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Can I completely change myself from a sub to a Dom?


dj****

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Posted
For me, I'm a submissive and have a deep desire to only submit. I can never dominate someone, nor will I ever want to. It's not who I am. It's something that is deep inside of me that I need. For some, roles are just for show and play. Others it can mean something very different. Not show and play for me. I need to submit and serve my Dominant.
Posted
I was a switch for a little bit or for a couple of experiences. I'd say people are generally set close to where they are but some changes can happen especially as you mature. Don't be ashamed of who you are unless you are a degradee. Then you should cry in the shower like a little bitch. 🤣
Posted
Yes. It happens. I changed my whole orientation lol.
Posted
I'm a switch, there's activities I enjoy like being ***d. I can order my sub to do them and I get it all on domness mode. But it's possible I'll meet someone who I respect and view in a way that makes me feel like rip toeing and being more back seat. For now I'm the driver. Sex is different with different people. Two weeks ago there was 2 things I was kind of closed off to. Then I met someone who shyly said I like to dress up. Alone I thought of him in a skirt getting bound and now I have to have it. Someone else it may not be for me. But I love him being my housewife. New organic language and views emerged and it's amazing to see what can evolve when ur open minded, considerate, and compromising. We're here to grow. If ur fixed u either really know urself already or you're in the wrong place. Imo
Posted
Of course you can. You may be naturally a submissive person, or naturally a dominant person. It’s your mind set. In bdsm a dom or sub enjoys their side of the power exchange. If you’d rather take the responsibility of “dom’ing” a sub. Do your research. Remember things doms did with you that were good traits. I’ve seen other comments saying they’re a switch. This is also a great way to test the waters so to speak. May I suggest possibly finding a playmate who would be willing to let you experiment? An experienced switch willing to Lyell you figure things out might be the ticket. At the end of the day, don’t rush or *** things. It should feel natural for the most part. It takes time. So doing your research is key. Speak with experienced doms willing to help/teach/share. For the most part we’re part of a great community willing to help one another live our best lives. Best of luck I. Your journey!
Posted
If that's who you are becoming or who you want to be then I say embrace it
Posted
Yes you can. It’s almost like being a switch but you don’t just have a night of different play It’s obviously more long term but you do you besides you might want to go back to being a sub at some point.
Posted
Can be a switch. You can be both one for a little while and then switch it up and take over
Posted
Well with me I'm slightly submissive to the mam but dominant to the woman and at the same time if he is a submissive man I'm the dominant woman
Posted
Nobody makes any decisions for you in this world BUT YOU.
Posted
Don’t ask if you can, just do it. There’s no harm in trying. I’m definitely versatile 💯. I went from being a dom out of comfort due to trauma where I wasn’t comfortable in anything remotely submissive but I waited until I was with someone I was comfortable with to explore and did exactly that. I love being bound, gagged, fucked and given directives. I had no idea. If you try it and don’t like it- than you know. Just try it!
Posted
On 12/21/2023 at 10:10 PM, StardustEnergy said:

I’m dominant but have been submissive with the right partner … I think context is key 🔑

This⬆️

To my experience, it completely depends from the dynamic between and your partner.

Also, the boundary between sub/Dom is not a finely demarcated line. With a bit of imagination and experimentation it will become fluid.

I think the label sub/Dom has more to do with self identification than the objective role you are playing in a scene, especially if there is a deep connection with your partner. (which for me is necessary)

I can imagine a lot of people won't agree though...

Posted
Well yes. I believe the best way to learn to be a Dom is to start as a sub. But give thought to this idea, in boxing it's 10x harder to unlearn bad technique than it is to learn. Especially dominate over another, in a position of power. Your during the submissive needs 1st not your own. I'm dominate 24/7 in real life and just naturally so submissive is a break from reality in a way that and I was a live in slave to a house of dommes from 16 till my earlier 20s dating one of them.

You can be a sub a switch a dome you can be anything ya wanna be as long as it's done right. Ya should explore all roles it's healthy
Posted
18 hours ago, sudbury54506 said:
Don’t ask if you can, just do it. There’s no harm in trying. I’m definitely versatile 💯. I went from being a dom out of comfort due to trauma where I wasn’t comfortable in anything remotely submissive but I waited until I was with someone I was comfortable with to explore and did exactly that. I love being bound, gagged, fucked and given directives. I had no idea. If you try it and don’t like it- than you know. Just try it!

Well there actually is harm mental physical. It's a serious art and craft that well somes talent but most is learned from experience. Everyone leans one way or another but like someone doesn't just become a great leader or Captain or boss etc they're either taught or make a lot of mistakes and fail over along time. Or better way to put it you live to eat well ya wanna switch toncooking with no training sure ya can make cereal but can ya magically make cuque de von or maybe cross contaminate and hurt someone. I'm just leaning on the opposite extreme voicing devils advocate. For anyone who may read it it's helpful thought

Posted
Ahh shit lots of ppl said what I did I didn't realize there were 40 plus comments A+ community members
Posted
December 29, 2023, mrfoxxxe said:

Well there actually is harm mental physical. It's a serious art and craft that well somes talent but most is learned from experience. Everyone leans one way or another but like someone doesn't just become a great leader or Captain or boss etc they're either taught or make a lot of mistakes and fail over along time. Or better way to put it you live to eat well ya wanna switch toncooking with no training sure ya can make cereal but can ya magically make cuque de von or maybe cross contaminate and hurt someone. I'm just leaning on the opposite extreme voicing devils advocate. For anyone who may read it it's helpful thought

You bring up strong points! I didn’t take into consideration the style of relationship with whom ever they’re interacting with. For myself personally, I love dialoguing and getting to know someone well enough prior to engaging in any sort of sexual encounter. Sometimes even months dialoguing boundaries, wants/hopes and expectations. Nothing can be properly done without clear communication. My comment was mostly meant for in a scenario that’s already sexually comfortable and wanting to explore a role reversal style. I blame my neurodivergent tendencies to skim read some of the replies before replying.

Posted
You're probably going to run across a lot of people with toxic dom syndrome telling you that's not how it works. Don't let them gatekeep ya. They're just threatened by the concept because it encroaches on what they think is innately special about them. The answer is simple: If you have the desire, it will go far.
Posted
For me I'm both. With my significant other I can be submissive. Especially if we are enjoying another female she runs it, but with other females im dom.
earthyangel
Posted

you are not stuck. it might be that you are a switch. you can accept that and enjoy what ever you choose to be. just don't confuse the people. you can be a Dom if that tickles you. 

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