Subspace for Beginners

[Skipling]

I am brand new to this. I’ve been talking to a guy and we’ve met up once just for some really light play. I’ve been reading up on pretty much everything. But I do have a couple  questions... How long does it generally take to enter your subspace? Can it happen the first time you’re with someone? 

[ey****]

it's a bit 'how long is a piece of string' because a lot of folk are different or have different triggers or different ways of relaxing or "getting into the head space"

but yes, it can certainly happen the first time you're with someone, for sure.

[li****]

As @eyemblacksheep said it depends on the person and can of course differ. It normally for me happens during play where I sink into subspace. But of course all subspace is different and some like myself can suffer a horrible subdrop a few days after the play. Yes it can for some happen the first time they play with someone, for me as I had bad experience within BDSM it took a while for me to trust my Sir enough to get my head in to that mindset of going through subspace, but aftercare is a must also. 

[cautiousswitch]

It can be tricky.  I've got fantasies with which I can get to subspace on my own if I think about them long enough but playing them out with another person may make it more difficult because I don't control the other persons actions as I do an imaginary partner. 

It can help if you've made a good connection with the other person.  Then just discussing a scene in advance can get you started on the way to subspace.  That's largely going to be because you've built trust and know their experience and preferences and they know you.

[Ky****]

I think it also depends on how comfortable a sub is with the others in the scene. If I'm working with a Dom or other sub I know it's easier to relax and sink, bit if it's new people.or even a new place, that can inhibit how quickly I go into subspace.