Vetting

[Sw****]

As far as vetting. Do you vet a just play partner the same as someone you would build a long term relationship with?
Would you be just has harsh and firm or less?
What is the differences in the process

[ha****]

What a question

[ey****]

a lot depends on what the play is going to be.  The risks to me (as a guy) are lower than the risks if I was a lady.   For a lot of play I like to know the other person knows what they're doing whether that is I've seen they're experienced or know they're not 

[sc****]

In my opinion yes the vetting process should be the same. Good question

[Di****]

No. A LTR gets vetted much wider because it is going to be so much more that just arousal. As for the level of harsh and firm, honestly I am just as much in a play date as in an LTR, to the degree that the trust is there. Deeper trust and loyalty does allow me to go darker with my lusts, but no matter the arrangement, it is a progression. There are several things that must be agreed to before I play with anyone, and most people jet before I get to them. Which is OK because if we don't vibe, there's no reason in wasting each other's time on mediocre or unfulfilling sex and play. As a result, I have very very few play partners.

[sc****]

Theres no reason why a play partnership cant last a long time, I've known ppl to be play partners for years. Really it's all relative n depends on the person.

[Deleted Member]

100%, it’s important

[Pl****]

Abso-friggin-lutely As females we should always be aware of and for your safety.

As far as play is concerned: know what you are looking for. Be clear on your intentions and boundaries.

[RA****]

Most of the time I'm not sure if the person being vetted is a one time play partner, long yerm play partner, or will end up being a LTR.  I girss vettingbis the same to start for all.

[Zo****]

...Yeah, don't trust any top that says vetting isn't important.

In my opinion the chief difference between a vanilla LTR vetting process and a kinky vetting process is time frame. In a vanilla relationship, you can take the time to build trust. Get to know each other step by step, and assume risk at the level you are comfortable.

With power dynamics, the bottom isn't always in control of the amount of risk they're assuming. Often that's kind of the point. To put yourself in that situation requires a lot of trust up front.

Community is a great way to handle this. Being able to meet other people who have played with a potential partner, to see how they treat others, and to play in community spaces that aren't isolated.

If that sort of community isn't available, I think a strict and cautious vetting process is entirely warranted. Trust is earned, and anyone who isn't willing to earn it doesn't deserve it.