Musings Of An Idle Mind - Kink Or Vanilla

[Fa****]

46 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I feel called out!😂

But I like you

[littlemiss37]

I do get what u r saying . I came in last October and tbh my experience has not been a positive one . I do attend events one to twice a week . X

[xc****]

i hope you don’t give up, gemini. we’ve talked briefly before and you’re such a kind soul.. easy to chat with and even tho i don’t know you at all, i’ve read so much of what you’ve written and feel like you’re just a cool person all around.. who knows what’s around the corner. i say.. check out more apps than this one (if you haven’t done so already) and keep going. wish you the best. 💛

[ge****]

3 hours ago, xcacoethes said:

i hope you don’t give up, gemini. we’ve talked briefly before and you’re such a kind soul.. easy to chat with and even tho i don’t know you at all, i’ve read so much of what you’ve written and feel like you’re just a cool person all around.. who knows what’s around the corner. i say.. check out more apps than this one (if you haven’t done so already) and keep going. wish you the best. 💛

Thank you, that's very kind and don't get me wrong I'm not bemoaning my situation, and know the options open to me - is more the quandary around kink vs vanilla that I'm musing on and whether compromising one for the other is an option

[ge****]

4 hours ago, littlemiss37 said:

I do get what u r saying . I came in last October and tbh my experience has not been a positive one . I do attend events one to twice a week . X

Sorry your experience hasn't been positive, but from all I've seen of you around the forums you're taking the right steps and learning which can ultimately only be a positive thing

[littlemiss37]

4 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Sorry your experience hasn't been positive, but from all I've seen of you around the forums you're taking the right steps and learning which can ultimately only be a positive thing

Thanks I can wither learn nothing or learn about the experience and notice that I want more and deserve more x

[se****]

I've heard of stories of people going vanilla, then realizes it's not for them. Never heard stories of people happy being vanilla.😅 Heard alot of stories people being alone by choice, and being contempt.

Just do both, then the answers will come to you.

Edited April 1, 2023 by seonny
Wrote it wrong.

[Chloebear]

18 hours ago, gemini_man said:

Oh totally agree re the person is more important than the kink, and love the "It's not impossible to find the right person through kink, but it might be easier to find kink through the right person" notion....but that's part of the dilemma - what if you are unable to find kink through that person? Will that right person become the wrong person?
.
Know I've said I "think" I can forego kink but I don't *know* I can and that's part of what gives me pause for thought.

I get what you mean…. Yes it’s tricky. I think it will always be in you, the pull to kink. And I think it can make the right person difficult to be with, unless there’s openness to trying or allowing poly.

You seem like a considerate, kind, astute and eloquent person from your posts, someone will be very lucky to meet you :)

[ge****]

4 hours ago, Chloebear said:

I get what you mean…. Yes it’s tricky. I think it will always be in you, the pull to kink. And I think it can make the right person difficult to be with, unless there’s openness to trying or allowing poly.

You seem like a considerate, kind, astute and eloquent person from your posts, someone will be very lucky to meet you :)

Far too kind but thank you 😊

It's an interesting thing to ponder for sure even if it is also a dilemma of sorts

[ge****]

5 hours ago, seonny said:

I've heard of stories of people going vanilla, then realizes it's not for them. Never heard stories of people happy being vanilla.😅 Heard alot of stories people being alone by choice, and being contempt.

Just do both, then the answers will come to you.

Oh there are plenty who are happy with vanilla - whether they ever had any notion of kink however is another matter

[Jeromiah]

Well I feel your ***. I’ve wanted to have my fantasies fulfilled and to find a long term partner or a few but it’s so hard and I still haven’t gotten to do anything al all vanilla or otherwise because everyone I’ve talked to so far ghosts me or doesn’t seem willing to let me get to know them properly and build up trust and a connection first