New to being a sub

[Deleted Member]

I'm new to this whole world and am concerned that I might fall hard for my Dom. I don't want to. I want an uncomplicated relationship. Any advice? 

[Holly509]

Depends a lot on the type of relationship it is Online? In person? Does your dom have other subs? I have had relationships worth my doms and just been a sub so I am always happy to help x

[Deleted Member]

It's in person and he said it's just me. Thank you so much! I just don't know how to deal with the feelings I'm beginning to have xx

[Deleted Member]

I'm sure you have your reasons as to why you don't want to fall for him..and if you keep that in mind constantly you may be able to maintain that..is he aware that you don't want what you call complications?..If he is, that may help him keep you on track as it were..if not, it's definitely something you should talk about with him..relationship goals Need to be the same if you stand any chance if a healthy dynamic  between you.

There's often a confusion between a D/s gravitas for want of a better word, and feelings of love, and/or affection, BDSM is built on trust and honest communication, that inevitably makes connections deeper, feelings are very often heightened..and it's very, very easy to confuse feelings especially when first dipping a toe into such a plethora of new and exciting experiences and reactions.

[ey****]

feelings in kink can be really fucking confusing - and - yep, you totally have my empathy.

One thing to consider is what you are falling in love with.

Are you developing feelings for him? Or the caricature in play? The feelings for kink? Or the idea or the fantasy?

What you may well actually find is you're not developing feelings for him, but the fantasy or how you feel with him.  

And if you can accept that, you can enjoy it for what it is, rather than it being complicated.  But, that is the challenge

[Deleted Member]

Be honest. Take things slow. If you want casual sex then that's that, don't over complicate things lol