Swingers and group sex dates in your area

Hi hi! My name is Laney. I'm a 19 year old girl looking for an older man (ideally 30–55) with a calm, steady presence who enjoys giving structured, comforting spankings in a gentle, authoritative way.
I'm quite shy and soft-spoken, and it makes me a bit nervous, but I am looking for someone who can help guide me through exploring this as it's something I've wanted to do for a long time. I’m not looking for harsh punishment or sexual exchange. For me, this is about feeling safe, taken care of, and gently led. I’d like to meet with someone who knows how to be in control but not aggressively, rather someone who is confident and in control, as well as very kind and gentle. I want to feel guided through the experience: given instructions, corrected, lightly scolded, but also reassured and praised throughout. I’d like an OTK scene with clothing fully off, starting with your hand and building up to a paddle or hairbrush. I have a pretty low tolerance, so I’d want it to stay at a manageable level, but still a bit ful. A safe-word would definitely be important. Praise is something I respond to deeply, so I'd like to receive that throughout. I'd also be open to some sexual touch after a scene, but only very small, tame things like fingering, if there’s comfort and trust. But I want to be clear that I'm not looking for penetrative sex or reciprocal contact. Another thing- I’m not going to post photos of myself publicly because I really am nervous about privacy, but if we talk a bit and build some comfort, I’d be okay sharing pictures or short videos privately. I would like to meet somebody in person- ideally for a dinner or coffee or something beforehand to feel more comfortable, and then go to a hotel or other private space together for the scene. I won’t be in Bellingham over the summer, but I’d love to talk for a while and get to know you slowly, and hopefully meet up in the fall once I’m back at school. Thank you for reading!