Need some personal advice: 9 years later

[an****]

15 hours ago, smafu said:

I'm really surprised how people here are so monogamous 😬 Relationships change. Sometimes it's really hard to accept that and flow with it, but your way of describing the situation makes me think that you are aware of the situation, of your needs. Of course you are hurting. We all have expectations, and it's difficult not to have them met.
However, you have a strong bond with this person, if the communication is clear, if you both can adjust your needs and if you don't want to put on each other the weight of being everything for you, I think you both can be happy in this at one point.
We all love differently, and loving more people does not make you love less someone.
I wish for you beautiful and meaningful bonds, discovering other people, finding how amazing it is to have your friends and lovers around you. Friends are undervalued when it comes to one's need to be loved.
Also, as of the dominance and being cared for: I think all of us tend to be drawn sexually to the opposite side of what we have to be in our lives. Most doms are indecisive and more dependent in real life than subs.
Sending you a lot of hugs 🫂

For real, poly is a thing. As for the OP: Ask your partner to help you. A good sign that poly will work is mutual support and compassion. Seek what you desire, not in your partner, but the feeling that is missing, seek that. If it's non-sexual maybe a hobby would 'scratch the itch '. Know that a lot of poly relationships are not a full production orgy every night, some partners have partners and some don't, and many don't share. It is all what you agree to and it's still your team just because you two are not having sex (assumption) don't lose your best friend. Either way you choose (adapt or exit) just give yourself grace and use this time while you still have someone in your life. Build friends, relationships, patterns (coffee/bar/cafe routine) repeat exposure. Because being lonely in a relationship can surely suck, but alone lonely is where depression thrives, try to avoid that.