24/7 Lifestyle: Can we see it as another form of cohabitation with more structure?

[Deleted Member]

Hi everybody, I hope all is well with yourselves and your loved ones. 

I have always considered a 24/7 lifestyle with my slave/sub partner an enormous source of joy and mutual fulfilment. In my eyes is another form of cohabitation between 2 or more lovers only with more structure. The structure is put in place at the beginning of the cohabitation in a consensual way. It aims to spice up and keep the partner(s) excited while still experiencing fulfilment. I could also compare it to an "extended 1950 marriage" without the certificate. Nowadays, you could do a civil partnership with your sub/slave after a period of successful cohabitation and when the camaraderie has remained strong. I would compare this a little like what vanilla people do. First, get together, then cohabitate for a while and then get a civil partnership or even get married.

At times I have come across comments about 24/7 that don't match my take of what 24/7 should be. Comments vary from vague suggestions that might be too much for the sub/slave or that it will be overwhelming for both parties. However, the statement that has made me worried the most has been that a 24/7 sub/slave will lose her/his/their freedom totally and will eventually damage his/her/their well-being and mental health! 

Kinky or not, 24/7 or not, I always assumed we aim to establish a connection with our partner(s). This MUST involve caring for him/her/them! If that is our guiding principle, I cannot see how anybody will be damaged or, metaphorically speaking, "being taken for a ride"!  As unfortunate as this might be, in all relationships, vanilla too, cohabitating partners lose interest and even stop being good-hearted towards their partner(s)! I don't recall ever blaming the cohabitation per se for the issues caused. Instead, criticism is directed to the individual(s) who has been misbehaving and have not kept their part of the deal. So I am prepared to accept that there will be partner(s) in a 24/7 lifestyle that hasn't shown matured behaviours to make it work as it should. I wouldn't say of the bat, though, that there is anything wrong with the 24/7 lifestyle itself. 

I wonder what the take of our community about 24/7 is. 
Do you also see it as another form of cohabitation with more structure? or do you think there is something inherent in 24/7 making it way too challenging to make those involved fulfilled? 
In general, what is your take on it? Have you seen examples of happy couples/poly groups enjoying the lifestyle and thriving? 
 

Thank you all in advance for sharing your experience with the rest of the community and me.

HAPPY NEW YEAR - STAY SAVE - BE KIND & RESPECTUFL OF OTHERS - EMBRACE DIVERSITY! 

[ey****]

I often feel 24/7 as being an interesting one.

There's some who seem to treat it like a badge of honour that anything other than 24/7 isn't *real* - and also even within that a lot who don't acknowledge the range that could constitute as 24/7

I think a lot depends on what this looks like to the individual, how realistic that is, and how this fits with their partner

But also that to get to a desired state, is going to take time and patience and growth together - I do hear stories sometimes of couples who've tried too much too quickly and it hasn't been a natural transition and can lead to some of the aforementioned problems.

A healthy relationship that doesn't quite meet someone's fantasies is always better than an unhealthy one that seems to

[Deleted Member]

39 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

I often feel 24/7 as being an interesting one..... and how this fits with their partner  ..... a desired state, is going to take time and patience and growth together - I do hear stories sometimes of couples who've tried too much too quickly and it hasn't been a natural transition and can lead to some of the aforementioned problems.                                                                                                            A healthy relationship that doesn't quite meet someone's fantasies is always better than an unhealthy one that seems to

I couldn't agree more with the humanistic approach to your reply. 

Dom or sub, we remain humans, and we need empathy and showing care and interest for our partner(s). Patience is a great virtue for all of us. It isn't only to teach it to our subs and slaves!  

For the avoidance of doubt, I am NOT suggesting I have mastered the skill myself 🤣 Far from it, I can be such an impulsive child at times...but then Dom/Master/Lord, whatever the name my sub/slave is taught to call me, has to apologise because hurting someone's feelings IS NEVER OK! It undermines any relationship BDSM or not. Saying sorry and trying to protect the relationship it's a sign of strength!  

[ey****]

I think something that sometimes doesn't help - there was a guy on another site talking about his experience in 24/7 and it was very blatantly made up

Obviously experiences differ - but his story could be picked apart.   

However, of course, there are inexperienced subs and Dominants who may well have thought something like what he talked up was a norm - and not just a fantasy story.

[Deleted Member]

1 minute ago, eyemblacksheep said:

I think something that sometimes doesn't help - there was a guy on another site talking about his experience in 24/7 and it was very blatantly made up

Obviously experiences differ - but his story could be picked apart.   

However, of course, there are inexperienced subs and Dominants who may well have thought something like what he talked up was a norm - and not just a fantasy story.

What was that? Another horror story? I have heart of stories about 24/7 slaves being kept despite their will or being ***-driven by their Master in the UK!! In one of these stories, I knew the slave, so I volunteered to drop a call to the police. I frequently tip the police when I encounter weird situations. I feel that is the least we could all do for helping law and order. 

As soon as I mentioned the police, she changed her story and told me her Master would be crossed, and she wouldn't like him to feel abandoned! So what is the truth, and what is the fiction? Go figure...

I think people at times overdramatise, making things worse than they are. But, at the same time, it is nothing wrong to tip the police about potential coercive behaviours from one partner to another, and this isn't confined necessarily to Dominants in a 24/7 lifestyle.

[ey****]

oh in this case not really a horror story - a story of an experience he'd had (he'd clearly hadn't) and wanted again - almost with a kinda negging "you're not real Dommes cos you won't do this to me" tone.

[Deleted Member]

3 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

oh in this case not really a horror story - a story of an experience he'd had (he'd clearly hadn't) and wanted again - almost with a kinda negging "you're not real Dommes cos you won't do this to me" tone.

Ah well, I will put it down to freedom of expression! From 2016 onwards I have taught myself to be very open-minded on post content and twits. That is so long, it isn't coming from presidents of superpowers calling their supporters to drink bleach to win over COVID or creating his own mathematics where fewer 5million votes make you the winner in elections, lol!

[Wo****]

Thought provoking post,thank you.
I am currently in a 24/7 kinky support bubble. A co-dependancy parardox of sorts, we are both free to just be ourselves,whilst supporting emotionally,physically,and 'spiritually'; expressed in our kinks. In the current dysfunctional world of conditioned biases ,our survival tool ,adaptation,defence against others' potentailly fatal opinions.
Staying safe, sending best kinky intents to A/all! Respectfully🙏

[Deleted Member]

8 hours ago, BountyHunter said:

Thought provoking post,thank you.
I am currently in a 24/7 kinky support bubble. A co-dependancy parardox of sorts, we are both free to just be ourselves,whilst supporting emotionally,physically,and 'spiritually'; expressed in our kinks. In the current dysfunctional world of conditioned biases ,our survival tool ,adaptation,defence against others' potentailly fatal opinions.
Staying safe, sending best kinky intents to A/all! Respectfully🙏

Thank you very much for your kind words and for chipping in with your enriching perspective.

If it is alright with you, I would love to hear more about how a 24/7 kinky support bubble works. You got me intrigued with it. 

[Wo****]

@KinkyDomProf, thank you

How our bubble works? Now I'm flumoxed,lol. We had talked and written for months prior to meeting and playing a few times. I came to visit for a few weeks last October,UK lockdown was imposed and I 've been here ever since. During the intervening time we have shared and discussed ,with radical honesty and full disclosure everything! All with a warped sense of humour and fun. We have made the most of a bad situation,and have indulged each other in kink and empathic friendship. In the turbulent year we have explored experiences, discovered I was not a submissive masochist as I was told! I have forgiven myself ,over many en***d shames and guilt. I have learnt how to accept being adored, cherished,worshiped and loved. I have found joys in giving. I was supported and cared for through having my gallbladder removed( anything medical is trigger to me). I have been there for my M8 @Boldbald, when he lost his Father as collateral damage during the  year,( slowly over 10 weeks ,unable to visit due to restrictions,when sent home to die to free up ICU bed )..... Yet through all this, we have kept open minds, discuss all, and sometimes play 3+ times a day. We switch, dress up, and he always finds new ways to excite me, make me laugh, and has helped me and my glorious sissy @Willow75 to form and begin exploring our journey in a new dynamic. A kinky support bubble evolved out of our abilities to adapt to the 'crisis'. All of it lubricated with humour, deep belly laugh,tears aplenty, the whole process just happened. Sounds a little weird, but so is the world of ' 'normies', maybe ?

Big tribeVibes from us @FenSWitches

[Deleted Member]

19 minutes ago, BountyHunter said:

@KinkyDomProf, thank you

How our bubble works? Now I'm flumoxed,lol.....A kinky support bubble evolved out of our abilities to adapt to the 'crisis'. All of it lubricated with humour, deep belly laugh,tears aplenty, the whole process just happened. Sounds a little weird, but so is the world of ' 'normies', maybe ?

Big tribeVibes from us @FenSWitches

Aw bless you @BountyHunter!!! I am happy, along with all of you in your bubble, for finding solace amongst yourselves.! 

My insignificance has at least learned something all too well! We only have one life to live, and so long we don't hurt other people, there isn't anything weird or wrong with finding happiness and fulfilment! 

I am a bit ashamed to share that perhaps 10 years ago, I would have been that idiot that would be quick to judge you !  I bet you know those evangelical tight farts jerks! Living a fulling life following mainstream values embodied by a very middle-class upbringing. Excellent education, career, nuclear family with well-behaving poster kids, no ***, no getting wasted...you get the picture. Yet suddenly, that life started turning into an enormously unfiling stalemate! You feel something is wrong...BUT not sure what, or even you dont want to know, lol! 

No wonder why in this sad state of mind, you might feel compelled to numb your *** by judging others who at least try to HAVE SUCCESS WHERE YOU ARE FAILING! 

Thank you again for sharing your recipe to make things work in REAL LIFE, not Hollywood movies. It was a very enriching post, at least for me!