wonder how he treats his "other" sub.

A true Dom&Sub relationship the sub has all 90% the control.. they should be setting the limits and pace of things.
Yes the Dom's is "charge" but that's only because the sub has left them have the power and they can easily take it away.

ri****

ri****

Posted
Nope. Anyone who tells you to do something instead of asking and agreeing to things is a block.
Vo****

Vo****

Posted

Not read all the replies but this guy is high level yikes. Never forget that abusive people often gravitate towards the kink world to trawl for new victims & they will always focus on people who are upfront about being shy, nervous, or newbies etc.

I have a solid rule which is to back away from anyone who tries to tell me what to do before I’ve chosen them as my partner.

There’s a big difference between flirty discussion of dynamics you’d like to explore, and some random d**khead saying you’re no longer allowed to do x y z just because you’ve messaged them for a bit. Um I don’t belong to you until I say so ok??

I’m submissive AF but not until I’ve chosen a person. If I decide I’ve really clicked with someone over messages & am going to meet them, I will stop chatting to others until I’ve met that person and decided if we click in real life…… which I try to do asap. If the other people take offence, that’s ok. Dating is a bit savage & that cannot be helped.

Lastly, always remind yourself that submission is a GIFT that you give to someone worthy. It is valuable and beautiful. Anyone who comes in and tries to grab it without permission should be invited to get themselves straight in the f**kin sea. Xx

Deleted Member

Posted
Not the best of experience to start 😔 but very glad to see you did post on here and from all the comments, it echoes red flags over and over. There will be those who will take advantage of a newbies. You did what felt right and comfortable for YOU, nothing to feel guilty of.
J-****

J-****

Posted
You’ve never even met the dude so he has no right to demand anything. I won’t let my women talk to other men, but that’s after I’ve actually made them cum 😂
Mr****

Mr****

Posted
I agree with all of the above. First of all, and really last of all, you always have the right to say no and withdraw from a relationship. No means no in my book. That little voice in your head was right and I’m glad you listened to it. I’m a dom and willing to answer any questions you may have with no expectations
John54

John54

Posted
This Dom doesn't seem to have a sense that, until the negotiating stage is concluded, bullying and abusing you is just that. I've read that in the end it's the Sub that has the final say (ultimately and if necessary by using the safe word). You don't mention that this Dom even raised the issue. I'm a Dom, but I wouldn't want to be this one's partner.
Ma****

Ma****

Posted
Definitely do not apologise, Dom and sub relationships requires respect if he can't be bothered to give you any don't even bother spending your time thinking about him
Th****

Th****

Posted
Only 10 messages then He wouldn't communicate but didn't want you to talk to anyone else?
Make a hard pass on that one, you owe them nothing.
Calling you untrustworthy without knowing you.
Not all couples are the same, i can be away for 4 - 6 weeks at a time with work.. he deserves some one that is like minded hence we are here.
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