Of course you love me…

[Fa****]

You love me so much you can’t have a conversation with me. I’m merely a verbal punching bag or a person you don’t deem worthy of a response to a direct question.

So much that you roll your eyes and shake your head at me.

You love me but nothing I do is good enough out up to your standards.

So much that you don’t deem me a good role model and that you questioned whether someone really wanted to be like and look like me.

You love me enough to fuck me while I cry and you don’t even notice or pressure me into a yes through great of saying no.

So much that you’re critical of me and my body and what I do or eat or how I choose to spend my time unless it’s with my legs open for your pleasure.

Fuck this.

If this is love count me out.

I don’t want to be loved any more.

I don’t need love.

I need more.

Love,

X

 

[The_Rev_]

Sharp and poignant. For me, the last sentence, though in some way I had anticipated it after having read your profile, is jarring and demands that I rethink the word 'love' in seconds.

But please, I enjoyed it very much and will be looking out for your future writing. I was taken on a journey of self-realisation and I hope, as I am sure you intended, that the right person reads it at the right time.

Or should it be "t'rite person reeds it a' t'reet thyme." I'm sorry I couldn't resist the temptayshun.

[The_Rev_]

By the way, I have to admit that I have, only now, noticed the missing comma.

[An****]

I’m so sorry.

[ol****]

Well written and well said.

[lo****]

That's a very ***ful place to be at, but leaving you start to heal. From one who has been there, you are showing yourself the love you need. Take the time needed to grieve the relationship you thought that was going to be, that you hoped it would be. Lick your wounds, do some self care and introspection so you don't fall into the same kind of relationship, and move on when you are ready.

I'm rooting for you!

[CopperKnob]

💜

[Fa****]

7 hours ago, locketheart said:

That's a very ***ful place to be at, but leaving you start to heal. From one who has been there, you are showing yourself the love you need. Take the time needed to grieve the relationship you thought that was going to be, that you hoped it would be. Lick your wounds, do some self care and introspection so you don't fall into the same kind of relationship, and move on when you are ready.

I'm rooting for you!

Thank you. The relationship still exists (unfortunately), no healing as yet. 

[The_Rev_]

That's awful to hear that you are, apparently, trapped.

[Lu****]

Uff. This is the wrong kind of sadism. I hope you find a better guy. I hope you’re not tied to him by work or family. Rooting for you ✊🏻

[co****]

Get therapy, not sympathy.

[CopperKnob]

1 hour ago, corvus4 said:

Get therapy, not sympathy.

There's no sympathy in these comments. What there is is empathy and support.
Sometimes people posting want neither. All they want is to get their thoughts out of their head.
Maybe have a think about how your own thoughts, when shared, may affect someone I'll guess you have know knowledge of.

[Fa****]

3 hours ago, corvus4 said:

Get therapy, not sympathy.

In regards to this piece of writing I have no need for therapy and I’m most definitely not looking for sympathy. You, however, already know that and as such I feel your comment is inflammatory merely for the sake of it.

To clear up any confusion, I do not write for others (unless specifically asked to) I write for ME. I write as catharsis, as a way to be free and as a way to further understand my thoughts and feelings. I DO NOT write for likes or comments or sympathy and whilst these might be things that happen due to the writing it is most definitely not the reason for the writing.

So, thank you for your well thought out comment and for being an all around jolly human being but maybe next time don’t waste your energy replying to something that doesn’t interest you. In fact, perhaps don’t read it at all.

[ca****]

just chucking this in......   as I am someone who doesn't always see / understand / make sense of other peoples writings ... until maybe a bit further down the line ( more time, more info, more understanding).  (i may be mildly autistic / on that spectrum, although not diagnosed as such)

 

FD i have read a number of your posts and can definitely sense the '***' within some of your words and your situation.....

This thread highlights the usefulness of just being able to write for your own needs.... which to me is quite a difficult thing to 'see' (understand)

Edited March 6 by callipygian

[Fa****]

23 minutes ago, callipygian said:

just chucking this in......   as I am someone who doesn't always see / understand / make sense of other peoples writings ... until maybe a bit further down the line ( more time, more info, more understanding).  (i may be mildly autistic / on that spectrum, although not diagnosed as such)

 

FD i have read a number of your posts and can definitely sense the '***' within some of your words and your situation.....

This thread highlights the usefulness of just being able to write for your own needs.... which to me is quite a difficult thing to 'see' (understand)

To be honest I tend to write when I’m highly emotional and the emotions I feel most strongly are indeed often ***ful ones, so I can totally understand why you’d “see” *** in what I write. But the catharsis it brings is good for me and also a form of therapy that can be a useful tool for some people x

[lo****]

22 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

To be honest I tend to write when I’m highly emotional and the emotions I feel most strongly are indeed often ***ful ones, so I can totally understand why you’d “see” *** in what I write. But the catharsis it brings is good for me and also a form of therapy that can be a useful tool for some people x

I see writing as an art form, like music, ***ting, etc. 

When creating art, it SHOULDN'T be an emotionless process. It should be an expression of SOMETHING we feel, and quite frankly much of the art that exists in the world DOES express ***. TRUE art comes from the heart. SOMETHING has built up to the point it needs expressed, so is cathartic for the artist.

Let the grumpy pants pass w/o the attention they are seeking and do what you do.

(My writing is for myself as well, but I share it on occasion.)