Limits and boundaries

[Deleted Member]

Have your boindaries and limits changed over time? When I first started 28 years ago the list was as long as my arm. But now some remain but many are now appropriate or moved to soft limits. I would love to know if this is the same for others and maybe examples

[ge****]

There are certainly things that were once hard limits that are no longer so after I've got a better understanding of them having discussed with others.
.
There are also some things that will *always* be limits no matter how much someone explains them to me.

[Deleted Member]

It all depends on the partner you are with. The trust you have in someone determines how far you are willing to go.

[Deleted Member]

However, a hard no should remain a hard no if the trust isn't there.

[CopperKnob]

I think as you grow, your perspective will change. That's true of everything, not just kink.
I also agree with lilone, it'll change depending on the relationship you're in

[Da****]

Love the points raised but I can also see this from the other side. Sometimes it can be hard to trust a (play) partners' perception of their own boundaries and limits.
Like when they say yes, enthusiastically, safely in an informed, genuineltly consensual and reversible way and yet you know theres a part of them pushing their own limits just that bit too far. Maybe because of the dynamic you have or because maybe they know I want something too but am not quite ready to ask or show it. I've had in the past a nervous sense of imbalance at these crossroads. Like something unheathy and dark lurking in the corner of the room. And it's not always other peoppes boundaries that cause it too. With a clear mind my boundary can sometimes be carefully moved or put aside, only to find it creeping up on me unannounced.

It leaves me uneasy and nearly always results in something going wrong. I've learned to notice and give it shape when it comes.

But sure. Boundaries change all the time. They swell and wain and even when you think your past it or it's a done deal, they can still sneak up on you and keep you in check. Just make sure you give them the space they deserve and don't ignore them knocking on the door!

[Th****]

It's normal to evolve and change over time.

That being said most of my limits are entirely dependent on the individual partner and relationship. I kind of see having the same limits regardless as being similarly as problematic as "no limits" or "my limits are only those of my partner." 

[CopperKnob]

7 hours ago, DaddyMcCheeko said:

Love the points raised but I can also see this from the other side. Sometimes it can be hard to trust a (play) partners' perception of their own boundaries and limits.
Like when they say yes, enthusiastically, safely in an informed, genuineltly consensual and reversible way and yet you know theres a part of them pushing their own limits just that bit too far. Maybe because of the dynamic you have or because maybe they know I want something too but am not quite ready to ask or show it. I've had in the past a nervous sense of imbalance at these crossroads. Like something unheathy and dark lurking in the corner of the room. And it's not always other peoppes boundaries that cause it too. With a clear mind my boundary can sometimes be carefully moved or put aside, only to find it creeping up on me unannounced.

It leaves me uneasy and nearly always results in something going wrong. I've learned to notice and give it shape when it comes.

But sure. Boundaries change all the time. They swell and wain and even when you think your past it or it's a done deal, they can still sneak up on you and keep you in check. Just make sure you give them the space they deserve and don't ignore them knocking on the door!

This is where SSC, PRICK, RACK come in I think but, I also feel that they don't go far enough.

[Kybreeze73]

As I have grown I enjoy more than expected or experienced. If you find that person who you can trust and grow with is an amazing feeling.

[Ca****]

The first year or two of being in a cuckold relationship both my gf and my limits changed quite frequently , as we got more experience the limits changed but far less often

[ma****]

Some of my limits changed. I think that with, the right person, my soft lifts will actually be gone.

[Deleted Member]

Limits change with time, some harden, some soften. New ones are made and some are removed

[GoingDown777]

Yes, they change all the time with new experiences etc. It depends on your partner too. My current one is pushing me past all my hard ones because he has a way of getting to the core of me. I wouldn't let anyone else trample them the way he's been.