Smoking for your Dom ?s

[ho****]

So I’m here because I have a few questions .. with smoking.

I’m a bratty sub, and recently my Dom has expressed he has a smoking fetish and wants to explore. While we have discussed before nothing much came from it - during a scene he tried to get me to smoke but I was caught off guard and he took it offensively (like hard pass .. which it was not).

As we have begun discussing it again, I’ve realized he is looking for more of a slight submission … as in I’m in control to make him happy for his kink (I have no issue doing this for him at all mind you).

My issue is this.. I have maybe 5% switch in me… I’ve always been a sub and have never been in charge like that. I tense and get anxious. And while I’ve researched some, he’s also in want of pain from a burn. I have never done anything like that before - done to me? Yes. - so I know what it feels like.

So if you’ve made it this far … does anyone have any suggestions on how to proceed with this? Even if just small steps. I am already a smoker - I’ve tried to playfully blow smoke in his face and while I got a smirk out of him that was about all.

How do I manage to pull myself out of submissive and into switching, even if just enough to meet his needs?

Thank you xx

[Ra****]

Just ash it on him. Tease him with the warmth of the burning cherry on the end. Start with a quick touch and judge the reaction. Look for his dick to twitch. Usually means they like it! Hope this helps!

[ey****]

Has he done this before?

the reason I ask; because if he hasn't this is something that can go horribly wrong

Some people just like to watch someone smoking

Some people like this close enough to smell, perhaps not just blowing smoke into face, but into mouth - the person inhaling and exhaling the second hand smoke.    So far so good

Some like to be used as an ashtray - this is flicking ash into the mouth - this usually cools in the air 

Now so far this is stuff  I like doing

for extinguishing the cigarette or otherwise using it to burn

I am happy for it to be stubbed in my mouth - it is usually better to let phlem build under the tongue and put it out in there - if the mouth looks too dry, spit it in and put it out in the spit.   This will cause a sizzle but the spit cools down the cigarette

if you do put it out in the mouth it may burn the mouth or tongue - the sensation is similar to, say, biting into a pizza which is too hot - and the same kinda result that you can still feel it a few days later

Some people like the cigarette stubbed out on their skin or the cigarette used to burn.  This is hot - this does create burns and these can take weeks to heal.  you both need to know what you're getting into and what you both want before you go through with this

ALSO

you are allowed boundaries and your boundaries can be "no, I don't want to do this for you"