Fisting tips

[Chloebear]

On 4/21/2023 at 7:39 PM, UK_Knight said:

Special lube has been mentioned a couple of times, can someone let me know what is special about it please?

You’ll find it under sections for lube for fisting online…. It’s to do with the thickness, it tends to be a bit thicker - although many I’ve heard prefer silky lube or something much more runny. Also, it can have slight numbing properties, which makes it a bit easier, although I haven’t noticed a huge numbing sensation personally. I think it’s probably a case of having a range and finding what suits best, since everyone will like a different sensation. 

[TR0S3PH1N3]

My advice , Which sounds trivial would be watching random porn. Can seem like showmanship at times , I've learned from technique even gently alternating hands on/off as the muscles tighten and loosen , build up is important .
Try cleaning the bottom of a pint glass lol , you have to work your hands in and almost maneuver them into position, if you are going for a closed fist .
Try different positions , some can be easier going in but not out !
Dont have your legs widen too much whilst you are in or the hips literally can clamp the wrist.
trying to unfold a hand thats stuck can be interesting ...

Also avoid harsh chemicals on the hands especially in the day previous .
Monitor aftercare . listen to your body.

[ge****]

4 hours ago, TR0S3PH said:

My advice , Which sounds trivial would be watching random porn. Can seem like showmanship at times , I've learned from technique even gently alternating hands on/off as the muscles tighten and loosen , build up is important .
Try cleaning the bottom of a pint glass lol , you have to work your hands in and almost maneuver them into position, if you are going for a closed fist .
Try different positions , some can be easier going in but not out !
Dont have your legs widen too much whilst you are in or the hips literally can clamp the wrist.
trying to unfold a hand thats stuck can be interesting ...

Also avoid harsh chemicals on the hands especially in the day previous .
Monitor aftercare . listen to your body.

I'd disagree re porn - most of the fisting porn I've seen has been quite brutal and all guns blazing rather than a slow build up to it.

[TR0S3PH1N3]

4 hours ago, gemini_man said:

I'd disagree re porn - most of the fisting porn I've seen has been quite brutal and all guns blazing rather than a slow build up to it.

Try searching tantric instead of brutal fisting

[ka****]

Start slow with oil 🫣

[PebblePebble]

5 hours ago, gemini_man said:

I'd disagree re porn - most of the fisting porn I've seen has been quite brutal and all guns blazing rather than a slow build up to it.

yuvutu has some more sensual fisting content

[au****]

Can’t gay people have anything?

[theCobbler77]

2 hours ago, aurorascare said:

Can’t gay people have anything?

????

[Ta****]

4 hours ago, aurorascare said:

Can’t gay people have anything?

I also don't understand this comment?

[PebblePebble]

4 hours ago, aurorascare said:

Can’t gay people have anything?

i believe they are (jokingly??) saying that fisting was and/or should still be?? an activity exclusively  for gays? in substitution for penis fucking, because gays have always fisted and fisted first???

[Jimmmy]

Oh dear. Yet again, too much inaccurate, and wrong advice, sadly. I’ve been doing this for over 30 years and therefore consider myself to be reasonably experienced. I’ll keep this pretty brief, but feel free to message me privately if you want further detailed comprehensive information!

There’s a lot of good information on this thread about this, but not all of it is good. As always, there will be many people with a little knowledge who think they know a lot.

The same thing that comes up on every such discussion is “stretching“. Stretching in any way at any time, for any reason, is physiologically definitely not good. Stretching causes tissue damage, internal bleeding, nerve damage, scarring, and permanent slackening-off of muscle, which you certainly don’t want “down there“! Women who have been badly stretched during childbirth are permanently changed.

If you take nothing else away from this entire thread, take this away: It’s absolutely NOT about stretching. It’s about relaxation. The latter infers that you need to be comfortable, in the right environment, with the right person, having done the correct preparation, and most importantly, being in tune with and knowing your own body. So without wanting to put too fine a point on it, if you can’t already take a toy that is a bit bigger than the fist that you want to take, you shouldn’t even attempt it.

The biggest barrier to this kind of play is mental, not physical. Achieving total relaxation requires you to be in the right place in your head. Otherwise it simply is not going to happen without physical damage.

Playing by yourself, you are in control, and you can get to a point where you feel comfortable with a certain toy, then you can take it a stage further and involve somebody else. Proper relaxation comes from having the mental knowledge that you’ve done something almost this big before and you’re only going very slightly bigger this time. Small incremental steps lead to confidence and subsequent total relaxation.

I have fisted a woman who had never experienced it before and I certainly consider that having also previously experienced having been the fistee myself, it brings a lot of empathy, understanding and consequent care in the conduct of such play when you are the fister.

For me of course, it’s anal, not vaginal, but the same considerations apply. I can take some huge toys and I can take a fist or even two very easily, but I’m also still very tight and I don’t need a nappy. That’s because I’m relaxed, not stretched. Because I’m confident in the knowledge that I can take something of a certain size, there isn’t a mental block and understandable apprehension about having something huge pushed inside me: I know that I’ve done it easily before.

 

[PebblePebble]

to an extent i agree with Jimmmy with regards to relaxation being key.

''The biggest barrier to this kind of play is mental, not physical. Achieving total relaxation requires you to be in the right place in your head.'' 

is imo very accurate

however i feel he went a bit off track with anal,  given the OP specifically says vaginal in her opening post. 

i don't think  a vagina can be ''trained''

as said in a previous comment, for myself, a vagina owner with 25 years fisting experience,

sometimes the tiniest hand isn't   going anywhere, other times 2 is awesome

i don't need a nappy either

[Ta****]

I'll be taking all advice into consideration! I really appreciate everyone's responses and candor! I've been taking it all in and taking notes. I also know I may never actually be able to take a fist so I'm prepared for that outcome too. You guys are lovely 😊

[Jimmmy]

13 minutes ago, PebblePebble said:

to an extent i agree with Jimmmy with regards to relaxation being key.

''The biggest barrier to this kind of play is mental, not physical. Achieving total relaxation requires you to be in the right place in your head.'' 

is imo very accurate

however i feel he went a bit off track with anal,  given the OP specifically says vaginal in her opening post. 

i don't think  a vagina can be ''trained''

as said in a previous comment, for myself, a vagina owner with 25 years fisting experience,

sometimes the tiniest hand isn't   going anywhere, other times 2 is awesome

i don't need a nappy either

Thanks @PebblePebble. Not being the owner of a vagina, I’m evidently not as in tune with the needs of such an orifice, compared to a rectum!

However, I do consider that my comment about not stretching is the most important thing. I had a long discussion with a surgeon about this and they confirmed that it’s stretching that really does the damage. This is one reason why they prefer to cut a woman’s birth canal during childbirth rather than have her tear.

When you say that you don’t think that a vagina can be “trained“, is it any different with a rectum? Can that be “trained“? And what is “training“ in that context, anyway? I certainly know that I “trained“ my former partner’s vagina, in that we achieved ever larger and larger penetrations, over a period of time. But she was definitely not “stretched”. She learned to relax, more and more.

As a free diver, I know that to get ever deeper on one breath of air, you use “incremental progression“, where you are doing the same as you did last time, and then just a little bit more. It’s all to do with managing the mental aspect of things, much more than the physical. This is exactly how I got to the stage where I am at now. But I also know for sure that I am not stretched. I am not loose and my rectum certainly doesn’t need a nappy. I’m glad to hear that your vagina doesn’t need one either! Happy days! 🤪

[Fa****]

1 hour ago, Jimmmy said:

Thanks @PebblePebble. Not being the owner of a vagina, I’m evidently not as in tune with the needs of such an orifice, compared to a rectum!

However, I do consider that my comment about not stretching is the most important thing. I had a long discussion with a surgeon about this and they confirmed that it’s stretching that really does the damage. This is one reason why they prefer to cut a woman’s birth canal during childbirth rather than have her tear.

When you say that you don’t think that a vagina can be “trained“, is it any different with a rectum? Can that be “trained“? And what is “training“ in that context, anyway? I certainly know that I “trained“ my former partner’s vagina, in that we achieved ever larger and larger penetrations, over a period of time. But she was definitely not “stretched”. She learned to relax, more and more.

As a free diver, I know that to get ever deeper on one breath of air, you use “incremental progression“, where you are doing the same as you did last time, and then just a little bit more. It’s all to do with managing the mental aspect of things, much more than the physical. This is exactly how I got to the stage where I am at now. But I also know for sure that I am not stretched. I am not loose and my rectum certainly doesn’t need a nappy. I’m glad to hear that your vagina doesn’t need one either! Happy days! 🤪

I’m not sure where you’re from but in the UK we’d rather someone tore (2nd degree) when delivering than perform an episiotomy. Obviously an episiotomy is preferred over a 3rd or 4th degree tear but episiotomies are (as a rule) only performed in emergency situations or for an instrumental delivery. 

[PebblePebble]

1 hour ago, Jimmmy said:

I certainly know that I “trained“ my former partner’s vagina, in that we achieved ever larger and larger penetrations, over a period of time. But she was definitely not “stretched”. She learned to relax, more and more.

imo as said before and also said by yourself, it was not her vagina you ''trained'' it was her brain

 

[Th****]

I love vaginal fisting, I do it as often as possible. I was playing with someone who had never done it before, so she didn't have any idea what was going to happen. I was going as slow as I possibly could for that very reason. All of a sudden she let out this intense scream grabbed my arm and ***d my hand as deep as she could. DO NOT do that to your partner, it caused some minor tearing of her vagina, and I felt like shit. I had never had anyone else do that before her so it startled me (yes I'm being honest here), if I had been more prepared I might have been able to stop it before that happened.